


All In

by angellwings



Category: Timeless (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Romance, Speculation, Spoilers for 2x04, Spoilers for 2x05, spoilers for 2x01-2x03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 23:15:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 51,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14146743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angellwings/pseuds/angellwings
Summary: Spoilers for 2x01-2x05 and then purely speculation with no factual basis for everything else. Summary: After he realizes his mistakes, Wyatt has to set things right. He has to prove himself to Lucy. NOW COMPLETE.





	1. All In

**Author's Note:**

> So, let me start with: **I know nothing about how this season will end which means what I'm writing here is not based on spoilers.** I have basically posed a lot of what ifs based on what's happened in season 2 thus far and decided to do something with them. For example: what if Lucy/Wyatt/Jessica is as painful as it possibly can be? How would Wyatt and Lucy recover? What if the love triangle is resolved at the very last second of the very last episode? What would that mean? Well, honestly, that would mean Wyatt would have a lot to make up for. A lot to prove. A lot of ground to regain. That would also mean Wyatt would have no more hesitance about what he felt for Lucy. He'd be completely and openly in love with her. He'd have to fight for Lucy and he'd be much more than willing to do so. In asking myself these what ifs, I came up with this fic idea.
> 
> In order to write it, I had to vaguely and quickly imagine ways S2 could end. Again, though, not based on spoilers. Just inferred from what we've seen so far. I'm probably going to be way wrong but I needed to write this fic for therapy reasons. So, yeah, **just wanted to make that clear for those of you living the spoiler free life. You have nothing to fear here.** ;)

Would there ever be a time when Wyatt Logan didn't have regrets?

He seemed to always make five wrong decisions before finding the right one. Getting that text from Jessica and running out on Lucy was the first wrong decision. Letting Lucy push him away was the second. Not realizing immediately that he and Jessica would never really make eachother happy was the third. Deciding that if Lucy didn't want him then he should try with Jess was the fourth. Letting Lucy believe she was less of a priority than Jessica was the final and fifth regret. That final regret really encompassed the previous four and culminated in a set back of trust that felt suffocating.

He'd figured it out, in the end. After watching Lucy from afar and only having the most minimal of professional interactions with her, he'd realized he couldn't do minimal and professional. Not with Lucy. He'd realized that Lucy made him want to be better. _Lucy_ was the reason he wasn't still that jealous and angry asshole who'd pushed Jessica away. He smiled brighter with her, laughed more. Even when things were tense and dangerous and he feared he wasn't up for the job she somehow soothed him. She left him feeling simultaneously in control and out of it. He thought more clearly and felt more deeply around her than anyone else.

He wouldn't and, truly, couldn't live without her. It was why even when he got Jess back, like he thought he wanted, Lucy plagued his every thought. He tried to not think about her, to not want her, to not miss their closeness. But goddammit he couldn't.

When he and Lucy were their furthest apart, when the wall between them was the thickest it had ever been, he felt himself coming unglued. He woke up in the middle of the night with memories of 1941 and the ghost of her touch. And if he did manage to sleep, in the mornings he'd ache to have her in his arms with her hands running through his hair. Everything about 1941 haunted him. Every moment of every day, even while willing himself to try with Jessica.

His mind kept whispering, _you almost had it all, you could have that right now, you came so close to perfect._

_You could have had her._

He remembered they'd been so happy to have each other. The joy and warmth had been clear on her face. They laughed and flirted and teased and he even heard her _giggle_. Lucy Preston's giggle was committed to memory. It was rare and beautiful and he realized much too late that he'd give _everything in him_ to hear it again.

He had loved Jessica, a part of him always would. But with Lucy...he didn't just love her.

 _She owned him_. Every part of him belonged to her.

He should have seen that sooner. But she claimed him so gradually and so quietly that he hadn't even noticed until there was a rift between them at least as big as The Grand Canyon. He felt that ownership then. He felt it in every bone in his body.

He knew then that none of this was fair to Jessica. Trying with her while Lucy was ever present in his life, even while being more emotionally distant than she'd ever been, was worse than failing to fix things. It was more hurtful to Jessica than anything he'd done before.

Once he realized how deeply Lucy had embedded herself in his heart, he couldn't bring himself to keep it from Jessica.

It had been a difficult conversation but a necessary one. Jessica had seemed sad and disappointed but not devastated. Mostly she seemed relieved.

She had given him a half hearted smile and shrugged. "We both had one foot out the door long before now. It's never the way anyone wants these things to end, but sometimes," she said with resigned sigh. "People just don't fit. I get it, Wyatt. And now we both know. We can both move on."

The words " _nothing ahead but the open road"_ flashed across his memory before he could stop them. He'd said those exact same words to Lucy way back in 1955. That felt so long ago. And yet it didn't.

Jessica had paused and then continued with tiniest of smirks. "Good luck."

He knew that look. That was a secretive look. One she had when she knew something he didn't. He wondered what she was thinking or what reason she was wishing him luck. But he didn't ask.

He didn't ask because as soon as the conversation ended all hell broke loose.

The next several hours were exhausting and frantic and contained the full spectrum of human emotions. He never knew a person could feel so much at once until he took this assignment.

When the dust settled, Carol had chosen Lucy over Rittenhouse and made the ultimate sacrifice, taking Keynes out with her. She'd left Lucy a letter detailing what Emma had done to ensure Amy would never come back, in the hopes Lucy could find a way to correct it. He was sure there were other things in the letter but Lucy wasn't in a place where she was really willing to share that with him.

Not that he blamed her.

They'd won the battle but the war still raged. Rittenhouse was still out there and now they had Emma Whitmore as their leader, which was a terrifying thought. Despite Keynes death she was fully invested in his "perfection everlasting" insanity and her determination to avenge her esteemed leader made her more lethal than ever.

Upon hearing that he and Jessica had made a firm decision to split, Christopher had offered to relocate Jessica and keep her hidden from Rittenhouse. Jessica had agreed and now the only person who knew how to find her was Denise Christopher. He felt relief at that. Jessica was safe. They'd resolved any lingering resentment from the years of marriage he both remembered and didn't remember. And they were moving on.

The grief and guilt and misery that he lived with for years was gone.

In its place was grief and guilt and misery regarding someone else entirely.

_Lucy Preston._

After he made his decision, after he talked to Jess, while they were fighting Rittenhouse and the stakes were so high that he was convinced he would lose not just Lucy, but his entire team, he told her. In a haze of gunfire and screaming and fear he spoke his truth out loud for her (and Rufus) to hear because she had a plan but it was a suicidal plan. He could not let her take that kind of risk and still play his cards close to his chest. She needed to know that he wasn't taking her for granted anymore.

Rufus, Lucy, and himself were taking cover. Pressed shoulder to shoulder against a stone wall. Wyatt was on the the side closest to the enemy with his side arm primed and ready, Rufus was on the other side to keep a lookout for unexpected visitors, and Lucy was in the middle clutching Rufus's hand like a lifeline. She didn't dare hold his. They both knew why and even amidst the gunfire it hurt.

"I'm gonna make a run for it," Lucy told them both. "Draw Keynes out, when I do cut him off on either side. Okay?"

Rufus gave her a fearful glance which she tried to placate with a half hearted smile. Wyatt could tell it didn't work because Rufus clutched her hand tighter. "Don't die. Don't get shot."

Despite the situation Lucy chuckled and winked at him. "Remember serpentine, Rufus."

Rufus bared his teeth in a smile that almost forced the tension to fall away and laughed lightly. It was a reference to something that Wyatt didn't understand, something he'd clearly missed during his time with Jess. It emphasized the distance he knew engulfed them.

"Absolutely," Rufus replied as he squeezed her hand before finally releasing it with a fond grin. "Classic."

She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. He watched in amazement as her fear was clouded over and covered with determination and frustration. "This ends here. We've been through enough."

She was fire and steel and he couldn't help but marvel at her. He couldn't let her go out there thinking...

Thinking what? That he didn't love her? Didn't need her? Didn't regret ever being without her?

A shot ricocheted off the corner of the wall he was leaning against and the reality of what could happen to her hit him. He'd respected her wish for distance all this time but here and now...how could he stay away?

She moved to rush past him but he gently wrapped a hand around her elbow and pulled her into his arms instead. She froze at the contact but he didn't let go. His hand that wasn't carefully holding his gun away from her rested on the back of her neck while his fingers softly caressed the soft skin there. He felt and heard her sharp intake of breath against him as she allowed herself to relax and wrap her arms around him. For a brief moment he felt her press her face against his shoulder. It was glorious. He almost forgot they were in the middle of a war.

God, he missed her. He saw her every goddamn day but never really got to _see_ her. Not anymore.

"Be careful," he pleaded. "Come back to me."

In more ways than one, he thought.

"Not sure I can make that promise," she said with a nervous breath.

"You have to. None of this is worth losing you. I won't do it without you," he assured her. He wanted to kiss her but he knew that wouldn't be welcome. Hell, the hug was probably already crossing a line.

"Wyatt..." she pulled back from his embrace as her sentence trailed off. She didn't seem to have any more words because she stopped talking completely and met his eyes with a look of resignation and sadness. She didn't need to say anything else, her eyes said it all. _You may have to._

Hell no, that wasn't an option.

He shook his head at her and pressed his forehead against hers, his hand on her neck was now clutching her desperately. Grasping at her presence for as long as he could. "It's you or no one else, Lucy. It's you or no one."

He'd love her or he wouldn't love at all. He hoped that was clear. He hoped she understood. But for good measure he continued, "I love you."

Her eyes were wide and watery as she swallowed back tears and pried his hand away from her neck. He knew then the wall was back up. He broke through for a breathtaking moment, but that's all it was. A moment.

It was going to take more than three little words to win her back. He would, though. They'd get out of this alive and he would show her. He would prove it.

"I'll draw him out, you cut him off," she repeated as the steel and fire returned to her eyes.

He nodded and brought his attention back to the fight, back to getting the three of them out of there alive.

The moment Lucy disappeared around the corner Rufus caught his eye.

"You good?" He asked.

It was his way of gaging Wyatt's emotional state. He knew Rufus had seen and heard every bit of what just went down with Lucy. He didn't care. He didn't care who knew. He loved Lucy Preston and he wasn't wasting anymore time denying it.

"Not yet," Wyatt answered. "But I will be."

Once they got out of this, once they were safe, once he proved to Lucy he wasn't going anywhere...

Once he checked all those boxes, _then_ he'd be good.

The confrontation with Keynes turned out to be more emotional than physical but it had ended with him authorizing every Rittenhouse agent in the place to assassinate Lucy Preston. Wyatt was in front of her before he even realized his feet were moving. A moment later Rufus was there too, followed shortly by Garcia Flynn. Wyatt may hate the guy, but he was grateful for his help now. They surrounded her on all sides. They'd have to kill them all to get to her and he believed wholeheartedly they would.

Lucy's hand landed on his shoulder and he turned to meet her eyes. He wished he hadn't. Her red rimmed brown eyes were pleading with him to move, to step out of the way. He shook his head and stood firm, but her hand rubbed his arm consolingly.

"Wyatt, no, please."

"Lucy, they'll-"

"They'll kill me either way, Soldier," Lucy said sadly. "I'd rather they not take out everyone I care about too."

While the four of them had been distracted and huddled together, Carol Preston had snuck up behind her grandfather with a vicious glare.

"Not my daughter, I won't let you hurt her."

_Pop. Pop. Pop._

A split second later Carol was standing alone with a gun in her hand as Keynes body fell to the ground, limp and empty.

He didn't know Carol. He'd only seen her in passing. But as Keynes fell her eyes met his with a determined stare.

"Get her out of here, Master Sergeant."

The combination of her tone and his training caused his mind to process it as an order. But he knew there wasn't enough time to get out. The hired guns were already focusing their fire on Carol. _Shit._ He tucked Lucy into his arms and twisted them around so she wouldn't see, wouldn't get caught in the crossfire, just as a round of bullets was fired at Carol Preston.

Lucy cried out against his chest and clutched at him. She hadn't seen but she knew. She was sobbing loudly and her fisted hands were pounding weakly against him. _She knew._

He had no time to soothe her now. He shared an urgent look with Flynn, they both knew the four of them were next. Flynn grabbed Rufus and shoved him toward the door while Wyatt kept Lucy tucked into his side and ran for dear life. The door of the saloon closed behind them just as shots rang out.

"We have to get out of here," Flynn yelled.

"I know," Wyatt replied. "Lifeboat, _now."_

"But Emma's still out there with the Mothership!" Rufus yelled.

"We stopped Keynes's plan and _him_ ," Wyatt said as he gave his friend an apologetic look. "That will have to be enough for today."

"M-my mother," Lucy stuttered out as her feet stopped moving beside of him. "We can't just leave her there."

Her voice was small and tearful. He hurt all over at the sound of it.

"We can't go back, Lucy," Wyatt said softly. "If we go back there then what she did means nothing. She chose you," Wyatt assured her in a hoarse emotional voice of his own as he brushed a stray hair out of her devastated face. He knew that was what she wanted. She'd admitted as much to him late one night before things had gone to hell. "She chose to protect to you over being loyal to Rittenhouse. She wanted you safe. She wanted _me_ to keep you safe. She gave me an order. Let me follow it?" He asked in as gentle a voice as he could.

His hand cupped her cheek while his thumb lightly traced over the curve of her cheek bone. She closed her eyes and let a few silent tears fall before she nodded against his hand. "Okay."

They made it to the Lifeboat moments before Emma and her goons caught up with them. Gun fire bounced off the machine as it roared and spun to life. It echoed around them and Lucy flinched every time. He watched her every movement and every expression. The Time Team won but Lucy lost and he was worried. How much more could she stand to lose? What was worse than that was the knowledge that he was a part of that. He let her lose him. _He let himself become someone she grieved over_.

While in the past she let him comfort her even if it had been rushed, but once they were back in 2018 she shut him out again. Once they were in the silo, she all but ran away from him. Rufus followed her, leaving Flynn and himself to brief Christopher on their harrowing escape.

Carol Preston and Nicholas Keynes were dead. Rittenhouse survived.

Lucy was left mourning someone. _Again._

He didn't see her for the rest of the night. He needed to do something to help her somehow. He looked at the time and realized it had been too long since any of them had eaten. He threw together something that usually comforted him and then headed to the room Lucy shared with Jiya. He knocked, and after a moment, Jiya answered the door with a half hearted smile. She opened the door further to reveal Rufus and Lucy sitting side by side on Lucy's cot. Between them sat a half empty box of Chocodiles.

"See?" Rufus said as he bumped Lucy shoulder with a smirk. "Told you they were good."

"I can't believe I'm eating this," Lucy said with a watery chuckle as she held up the half eaten snack and a smile that almost reached her eyes.

"Then how about something a little more substantial?" Wyatt asked.

Two sets of eyes looked up at him curiously. He noticed Lucy's never actually met his.

"You made us food?" She asked in surprise.

He gave her a warm smile and lifted one shoulder carelessly. "Comfort food. Grilled cheese."

He stacked four paper plates on top of eachother each with a grilled cheese sandwich. He passed them around and handed Lucy's hers last. She accepted it with a small smile and nod.

"Thanks," she told him as he sat down next to Jiya on the other cot.

"Anything for you, ma'am," he answered with a small soft smile. He caught the barest of smirks as he called her ma'am and he felt a tiny thrill of hope.

Her eyes were still wet but now they were also swollen and puffy. Her nose was a bit red. He spotted a small trash can at her feet that had more than a few tissues dropped into it. She'd been crying and Rufus and Jiya were comforting her. That used to be him comforting her. Not anymore.

"You know what we're missing?" Jiya asked suddenly as she glanced around the room. "Drinks. We're missing drinks. Rufus," she said as she stared pointedly at him. "Help me get them from the kitchen?"

Rufus looked between Lucy and Wyatt, knowing they'd see right through it, and gave them a sheepish smile. "Yeah, sure," he answered as he let Jiya pull him out of the room and down the hall.

With their mutual friends gone, all that was left was silence and sadness and regret.

After a moment, Wyatt cleared his throat and decided to speak.

"I'm sorry about your mom, Lucy," he said as he watched her face carefully. "I'm so sorry. If I could have gotten to her in time I-"

"You couldn't have, Wyatt," Lucy assured him as she swallowed back numerous emotions. He saw them all flash across her face in a split second. "She knew when she confronted Keynes that she wouldn't be making it out. No one could have gotten to her in time."

"She loved you," Wyatt told her as she finally met his eyes. Warm blue clashed with hopeless brown. He felt a pang in his chest. "I could see it in her face when she spoke to me. She loved you."

Lucy tried to smile gratefully at him but the smile quickly turned into trembling tight lips. Her brow furrowed and her eyes filled with tears. Her hands covered her face and he immediately crossed the distance to sit next to her.

"What good does that do when she's not _here_ , Wyatt?" Lucy asked in a low aching voice. "What good does that do _now_?"

What she needed that night was a friend so that's what he let himself be. He tabled any thoughts of his earlier confession for another time. She needed to get through this. She needed to say goodbye to the mother she'd never really known. He needed to be there for her. She surprised him completely by _letting him_ be there for her.

When news of a memorial service came up in an internet search two days later, Lucy wanted to go. Agent Christopher said it was too much of a risk. It could even be a trap set by Rittenhouse to find her or any of them.

She was right. Wyatt's training left him with much the same fears.

But Lucy deserved to say goodbye to her mother.

She'd lost her sister and had no one to grieve with.

He couldn't let the same thing happen with her mother.

The morning of the memorial service he woke her, asked her to get dressed, and meet him outside her room. He expected her to question him or to protest. He knew he wasn't her favorite person any more. Not anywhere close. She threw him for a loop though when she sat up and nodded sleepily. When she stepped out into the hallway he tossed her black baseball cap at her. It was the one Christopher always made her wear to visit Flynn.

Her brow furrowed at him. "What is this for?"

"Well, we can't have any Rittenhouse agents recognizing you at the service, can we?" He asked.

Her eyes widened at him and she smiled brightly before launching herself at him in a hug. Her hugs were still the same. Lucy hugged with everything she had in her. She hugged fiercely and with force. It had been so long since she hugged him like that and he wasn't prepared to catch her. He stumbled back into the wall, careful to keep her angled away, and returned her embrace.

"Don't get too excited, Professor," he said softly as he tightened his hold on her. He didn't know when he'd be this close to her again. He planned to enjoy it. "We still have to get out of this hellhole."

They did. It was almost too easy. So easy that he wondered if Agent Christopher had let them escape this time. They'd kept their distance at the service, but they were close enough for Lucy to hear every word. Stories from her mother's students and colleagues and friends. He had to admit, these people made Carol sound like a remarkable woman, a "superwoman" as Lucy had described her. Wyatt wanted to pay his respects for Lucy's sake but even given the sacrifice she made, he found himself still resentful of Carol Preston and all the pain she caused Lucy.

Then again.

Had he really been any better?

Carol battled with choosing Lucy over her past and so did he. They both made the right decision in the end but while figuring out their own shit they left Lucy scarred.

Alright, so maybe he resented the woman a little less now.

They hung back until everyone left and then approached the graveside. Wyatt stayed several paces behind and let Lucy have a moment but kept a watchful eye on their surroundings. In case Rittenhouse really was here, waiting on them.

She was talking to the headstone. He'd done that himself with Jessica, Grandpa Sherwin, his mother. It helped. He knew it did. He couldn't make out her words and he didn't want to. That was for Lucy to share with him, not for him to overhear. When she was done she ran a hand across the top of the headstone before turning to face him.

His chest ached at the sight of her tear stained face. Lucy didn't deserve to lose this much. Lucy didn't deserve to lose at all.

She wiped at her face with sleeve of her sweatshirt as they walked back to their stolen car. He didn't reach for her like he wanted, his hands stayed in his pockets. He assumed she still wanted space. She never told him otherwise. So he was determined to let her initiate any physical demonstrations of affection.

She was quiet on the drive back and on their way back into bunker. Once they reached the bottom of the ladder and their feet hit the grimy bunker floor, she hugged him again. His second Lucy Preston Hug within 24 hours.

"Thank you," Lucy said with a sniffle. "I-I needed that, today."

One hand cradled the back of her neck and his other arm was wrapped around her waist. She fit so perfectly against him and he missed her. He wanted her back. Yes, she turned to him in her grief but that didn't mean things had changed. He still had a long road ahead.

"Anything for you, Lucy," he replied softly. He had said it to her before and he planned to keep saying it until she believed it.

She pulled back from the hug and met his eyes with conflicted sigh. "Before when Keynes had us pinned down...you...you said some things."

He nodded. "I told you I love you. Yes, I remember."

He wasn't going to hedge around it. If she wanted to talk about it then he would talk about it.

She shook her head at him and then focused her gaze on the floor. "Look, it was an intense moment and we thought we might be done for so I get that you may have—“

He cut her off with a dry chuckle and a shake of his head. "No. Lucy, that wasn't what that was. Yes, the risk encouraged me to tell you in that moment. But I was going to anyway, the next minute I had the opportunity. Danger or no danger. I love you. I know that with more certainty than anything I've ever known before. I'm not asking to have that confession reasoned away."

"I told you not to let me be the reason things ended with Jessica," she said with a sigh. She still wouldn't look at him.

"All due respect, _ma'am_ ," he said as he stared intently at the top of her head.

The 'ma'am' got her attention and her eyes finally met his. He heard her suck in a breath and knew his feelings were reflected in his eyes. Though, weren't they always when it came to Lucy?

"It wasn't because of you, it was because of _me_. Staying with Jessica when all I could think about every hour of every day was _you_ , wasn't fair to Jessica or myself. Jess and I had problems before she died and we still had those problems when she came back. But they were different because I was different and the only reason I wasn't whatever asshole she married in her timeline was because _of you_. You make me the person I want to be, you make me better. I'm choosing to be the person I am with you and not the hateful man I was with Jess. _That's my choice._ You're a part of that choice, Lucy. Even if you never reach a place where you can love me, it won't matter. All I want is to be near you. If that means being your friend then fine. I'd rather be alone and be your friend. It's like I said during that battle for our lives, I'll love you or I'll love no one. Those are my only options."

By the time he was done she was crying and shaking her head, with one hand pressed to her lips. She took a long moment and then finally spoke. "I don't know if I can...if I can fall like that again, Wyatt. I did it once and there was no one there to catch me. Right now, I can't risk that again. _I can't._ "

God, he really hated himself for doing that to her. He knew she'd never been in love. They discussed it in a cabin in Arkansas in 1934. The first time she let herself fall was six years later in Hedy Lamarr's guest house _with him_ and he ended up hurting her. The hesitance and the pain in her eyes was because _of him_.

"I know, Lucy. I know and I'm so goddamn sorry that I—I never meant to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you. Intention doesn't change what happened though, does it?" He asked rhetorically. "I can't blame you for being careful. I screwed up. We both know it. But I'm not going anywhere. I can wait."

Even to his own ears his tone was firm and confident. It would be painful to watch her struggle with caring for him. They never struggled with that before. Caring for each other always came easily for them. But now it would be. She suffered through Jessica so he could suffer through this. It was only fair. It was only what he deserved.

"Wait for what?" Lucy asked him as she chewed her bottom lip nervously.

"For you, Lucy. I can wait for you. I can wait until I've proved to you that I'm here. I'll always catch you. I just need you to give me a chance to do that," he pleaded.

She swallowed thickly, took a deep breath, and met his eyes again with a nod. "Okay, prove to me that you're all in and...I'll think about it."

Her eyes were heartbroken yet hopeful. She didn't know if he could do it but she was willing to let him try. That was a very big step in the right direction. He knew it.

He gave her his trademark smirk and a confident nod. "Oh, I'll prove it."

The corners of her mouth turned up in the tiniest of smiles as she chuckled lightly at him. "We'll see."

There was no doubt in his mind. He would prove it. Even if it took the rest of their lives, _h_ _e would prove it._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So I have decided that this story is going to be an ongoing series of moments. Some small, some big, some short, some long. But all of them important. Different ways Wyatt would begin to regain his ground and remind Lucy why she fell in love with him to begin with it. I'm not sure how frequently these will come to me but I imagine the more pain the show inflicts the more I will want to write about a Wyatt who is completely focused on making Lucy Preston happy.  
> Happy reading!  
> Angellwings

(2/?)

The letter from Carol Preston had been mailed to Agent Christopher's office. The one she was rarely in. But she was in it enough to check her mail. Before it even touched Lucy's hands Christopher had it thoroughly investigated and tested for any contaminants. Anything that might be a trap or a threat. They found nothing.

So a week after Carol Preston saved them all, Lucy finally got to read the letter.

He expected her to hide. Maybe read it in her and Jiya's room. But she didn't. She stayed out in the open living space. Wyatt kept an eye on her as the rest of them started a game of Monopoly. She picked one of the arm chairs and spread across it. Her legs were slung over the side of one arm and her back rested against the other.

Her brow was furrowed and she was biting down on her lip, sure signs of concentration. But he didn't see any tears yet. He supposed that was good.

One of Lucy's hands released the neatly folded pages and absently rubbed her lips. Her hands always went to her face when she was trying _not_ to be emotional.

He checked to make sure it wasn't his turn before he got up and headed to the kitchen. He didn't want to draw attention to her. She wouldn't want that. So he casually grabbed the box of tissues off kitchen table top and then placed them in her lap. He didn't look at her or say a word. He just left them for her and then went back to the kitchen.

He put a kettle of water on the stove and then came back to the game while it boiled. He only risked a glance at her once he was seated and he found her giving him a grateful watery smile. He returned the smile and nodded at her in acknowledgement. After his next turn the water began to boil and he excused himself to make two mugs of tea.

He placed one on the end table next to Lucy's chair and kept one for himself. He didn't really like tea but making some for himself diminished any attention she might have received. His sat untouched but he was relieved to see her set the letter aside for a moment to cradle the mug and sip from it.

"Who's winning?" Lucy asked.

"Jiya," Rufus said as he gave his girlfriend a suspicious glare. "But she's playing dirty."

"You say dirty, I say smart," Jiya said with a smirk and a shrug.

"No," Wyatt said with a chuckle. "You straight up play dirty."

"I'm still following all the rules. You're just being babies cause I'm smoking you."

Lucy grinned at them and chuckled. "You realize, this game is going to take forever, don't you?"

"What else are we gonna do?" Rufus asked. "We're trapped down here and the Mothership hasn't jumped in over a week."

"Thank God," Wyatt said said in relief. "I'm starting to hate that eyeball."

"Starting to?" Rufus asked. "It's taken you this long to hate it?"

"Hey, it brought all of us together so I was trying to give it the benefit of the doubt," Wyatt said with a smirk.

"Honestly, that's probably the best thing to come from inventing a time machine," Rufus agreed with a smile and a nod. "Even if I'm stuck in this bunker for who knows how long. That makes it worth it."

Lucy smiled softly at the three of them but didn't voice her agreement. He couldn't blame her. She'd lost so much since meeting them. He wasn't sure he'd consider it worth it either were he in her shoes. After a moment she shrugged and grinned. "If nothing else, meeting exceptional people through history has been pretty thrilling."

"You would find that thrilling," Jiya said with a teasing grin. "Nerd."

"Says the engineer who regularly mourns the loss of some furball Star Trek thing," Lucy said with a smirk.

"Tribble, it's called a Tribble and I got it at Comic Con and now it's gone.I should never have taken it to work," Jiya replied with a mournful shake of her head.

Rufus chuckled at her and then rubbed her back soothingly. "Honestly, we're all nerds here."

"Not Wyatt," Jiya said as she narrowed her eyes on him. "Not that I know of at least."

Lucy and Rufus exchanged knowing looks before they both laughed. Wyatt shook his head at them and sighed. They were about to tell Jiya just how wrong she was and he was going to pretend to hate it, but really he couldn't hate it. Lucy was smiling and laughing and looked more relaxed than she had in days. They could make fun of him all day if they wanted as long as she kept laughing.

"Oh Jiya," Lucy said with a chuckle. "You have no idea how wrong you are."

Rufus nodded his agreement. "We've seen him go fanboy exactly twice and it was hilarious both times."

Jiya chuckled. "Well, I can guess one was NASCAR considering the way he talked before the jump to 1955 but what was the other one?"

"Ian Fleming," Lucy answered as she tossed a teasing grin at Wyatt. "Wyatt is a big James Bond fan."

"Okay, but who doesn't love those movies?" Jiya asked with a shrug and a smile.

"Oh no," Lucy corrected her as she continued to grin at Wyatt. "There's books too and Wyatt has read them all. Multiple times."

"A good book is a good book," Wyatt said with a sheepish smile. "You know that better than any of us, Professor. I mean you've written three of them."

Lucy's grin fell for a brief moment before it widened into a curious smile. She tilted her head and gave him a questioning look. It was at that moment that he realized he'd unintentionally given himself away. Lucy had only ever told them about her book on Lincoln.

"Three?" Rufus asked in surprise. "Seriously? I thought you just wrote that one book on Lincoln?'

Her eyes never left Wyatt's as she answered Rufus. She looked surprised and flattered.

She smiled warmly as she spoke. "One on Lincoln, one on LBJ, and one on Washington. It was a series. Now, I'm just curious, Wyatt, how did you know about that? I've never mentioned it."

He grinned at her and then lifted one shoulder in attempt to look casual. "I may have googled you a couple of times, and...read all three of your books."

It was how he kept his sanity while she was missing. Her words brought her back to him, if only for a little while. He'd read those books over and over during those six awful weeks. He inadvertently memorized whole paragraphs, that's how much he read them. Maybe he should read them again while there was still so much distance between them. Was there a chance it could help him now too?

Lucy's eyebrows rose and she smiled brightly at him. It was a smile that reached her eyes and lately those were rare. "You read them?"

He nodded and decided to admit the truth. "Multiple times," he said as he intentionally repeated her words from earlier.

"Really?" She asked him as her cheeks began to color very slightly. The smile was still on her face and he could feel his heart beating faster as she focused her full attention on him.

"Really," he answered with a firm nod. "They're very good books, Lucy. Kinda made me wish I had a chance to watch you teach. Not that you don't teach Rufus and I something new every day," he added with a soft chuckle. "Just...I don't know, I'd like to watch you in your element with a group of students. Bet it's a sight to see."

She flashed her teeth at him in a brilliant smile before she shook her head with a self deprecating scoff. "Not enough of a sight to earn tenure, apparently."

"Yeah, well, what do a bunch of stuffed shirts know anyway?" Wyatt asked her. "Their loss."

This - this felt like how they used to be. Before he screwed it up. He missed how easy it used to be to talk to her. The fact that they were talking like this now gave him hope that they could get back to having that all the time eventually. It was possible.

"Stanford's loss was our gain," Rufus added with a nod. "Not sure what they were thinking, but I'm glad it freed you up for this job."

Lucy's smile dimmed slightly and she let out a hollow chuckle. "Yeah, I don't think I got this job on my merit, Rufus." She pointed to the letter and shook her head. "I suspected Ben Cahill pulled a few strings before but according to that it wasn't just him. It was all of the powers that be at Rittenhouse. Homeland Security didn't choose me because I was 'world class.' Maybe Christopher thought they did, but it's becoming clearer and clearer that my accomplishments had little to do with my getting this job."

"That doesn't mean your accomplishments mean any less," Wyatt reminded her.

"Right and screw Rittenhouse," Rufus told her with a shake of his head. "The bottom line is, no one would have signed off on hiring you, Rittenhouse or not, if you weren't qualified. If Christopher or her boss had thought you weren't up for the job they would have questioned it. No one did. Well," Rufus said as he pointed at Lucy. " _You_ did. But they didn't."

"You're brilliant, Lucy," Wyatt told her. "You impressed me from day one and I can't imagine anyone else doing this job as well as you."

Lucy glanced between both Rufus and Wyatt for a moment before her smile returned and her eyes misted over. He could tell the tears in her eyes were grateful as she spoke. "Thanks, guys."

"You are all so cute," Jiya said as she watched them with a wide smile. "I love watching best friends be best friends. Precious."

The three of them turned to Jiya with amused smirks.

"Glad we could keep you entertained," Rufus said as he pressed a quick kiss to the top of her head. "Even if you cheat at Monopoly."

"It's not cheating if you follow all the rules, which I am, thank you," Jiya said as she turned back to the game.

They went back to the game and Lucy went back to her letter, but he noticed her mood seemed much improved as she read. He hated watching her doubt herself. She didn't see what he saw. She didn't see the brilliant and brave woman that took on shadowy organizations and her own complicated family every day. She didn't see the fire and steel that he saw when they faced off against Keynes. She didn't know how truly important she was to everyone around her.

It was high time someone pointed that out to her and reminded her how irreplaceable she was. He was more than willing to be that someone anytime she needed it.


	3. Chapter 3

 

(3/?)

After those six weeks Lucy was with Rittenhouse, after they brought her home, she had no clothes of her own other than the one scratchy outfit from 1918. Wyatt had lent her a pair of his sweats once they finished debriefing Christopher on the mission. He was pretty sure Lucy found a way to burn the outfit from 1918 because it was never seen again. Not even in a trashcan. It was just gone.

But that started a trend. She borrowed his clothes for the first two weeks at least and he never seemed to get any of them back. Slowly, Agent Christopher would bring Lucy her own clothes but none of them were anything like what Lucy wore before the bunker. No sweaters and blazers or anything that looked at all like the professor she once was. Sometimes, even after she started to collect her own clothes she would borrow something from him. A hoodie or a flannel shirt. He never minded. She looked better in his clothes than he did anyway.

Even better than that, though, was that she seemed to like it. He knew. He could see it on her face any time she was wearing something of his. Something about her enjoying being in his clothes felt both emotionally intimate and...sexy. It hadn't helped any of their almost kisses and most certainly was a factor in the build up of tension that led to Hedy's guest house in 1941.

But almost as soon as it had started, he screwed it up and the morning after the Salem Fiasco, as he called it, he found all of his clothes that she had borrowed stacked in a neatly folded pile on his bed.

She found other clothes to borrow in addition to whatever Christopher managed to bring her and the things they stole that she kept. He knew she kept the dresses from 1941 but he never saw them again after... _everything_. He did notice she kept a few blouses from various time periods as their jumps went on. It made Lucy's wardrobe an eclectic mix of lounge wear, casual clothing, and period pieces.

Which made her laundry basket easy to spot in the laundry room. It also made it easy to figure out which night she preferred to do her laundry every week.

He _may_ have picked his own laundry night to match hers. He'd take all the time with Lucy he could get right now, even over laundry. So, Sunday became his regular laundry night. For the first three weeks, she didn't say much to him. Small talk, mostly, about their job and their friends and what they knew of the world outside the bunker. Nothing important, nothing too personal.

After having a moment of their old camaraderie back a couple of weeks ago being forced to return to small talk was torture. But he knew that none of this would magically fall back into place. He knew he was going to have to work for every bit of ground he gained. So, it was understandable, and he would keep chipping away with small talk every Sunday for as long as it took.

"So, Rufus thinks he may have figured out how to jump to a time where we exist without our brains...you know, imploding," Lucy said as she threw a load of whites into her washing machine.

"He _thinks_ he's figured it out?" Wyatt asked warily.

"Well, he hasn't tested it yet," she replied. "Though I'm not sure how he would test it without risking something terrible happening to the test subject."

"Do we really want to be able to do that, though?" His brow furrowed and he shook his head. "I feel like we screw around with time too much as it is. Do we really want to screw around with the years that directly affect us?"

"Well," Lucy said with a thoughtful look and a shrug. "If this whole mess is predestined then I suppose we have to figure it out or I can never go back and give the diary to Flynn. But then maybe we've already changed the future described in that diary too much? Maybe the diary is no longer relevant because future me went back and gave him the diary?"

"Have you read the diary?" Wyatt asked curiously.

"No, I don't want to," Lucy told him with a nervous glance.

"But what if it tells you how to get Amy back?"

"What if it doesn't?" Lucy asked him in return with a doubtful expression. "Honestly, I've been thinking about it a lot. I can't imagine I would go back in time to give someone a book that would change my present so drastically for anything less than a desperate situation. Giving Flynn the diary and seeking his help had to be a last resort and if it was a last resort then-"

"If it was a last resort then you think we were losing the battle," Wyatt said as he finished her thought for her.

"Yes." She swallowed thickly and started her machine. "I don't want to know the ending if it ends with Amy never coming back or with me losing anyone else. I don't want to know what's coming unless it's good and I can't be sure that anything in that diary ends well so I'd just rather not read it."

"Just because it's in that diary, Lucy, doesn't mean it's set in stone," Wyatt told her as he threw in his own whites to the second machine and closed the lid. He turned and leaned against the machine to face her. "If you don't like what you read, then change it."

"I don't think it's that easy," she told him with a shake of her head.

"Why not? You said it yourself, by Flynn even having that diary we may have changed the future so much that it's not relevant, right? So why isn't it that easy?"

"Because who's to say knowing what's in that diary and trying to avoid it wouldn't make things worse? And even at that, once I know it will always be there in the back of my mind. It could influence my decisions without me even knowing it. No, it's safer to just keep going as we always have."

He shook his head as he considered her words and ran a hand over his face tiredly. "This conversation is giving me a headache."

Lucy chuckled. "Me too."

The dryer next to Lucy buzzed and she turned to pull her load of colors out of the machine. She got to work folding and putting the items back into her basket when he spotted something familiar. A flannel shirt. A blue flannel shirt. One that he was pretty sure he let her borrow at some point. But didn't she give back all of his shirts?

He looked away from her and covered his mouth with his hand so she wouldn't see his grin. He really shouldn't be grinning. So she kept one shirt? What did that really mean? It certainly didn't resolve their issues or indicate he had gained back her trust. It was just a shirt.

But he couldn't help but think it was a hopeful sign, whether she intended it to be or not.

He just wasn't exactly sure what he was supposed to do with that information.

"You know," Lucy said as she folded his blue flannel shirt. She wasn't even trying to hide it. What did that mean? "You didn't used to do your laundry on Sunday nights."

He froze and swallowed thickly. "I, um, never really had a set night before." That wasn't a lie. He did laundry whenever it was necessary and not on a specific night each week.

She looked up from folding the shirt to meet his eyes. "Interesting. But you have a set night now?"

She knew. She definitely knew.

"Well, I-" He cut off his own sentence as he tried to choose his words carefully. He tried to think of any way to state the truth that didn't indicate how truly desperate he was to talk to her but none of the sentences he put together in his head felt right. So after a prolonged silence he decided to go with the truth. "I wanted to spend time with you, and I thought this would be a low pressure way to just...be _around you_. To talk to you."

She didn't smile at first, didn't react at all really. She bit the inside of her lip and held his gaze for a long tense moment before the corners of her mouth twitched upward and spread into an affectionate smile. Her eyes crinkled at the corners as the smile grew. Her smile was so beautiful. His chest ached at the sight of it.

God, he wanted to kiss her. He so badly wanted to kiss her. To hold her, to touch her. Anything.

He shoved his hands into his pockets and forced himself to look away from her blinding smile before he did something she wasn't ready for. He looked back up and pointedly avoided her eyes or her smile.

"You started doing laundry on Sunday nights just to talk to me?" Lucy asked.

He nodded. "I did, yeah."

"Okay," she said with a warm smile.

He was about to ask her to clarify that "okay" when she unfolded the flannel shirt and slipped her bare arms in the sleeves. He gulped and scratched the back of his neck nervously. "You, um-are you cold?"

She smirked at him and shrugged. "Not really."

He stared at her in stunned silence for a moment as he tried to find a response. Any response. Any at all. But no words came to him. He couldn't be mistaken about the flirty look in her eyes as she smirked at him. But she hadn't flirted with him in so long. She hadn't gone there and so neither had he. He had to be wrong.

The dryer next to his washing machine buzzed as Lucy picked up her laundry basket and breezed passed him.

"Your colors are dry," she told him. She turned to face him as she reached the door and grinned. "Do you mind letting me know when my whites are done in the washer?"

He shook his head. When he spoke his voice cracked just slightly. "No, I don't mind."

"Great," she said with a soft smile. "And Wyatt?" He met her eyes again and found them just as soft as her smile. "Thank you," she said as her smile and gaze turned shy. "I really appreciate it."

He got the distinct impression that she was thanking him for more than just watching her load of whites. He smiled bashfully at her and shrugged.

"Anything for you, Lucy."

She took a deep breath and let out a contented sigh before nodding and leaving the room.

Once he was alone he was finally able to process what had just happened. Lucy Preston flirted with him by putting on _his_ shirt. Right in front of him and then she smirked at him after like she knew exactly what she was doing to him.

Maybe, he thought. Maybe she was finally starting to believe in him again. Maybe she was starting to trust that he really would do _anything_ for her.

Like pick a set laundry night for the sake of being near her, for instance.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Inspired by 2x04 and Fangirlish's review of the episode. That review discussed an angle of the lyatt drama I hadn't considered before. If you haven't seen the latest episode then I wouldn't read this.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> angellwings

 

(4/?)

Lucy was wearing a sleeveless blouse today. It was warm in the bunker due to the ridiculous temperature outside so the sleeveless blouse wasn't unusual. He didn't have any issue with that. No, his issue was the scar on her arm. The one that was barely visible from the knife wound she received during Salem. Even the scar itself didn't bother him. It was the emotions the scar represented.

The reminder of the beginning of their unraveling.

They were alone in the common space. Lucy had a laptop across her thighs and he supposed she was researching something to do with Carol's letter because she had scans of the letter up on the screen.

He shouldn't even be thinking of bringing up anything regarding Jessica and Salem. He knew. He was on shaky ground as it was.

But there were things about that situation that had always bothered him. He let them go at the time because he knew he had no right to be pissed at anyone. He broke out of the bunker, he ran off without a word, he brought Jessica back without a thought to anyone else. He broke every rule. So he had no right to demand any answers from Lucy or the team.

But the questions still lingered. He never asked them.

He knew asking them now would risk losing every bit of goodwill he had gained back, but they were alone now. When else would he have a chance to ask? Plus, things had been good between them lately. Things were friendly and encouraging. Maybe she would be more open to talking.

His eyes drifted to her scar again and he sighed as his internal debate continued. He wasn't even pretending to read the mission reports he was supposed to be reviewing anymore. There was really no point.

"What?" Lucy asked with a huff without even once glancing away from the laptop screen. "You've been alternating between staring at me and staring at the coffee table for the last ten minutes. What are you wanting to talk about?"

He kept staring and waited her her to look over at him. If she really wanted to know then he was only going to do this while he had her undivided attention. Finally, she turned her head and caught his eye.

"During that initial phone call, when Jessica...resurfaced." He paused and gulped nervously. "Why did you lie to me?"

She looked as though someone had slapped her. She took a quick paranoid glance around the common area to check for prying eyes. He could hear the sounds of Rufus, Jiya, and Mason working on the Lifeboat and the sound of Agent Christopher on her phone in the hallway behind them, but there was no one in the room with them. Still that didn't seem like enough for Lucy because she set aside the laptop, stood from the couch, and then motioned for him to follow her.

He stayed close behind her as they headed into the bathroom and he watched as she shut the door and then moved the chair into place. He remembered doing the same thing with Jessica when he first brought her to the bunker. The significance of that was not lost on him.

Lucy did not look pleased with him and he felt like he needed to explain his question.

"It's not that I want any excuses to deflect blame," he told her. "I don't. I made very obvious mistakes. I'm still owning that completely. But why didn't you just tell me the Mothership jumped? Or why not just tell me how you really felt about Jessica being back? Why not tell me?"

The anger in her eyes faded and it was replaced with uncertainty and regret. She turned to face the sink. She braced herself on the white porcelain and only met his eyes again through the bathroom mirror.

"Do you really want to talk about this?" She asked. "Now?"

"Only if you want to," he answered softly. "You don't owe me any explanations but...it would help to know them."

She sighed and shook her head. "No, Wyatt, I think you're wrong about that. I think I do owe you an explanation. I didn't let you make certain choices for yourself. I should have, but I didn't."

"Why, though?" He asked. "Why didn't you tell me about the Mothership or...God, Lucy, why were you so quick to dismiss what we had? I mean I brought it up but you-you acted like you were so fine with all of it."

He was trying to tread lightly. He kept any and all accusatory tone out of his voice. He wasn't accusing her. He would never do that. But he always wondered why she didn't fight him on it. She immediately caved. It was wrong of him to think it or want it, but in that moment in that hotel room, a part of him had wanted reassurance that the idea of letting go of 1941 hurt her as much as it hurt him. He wanted an indication that some part of her was as tortured as he was over the loss of what they'd found in each other.

The situation still would have been messy. He knew that. Her admitting to her heartbreak would have changed things in a very minor way, but maybe they could have navigated it quicker if he heard it straight from her from the very beginning. It was a thin 'maybe', but he felt it nonetheless.

"It took you two seconds to say 'Jessica's alive' and in that same amount of time I had to muster up a reaction," Lucy said with a thoughtful frown. "I thought my logic was sound and that I was doing the best thing for both of us. I-I thought a clean break would be what you wanted and I thought it would keep me from falling apart. Besides…"

She trailed off and closed her eyes like she didn't want to continue, and he got the impression she was about to reveal something she never let herself say out loud.

"Besides?" He asked in an encouraging tone.

"Besides," she said as she took a deep breath and swallowed thickly. He watched her carefully as she turned to face him. Every bit of her movement felt heavy and forced as if she wanted to do anything but look at him. But she did. Her sorrowful tearful eyes met his and before she even spoke he felt his eyes matching hers. "How could I compete with a ghost?"

There it was. His throat felt dry and his eyes stung at the idea of Jessica not just haunting him but Lucy as well. He'd put Jessica on pedestal. She told him that once but he didn't listen. He never really listened to Jessica like he should have. But he put her on so high of a pedestal that it affected how Lucy perceived her value in his life.

She must have taken his silence as concern or expectation, he wasn't sure which, because she kept going.

"You told me how you felt about her numerous times and I knew better than most how desperately you wanted her back. You carried around so much guilt over her death, Wyatt. You tortured yourself for years over losing her. Not only that, but…" Lucy shook her head and turned back to face the mirror. Her eyes didn't find his in the reflection this time. She seemed focused on herself. "She loved you first. She knew you first. She was your wife. I was just...a friend when you really needed it. I had no right to make any demands on you, even if a part of me really wanted to."

So she had wanted to? Some part of her thought about fighting for him?

"Lucy," he said before taking a long slow breath. His eyes were still watering and his heart felt like it was shattering for her all over again. "You're more than just a friend. You've never once been just a friend. After everything we went through, you had earned enough of my trust and my affection to say something. At no point did I even once shrug off what you and I had as something as simple as friendship."

"Really?" She asked in flippant disbelief. "Are you sure about that? You sure you wouldn't have resented me for it if I said something then and that had some effect on how hard you tried to fix things with Jessica? And don't say it wouldn't have. You wouldn't have given it your best shot and things would have fallen apart for you and her faster than they did and you'd have no one to blame but me. And if you blamed me then there would never have been any hope of-"

Her tone had been frantic and resentful but she'd stopped short of finishing her last sentence. He thought he knew where she was going with it though. He thought he understood.

"In a later conversation, you told me you didn't want to be the reason things ended with Jessica," Wyatt said he watched her reflection in the mirror. She was still refusing to look at him. "Lucy, was that because you were afraid I'd blame you for my marriage to Jessica failing? That I would resent you for it and then you would lose me? Was that it?"

She turned to face him then and her sad brown eyes met his earnest ones. "If it didn't work out then I still wanted there to be some small hope that we could find our way back to each other and I couldn't see that happening if I had, even inadvertently, come between you and Jessica."

There was a prolonged moment of silence that fell between them. It had a sense of resolution to it, closure. It felt like the distance between them shortened by a considerable margin. It also felt like hope. Lucy said herself, she wanted there to be hope that they could find each other again. Even when she was pushing him away, she wanted to believe it might work out in the end. If she felt that way then, when things were bleakest, then a part of her had to feel that way now. It encouraged him more than she realized.

"I also just wanted you to be happy, Wyatt," Lucy said softly after the silence had gone on for several minutes. "And I thought Jessica would make you happy. I still want you to be happy. That hasn't changed."

He smiled warmly at her and dared to reach for her hand. He held it in his own and laced their fingers together before he spoke. "As long as I'm with you then...I am. Being here with you makes me happy. You make me happy."

He saw the corner of her mouth tug upward very slightly, but it never gave way to a full smile.

"Was there anything else you wanted to know about that day?" She asked as she released his hand and took a step back from him.

One step forward, two steps back.

"No," he said with a tired sigh. "That was it."

"Okay," she said with a gulp and a nod. "Then I, um, need to get back to work."

"Right, Yeah," he said as he tried to cover his disappointment with a small smile. "Of course."

He moved the chair and stepped aside to allow her to leave. She rushed out of the bathroom, but in the opposite direction of the common area. He had a feeling he wouldn't be seeing her for a few hours, at least.

He fought the instinct to go after her. The fact was, that wasn't what she needed just then. Not from him.

He'd seen to that the minute he brought Jessica into the bunker all those months ago. He had no one to blame but himself.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: so this story has me conflicted. Because part of me wants to wait for more canon drama that I can flesh out and then the other part of me wants to write this furiously in case canon totally swerves in an unexpected direction LOL. So, yeah, I don't know. I guess I'll just keep writing the moments I have in mind and if canon fits what I'm doing here I'll include it.  
> Happy reading!  
> Angellwings

Wyatt wasn't sure when he started his current routine. It was sometime after Christopher kept him from jumping so they could raid Rittenhouse, he knew that much. That was the first time he found Lucy asleep on the couch with a tablet hugged to her chest. She stayed up, even after Christopher told her not to, to review the new evidence. That night he remembered telling himself to walk away. To go find Jessica. But he couldn't.

She looked so uncomfortable. Her head was resting on the armrest, which wasn't cushioned, and her jeans and blouse didn't look nearly warm enough for the temperature in the room. He remembered thinking earlier that she looked beautiful. In her new clothes she looked more like herself than she had since before Rittenhouse took her.

But a part of him, the same part of him that couldn't walk away from her, wished she was still parading around in his borrowed clothes.

He hadn't yet realized why he was such a conflicted disaster over Lucy so the reason for wishing that escaped him and left him with a guilty stomach ache.

The stomach ache didn't stop him from taking care of Lucy that night, though. He'd gone to her room and grabbed her pillow and a spare blanket, removed the tablet from her hands to place it on the coffee table, and then situated her more comfortably on the couch. The pillow went under her head and the blanket was tucked around her. He watched her sleep for a few fleeting minutes. He told himself he was watching to make sure he hadn't woken her, but really it was because he knew it was the only time he could stare at her so openly.

Late at night, in the darkness of the silo, was the only time he could really take her in.

He eventually forced himself to walk away, but it hadn't been easy.

The next morning he was in the kitchen, after a horrible restless night of sleep, just as she was waking up. He made her a cup of coffee, the way he knew she liked it, and left it on the coffee table while she was still half asleep. He walked briskly away from her before she managed to process just who left her the coffee. He wasn't sure where he stood with her then.

He was only just slightly more sure of where he stood now, but this routine remained. He wouldn't go to bed until she did and he would make sure to wake up before her too. Most nights, she went to her own bed. But since Carol's letter, her nights on the couch had become more frequent. He always made sure she was comfortable before heading to his own room and he always made sure he was in the kitchen when she woke up.

Last night he found her with the physical copy of the letter clutched to her chest and it hadn't taken him long to realize that in this instance she had not fallen asleep doing research. There were dried tear stains on her face and a box of tissues on the floor. He carefully removed the letter from her grip and then put it and the tissues on the coffee table. He left to get her pillow and blanket and then gently tucked the pillow under head before cocooning her in the blanket.

He brushed a stray hair out of her face and resisted the urge to kiss her forehead. He pulled his hand back and fisted it. He couldn't just _do_ that. Lucy had to be the one to initiate anything. He forced himself to leave after that. He didn't stay and watch over her that night, even for a few minutes. He wasn't sure he could trust himself to not cross his self imposed boundary.

The next morning while he was in the kitchen, he heard her start to stir. He fixed her coffee and was all set to leave it and bail out when her delicate hand suddenly grabbed his wrist.

He didn't even know she was awake.

"So, it was you," Lucy announced.

He swallowed and then reluctantly met her eyes. She looked amused, unsurprised, and yet still...a little sad. He nodded in response and smirked at her.

"Since that night you raided Rittenhouse? Even then?" She asked as she released his wrist. He immediately missed the feeling of her skin on his.

"Guilty as charged," he said with a small nervous smile. He wasn't at all sure what to expect from her with this news so he waited. All the while holding his breath.

Her lips quirked to one side in a crooked smile and he wondered briefly if it at all mirrored the one he knew he wore too frequently. It looked very inviting on her, he knew that for sure.

She shook her head at him and chuckled. "You are...ridiculous."

"Me?" He asked teasingly. "I'm not the one who keeps falling asleep on the most uncomfortable couch that time and the government forgot."

She blushed and shrugged with a guilty expression. "I never do it on purpose."

He smirked and laughed softly. "Yeah, but you know the odds when you stay up like that."

She sat up and took the cup of coffee off of the table. She met his eyes and then pointedly glanced at the empty space next to her on the couch, giving him permission to join her. He was surprised but he wasn't going to give her a chance to change her mind.

"I like the bunker in the middle of the night," she admitted. "It's quiet and peaceful. It makes it easier to focus."

"Until you fall asleep," he told her with a grin.

She chuckled and nodded. "Until I fall asleep," she agreed. She peered over her coffee cup at the letter that was neatly folded on the table and let out a sad sigh. "Though, last night wasn't really about focus," she told him. "It was more about privacy."

He gave her a curious look and waited to see if she would continue. She didn't disappoint.

"Yesterday would have been my mom and dad's anniversary," she stated with a weak smile. "Dad used to make such a big deal out of it. He would actually leave the house and then come back to knock on the door and ' _properly'_ pick my mom up for dinner." She bit her bottom lip and laughed quietly. "Mom would tease him about it but we all knew she loved it."

"I think I would have liked your dad," Wyatt told her with a grin.

"Everybody did," Lucy said with a nostalgic sigh. "Well, everybody in our original timeline." She leaned forward and picked up the letter before she waved it at him. "I don't know why I thought reading this letter would be a good thing to do on their anniversary. This Carol was not the woman who raised me. She was definitely not the woman who married Henry Wallace." Lucy rubbed at her tear stained cheeks with her sleeves before she continued. "All that letter did was remind me of how different my memories are from this reality. This Carol never knew a love like my mom and Henry's or if she did, it didn't stick."

Wyatt watched Lucy thoughtfully for a moment. Her talk of Carol Preston not being her real mother and then the way she described Henry made him wonder.

"What if that's the difference then?" Wyatt asked. "What if the difference between your mother and Carol Preston is Henry Wallace."

"You mean, like, what if he changed her?" Lucy asked him with a furrowed brow.

Wyatt met her eyes and nodded just slightly. "What if he saved her? It's possible if it's a really exceptional love. The _true_ kind."

They both knew he wasn't just talking about Carol and Henry at this point. He was speaking from experience. He was talking about the two of them. Lucy didn't look away from him like he expected her to - like she always did when he brought up the fact he loved her. No, she held his gaze.

"Maybe," Wyatt continued. "Henry gave your mother something _good_ to fight for. The way she fought for you in the end."

Lucy's eyes began to water as she considered his words and he heard the tell-tale sniffle of tears. He picked the tissue box up from the coffee table and placed it between them on the couch. Just in case.

"Damn Hindenburg," Lucy muttered with a watery chuckle. "If that's the case then the Hindenburg changed my life for the worse in one fell swoop."

"I said it to you then and I'll say it to you now," Wyatt said as he pulled a tissue out of the box and offered it to her. "We're gonna fix it, Lucy. We're going to fix everything. Henry, Amy, your mom. We'll get it all back just the way it was."

There was a moment of tense silence. What kind of tension it was, he wasn't sure. But in the next moment, Lucy's words knocked him for a loop.

"Hopefully not _just_ the way it was," she said as she took the tissue from his hand. "Because _just_ the way it was means I wouldn't have you." She paused but then, as he caught her eye, she added hastily, "or Rufus."

"Right, Rufus," he said with a knowing smirk.

She rolled her eyes at him playfully. "Stop looking so smug."

"Hard not to look smug," Wyatt said with a full genuine smile. "Not when you just admitted that you want to keep me around."

" _Wanting_ to keep you around has never been the issue, Wyatt," she said softly as she looked away from him. She studied the caramel colored beverage in her mug and didn't dare turn her eyes anywhere near him. She was so adamantly ignoring him that he wondered if she'd said it at all or if he'd imagined it. But she kept on, just as softly, and he knew he hadn't. "It was needing to push you away that hurt us."

"You don't need to push me away anymore, Lucy," he reminded her as he swallowed thickly. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

She sighed and it sounded completely conflicted. She sounded tired and torn when she replied, "Thing is, Wyatt, I've heard that before."

The words ' _you haven't lost me'_ echoed in his head like he knew they echoed in hers and he felt himself grimace. It stung, but she had a point.

"I get it," he said as he closed his eyes tight and swallowed back his regrets. "I would doubt me too if I were you. But I'm here for good. I'm not leaving your side even if you never let me back in. I'll still be here covering you up with a blanket when you fall asleep on the couch and leaving coffee for you the next morning. I want _you_ , I want _us_ , and if this is all you can ever give me then I'll gladly take it. I know I've promised you something similar before but this time I'm proving it, every day, little by little, for however long it takes."

Lucy nodded slowly and then faced him with a small smile that was equal parts hopeful and hopeless. How she could manage both at one time was a complete mystery to him. She wiped at her eyes with the tissue in her hand before she reached for him and took his hand in hers. He didn't dare move or blink. He was afraid he might spook her if he did. She laced their fingers together and then squeezed.

"Good," she replied. "Don't give up on me, okay? Keep trying?"

"Till my dying day, ma'am," he promised.

Her teary gaze bore into his and he could see her still begging him for reassurance. So, he allowed himself to cross the boundary he set for them. He brought her hand, that he now held in his own, to his lips and softly kissed the back of it with closed eyes. When he was done he placed their hands back on the sofa between them.

She didn't retreat or run away afterward like he assumed she would.

No, she surprised him yet again. In the quiet early morning, she let him hold her hand while she slowly sipped her coffee. For some reason, he found this moment just as breathtaking as anything that had happened in Hollywood, 1941. She opened up to him. She asked him to keep trying. She _wanted him_ to win her back.

Like 1941, this would be a memory he would latch onto when he started to lose hope. He was already committing her tone and her words to memory as they sat there holding hands.

" _Don't give up on me, okay? Keep trying?"_

Wyatt Logan give up on Lucy Preston?

_Never._


	6. Chapter 6

"November 28th, 1966. New York City."

All eyes turned to Lucy as Jiya read the date and location aloud.

"Um, I don't know. It's two days after a smog event that likely killed 24 people," she paused and her brow furrowed.

Wyatt could see her wheels turning as she flipped through the impossible amount of information she had stored in her head. No matter how many missions they went on, her knowledge never stopped impressing him.

"Oh! Well, I don't know why Rittenhouse would care about this but-Truman Capote's Black and White Ball was that night. It was famous and very exclusive. Capote was at the height of his fame and everyone who was everyone was invited. It was an excessively extravagant masquerade ball. Tons of books have been written about it, you'd think it was a key piece of American history and not just a massive party."

Her last sentence sounded just the tiniest bit bitter and he gave her a small amused grin. She _would_ be upset that people cared more about this infamous ball than actual history.

"And everyone who's everyone means?" Rufus asked.

"Celebrities, socialites, politicians... _everyone_. From Frank Sinatra to the First Daughter, Lynda Bird Johnson. He invited 540 prominent public figures and all but maybe five showed up. There were dinner parties before the actual party hosted by a chosen few. For weeks milliners all over New York were flooded with requests for custom masks for the masquerade. The party nearly single handedly revived that profession. It was a cultural phenomenon akin to Beatlemania. After his party was over, masquerade balls became the trend across the United States," Lucy clarified. "It was declared by many as 'The Last Great Party' because of the expense and the wide range of guests."

Wyatt nodded and shrugged. "That's as good a place to start as any."

"Any idea how we're going to get in to this super exclusive party that we haven't been invited to?" Rufus asked as he looked pointedly between Wyatt and Lucy.

Lucy smirked and shared a good humored look with Wyatt before she answered. "We make it up as we go."

The jump and then subsequent shoplifting of formalwear was made slightly more difficult by having to locate masks for the masquerade portion of the party.

Lucy was absolutely stunning in the white gown she'd chosen. It had a bodice that featured a pattern of beads and crystals that resembled flowers with leaves embroidered in between. It was sleeveless with crystals focused around the collar and the waist. The crisp white skirt flared from underneath it in flowing pleats. She looked like she completely belonged in an extravagant and exclusive high society party.

The masks had taken longer to find but once they found them, Lucy's was the finishing touch to her look. His was just a plain black mask that covered the area around his eyes, eyebrows, cheeks, and nose. Lucy's covered the same area as his but in a more angled and elegant shape. The mask was white except around her eyes. The shapes around her eyes looked like two black swans facing each other.

The dress and the mask combined with her fair skin and dark hair caused her to look absolutely breathtaking. It took everything he had not to spend the whole mission staring at her.

The next step would be getting into the party. Wyatt thought this would be the hardest part of this mission. He would have bet good money that getting into the party would be their biggest challenge. He would have lost that bet.

Turned out, for Lucy, getting into the party was surprisingly easy.

Lucy seemed to think the party being so talked about was ridiculous before they left but now that they were here she knew an awful lot about it. He wondered if she had read one of those books she seemed so bitter about earlier.

She found her way into Babe Paley's good graces. She led them to Mrs. Paley's door as she prepared for the dinner party Capote trusted her to host. Lucy claimed they were on their way to the Plaza when their car suffered a flat and asked if they could use her phone.

Wyatt wasn't sure exactly how useful Mrs. Paley would be but he trusted Lucy. He trusted her leadership. Later, Lucy revealed that Babe Paley was Capote's closest friend and the only person who actually knew how to get in touch with him at any given moment. Paley was a fashion icon and a socialite and one of the group that was known as Capote's "swans." A collection of women who Capote saw as shining examples of young, smart, and fashionable.

Lucy charmed Paley completely. Wyatt didn't do a thing. He just sat back and watched the show. It was his favorite kind of show. Lucy was charming in every time period. He saw that up close and personal every time they jumped.

Babe Paley had also taken a liking to Rufus and had introduced him to another "swan", Lee Radziwell. Lee latched onto Rufus immediately. Wyatt chuckled as he watched Rufus fumble his way through interactions with two attractive women at once.

"Should I tell him that Lee is JFK's sister in law?" Lucy asked Wyatt with a smirk. "Would that help or hurt, do you think?"

"I wouldn't," Wyatt said as he laughed lightly at her mischievous expression.

Babe disappeared to make a phone call (Lucy assumed to Capote himself) and then, when she returned, she invited the three of them to join their dinner party. She stated they would give them a ride to the Plaza afterward.

And just like that, they were in. Thanks to Lucy.

The party that greeted them at the Plaza was unlike anything Wyatt had ever seen. It had 1941 Hollywood beat by a wide margin. Just the clothing on the other guest's alone was too opulent for his tastes. Luckily, they weren't there to join the party. He wouldn't have to pretend to understand this kind of expense. The money Truman Capote spent for this party could have done so many other things. Better things.

They couldn't find Emma anywhere nor did they see anyone who looked out of place amongst the guests, though the masks made that difficult. They split up to look. Wyatt stayed at Lucy's side and Rufus left to make a pass around the room.

At some point while they searched for Emma, in a most surreal series of circumstances, Wyatt and Lucy found themselves being pushed onto the dance floor by Frank Sinatra and Mia Farrow. Wyatt started to protest, thinking that Lucy wouldn't want to be forced into such close proximity, but Lucy didn't. She simply smirked at him and shrugged as they wound up shoved together on the crowded dance floor.

"When in Rome," she said with a chuckle. "One dance can't hurt."

Well, if she didn't mind then he certainly didn't. One arm went around her waist and the other held her hand in his and tucked them in between the two of them. He felt one of her arms go around his neck and he couldn't help but smile warmly at her as they began to sway to the music. Surely, he could enjoy this just for a moment. After all, Rufus was still out there looking for Emma. He would find them if they were needed.

He could feel her cheek barely brushing against his and he knew they were so close that all either one of them would have to do to initiate a kiss was turn their head. He didn't turn his head, no matter how much he wanted to.

"I haven't told you yet, Lucy," Wyatt said softly as he leaned closer to her ear. "But you look beautiful tonight."

"You don't look so bad yourself," she replied with a chuckle. "Black tie looks good on you, though I knew that already. The mask is a nice touch though." She leaned back to meet his eyes with a fond grin. "It brings out your eyes."

His eyes wandered her whole face. He wanted to take all of this in. They were in the middle of a mission but none of that mattered right now. "I feel like you pull off the masked look better than me," he told her.

Her mask made her look like something rare and exotic. Though, he supposed that's what she was. There wasn't another woman in all of history that could come close to Lucy Preston. Not to him.

Today, they felt more like the team they used to be than they had in several months. They would always trust each other with their lives while traveling. Nothing would ever change that, but today felt...lighter. There was a bit of playfulness between them now that he'd missed. Their friendship had been effortless before and it had been _so long_ since anything with them had truly been 'effortless.' She was opening up again, slowly. He could feel the progress they were making as they danced.

Her eyes flicked from his eyes to his lips and he felt a sudden thrill in his chest. He had been trying not to go there. He had been avoiding her lips. But now that she had started it, well, he couldn't resist. But he wasn't going to be the one to initiate it. Lucy would have to do that.

He did lean in, however. He brought his face as close to hers as he could. Their noses barely brushed as her eyes traveled his whole face, from his hairline down to his lips. She licked her lips and brought her eyes back to his. She wanted to kiss him. He could see it in her eyes.

Just as she was about to lean in and close the distance a hand landed on Wyatt's shoulder. Wyatt jumped and sucked in a started breath while tucking Lucy against his side protectively. He whipped around only to find a smirking Rufus waiting to talk to them.

"I found Emma," Rufus announced as he gave both Lucy and Wyatt a knowing amused look.

Wyatt almost suspected Rufus's bad timing was completely intentional.

"Where?" Lucy asked. She hadn't stepped out of his arms, Wyatt noticed. She was still tucked against his side.

"She seems to be stalking one of the guests," Rufus said as he turned and pointed to where he'd spotted Emma.

Sure enough, Emma's red head of hair could be seen watching a female party guest like a hawk. The guest she was watching was surrounded by men in black suits and black masks. Bodyguards of some kind, Wyatt thought.

Lucy gasped before she spoke. "Lynda Bird Johnson," she told them. "She's after the First Daughter."

"Wait, she's here for your standard kidnapping?" Wyatt asked in disappointment. "Really?"

"She could control LBJ or at the very least use Lynda's kidnapping to get him to step down," Lucy advised. "It's not her most creative plan but it would be effective."

"Then let's make sure that doesn't happen," Wyatt said with a decisive nod before he led both Rufus and Lucy through the crowd.

The dance was over and now it was time to get to work. Rittenhouse wouldn't blackmail the President of the United States and they certainly wouldn't kidnap an innocent woman. Not on their watch.

Eventually, they thwarted Emma and saved the day, granted with a few bumps and scrapes, and arrived back at the bunker in one piece. Lucy smiled tiredly at him as he helped her step out of the Lifeboat but said nothing. She disappeared to her room and then to the bathroom to change and shower.

The almost kiss was never acknowledged, but then Wyatt didn't need her to acknowledge it. They both knew what happened on that dance floor and that was good enough for now. Honestly, just the fact that they'd earned back some of their easy rapport was enough, the almost kiss was a bonus.

He would take any progress he could get and this jump was definitely progress.

"Hey, Wyatt?"

He turned, in surprise, from where he was making himself a sandwich to find Lucy standing at the edge of the kitchen. He assumed he wouldn't see her for the rest of the night. He didn't expect to hear anything else from her. He was glad to be wrong.

"Hey, Lucy?" He echoed with a playful smirk.

She chuckled and rolled her eyes at him. "I'm trying to be serious here, soldier."

"Right, sorry, let me try that again," he said with a grin. "Yes, ma'am? What can I help you with?"

Her smile turned soft at the sound of his 'ma'am' and she took a deep breath before she answered him. "I just...I just wanted to say thanks. For trusting me out there today. I know you didn't quite understand what I was doing with Babe Paley so it meant a lot that you went along with it."

"You never have to thank me for trusting you, Lucy," he told her. He wasn't sure why she was thanking him now, honestly.

"I know," she said as she shook her head and looked down at her hands nervously. "It's just with everything going on between us I could see how you might get a little resentful about that and I guess I just wanted you to know that your trust and your-your patience isn't lost on me. I know how hard this must be for you."

Resent her? For what? He was the one that hurt her. He had no right to be resentful about how she chose to heal. He had no right to be resentful period.

"I'm never going to resent you," he told her. She looked up at those words and he made sure to look her in the eyes as he continued. " _Never_. Not for protecting yourself and certainly not for taking the time you need to heal. I'm the one that hurt you. I deserve to have to grovel a little," he said with a self deprecating chuckle. "I'm okay with that."

Her brow furrowed and she shook her head at him. "But _how_ are you okay with that? I don't-I don't understand."

He held her gaze as he strode toward her and he didn't stop until there was only a few inches between them. He wanted her to get a good look at his face as he made his next statement.

"Because I love you, Lucy. I keep telling you that I would do _anything_ for you and I mean it. Anything for you, ma'am. I'll wait as long as you need me to."

He saw the hug coming a split second before she jumped. It gave him just enough time to brace himself for the impact.

Her arms wrapped around him tightly and she nestled her face into his neck. He swallowed thickly and held her just as tightly. His hands were on the base of neck and the small of her back. He closed his eyes and took in the feel of her against him. The way she fit, the way she clung to him, the way her hair caught in the stubble on his cheek, the faint coconut smell from her freshly shampooed hair. Everything about having her in his arms was perfect. This was how they were supposed to be. Every day they got a little closer to _this_.

She wasn't finished recovering yet. He knew that.

But she was _so_ close. He could feel it.

And knowing that moments like this were waiting for him on the other side of it was more than enough to keep him going.


	7. Chapter 7

In the last week alone, Lucy had let him hold her hand, dance with her, almost kiss her, and hug her. It felt like a progression. Growth. He thought they were on their way to more of those moments, but this week was a new week and apparently the physical distance between them was back with a vengeance. She wasn't avoiding him. Not really. She was just avoiding _touching_ him. She deliberately placed a buffer between them every time there might be a small chance of accidental touching. Currently that buffer was Flynn and he knew it too. He kept smirking at Wyatt.

They were trying to pass through a hostile area of Texas in November of 1835. It was four months before the Alamo but The Texas Revolution had already begun. The only wagon they could commandeer happened to be one that belonged to the town undertaker. They were reaching an area that was being heavily controlled by Mexican forces and they stopped to strategize how best to travel through it. Flynn dealt up close and personal with the Mexican government once before. (Enough to trap them in the Alamo and almost sentence them to death but Wyatt would save that to address later.) So he felt it was best if he drove and he did not feel it would be safe for either Lucy or Wyatt to be sitting, visibly, in the wagon.

"Rufus can pass as my 'family servant' as they called them in 1835 Texas--"

Rufus scowled. "I really hate traveling with you."

"The feeling is mutual, my friend," Flynn said dismissively before he continued on with his point. "But you two we'll have to hide."

"And where exactly would you hide us? It's an open uncovered wagon with an empty pine coffin in the--" Lucy stopped herself from finishing her sentence as Flynn smirked at her. Her eyebrows flew upward and she shook her head repeatedly. "No. Absolutely not."

"They won't search the coffin," Flynn said with a grin and a shrug. "But if you'd rather end up with bullet holes then suit yourselves."

"That box wouldn't fit two people anyway," Wyatt offered as he studied it. He knew Lucy would hate it but Flynn might have a point. It really _pained_ him to admit that, even to himself.

Rufus narrowed his eyes thoughtfully at the pine box and tilted his head. "Actually...if you turn on your sides I think it could. I mean you'd be a bit cramped but it's not like the two of you haven't been in a small tight space before, is it?"

Wyatt really could have done without the reminder of Old Rusty right now. It only succeeded in making Lucy _more_ hesitant.

"This is a nightmare," Lucy said with a thick swallow. "I mean a literal nightmare that I've had before." She turned to Wyatt with a sheepish smile before she added, "Without you in it, of course."

His eyes widened and he grinned in response. He actually assumed the nightmare included him, considering how she had been avoiding touching him this past week. He was relieved his assumption was wrong.

"So, what'll it be, kids?" Flynn asked. "The box or bullets? I'm happy either way."

It was no secret by now that Flynn liked a good bloodbath. Wyatt gave Lucy a questioning glance. It was up to her.

She deflated as she sighed. "The box. God, I hate this."

"I think time travel is trying to break you of your claustrophobia, ma'am," Wyatt added with a teasing smirk.

It did the trick. Her fearful face warmed slightly and a soft grin spread across her lips. "Well, I wish it good luck. I'm a piece of work."

Wyatt spread his long duster across the bottom of the box. From somewhere next to the wagon he heard Flynn scoff and pointedly ignored him. It wouldn't be much comfort but it was something. Wyatt was the bulkier of the two of them so he climbed in first. He turned toward the center of the box to accommodate the shape of the handmade coffin and then reached a hand out to help Lucy step in.

He could feel the nerves radiating off of her as she settled in next to him. He had a few nerves of his own if he were honest. The box had much less room than Wendell's trunk. They were nose to nose and chest to chest. The closest they'd been since 1941.

No, now was not the time to remember 1941.

Rufus put the lid on the coffin and the barest bit of light slipped through the cracks in the wood. Just enough to see Lucy's face. Her eyes were closed and he could hear and feel her focusing on her breathing. Her arms were practically pinned to her sides. He could tell she was tense from the way she seemed to pinch her shoulders inward.

"Hey," he said quietly. She opened her eyes and met his. Though, they were so close, where else was she going to look? "This is easy. You've been in worse spots than this."

"I wish it was just the small space that was getting to me," she told him with a wan smile. "But there's a bit more going on in my head than that."

He wanted to nod but he knew if he did they would knock heads. "Mine too," he replied honestly.

First and foremost was why she had been avoiding being within more than a foot of him this past week. But he didn't dare ask. Though, something in his answer must have indicated this based on her next response.

"I'm sorry for being so _odd_ the last few days," Lucy said with a nervous gulp. "I know you noticed."

"You don't have to apologize."

"Maybe I don't," she told him. "But I, at least, feel like I should explain."

"You don't have to but I will admit that I'm curious," Wyatt said hesitantly.

"It's just-old habits die hard," she said in a quiet emotional tone.

His brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"When Jessica was in the bunker, it took so much self control to not fall into our old patterns," she admitted reluctantly. "We were always so tactile, you and me. Breaking that was... _hard_ for me."

Now he knew where this was going, and he knew it was going to hurt.

"I had to remind myself over and over, 'he's married, he's married, he's married.' It was my mantra pretty much twenty-four seven," she told him as she took a deep fortifying breath to hold her tears at bay.

He could hear the tears in her voice still, though. She chuckled but it sounded like she was only doing it to keep from crying. He itched to reach for her and wrap his arms around her but given her current story he didn't.

"So, sometimes now, even knowing you ended things with Jessica, that mantra plays in my head. It won't go away. No matter how much a want it to."

He nodded very slightly, forgetting their closeness for a moment, and their noses brushed. He recoiled so quickly that he hit his head on the side of the coffin.

He winced. "Ow."

Lucy laughed quietly at him. "Are you okay?"

"I think so," he said with an embarrassed grin.

There was a moment of silence where Lucy just stared at him. Her eyes flicked between amused, guilty, heartbroken, affectionate, and then something much deeper that he was hesitant to name. He didn't want to get his hopes up if he was wrong about what he was seeing.

"Let me see," she said in a low whisper as she gently reached up and ran a hand through his hair.

He noticed how her hand shook as she reached for him. Her fingers massaged his scalp until she found the area that hit the coffin. She took longer than she needed to while finding it. Not that he minded. He sucked in a breath as her fingers trailed over the small bump that was forming there, not because it hurt, but because he was suddenly struck with a wave of longing so fierce that he had no idea what to do with himself.

He missed her. He missed _this._ And even though they barely had twenty four hours of intimacy, beyond casual touches, he missed _that_ too.

"Did that hurt?" She asked in concern.

"No," he replied instantly. "That definitely didn't hurt."

She understood his meaning. He saw the realization of it in her eyes. She let her hand rest on the back of his head as she spoke. "I think you'll live, Soldier. It's just a small bump."

And then her touch was gone. Her arm was pinned back to her side and the physical tension was present in her shoulders again. Right back to where they started. She met his eyes for a brief moment before looking away. He realized he hadn't really responded to her confession. Honestly, he didn't know how to respond because that confession left him feeling like...complete and total _shit_.

The wagon jumped suddenly and Wyatt instinctively grabbed Lucy around the waist to steady her as she jolted forward. He just barely prevented her forehead from smacking his.

"Sorry," he muttered as he immediately removed his hands from her waist.

He thought he wanted to know why Lucy kept her distance but now that he knew, he wished he didn't. He felt like an absolute jackass every time he touched her now. She still thought of him as married? He spent most of their initial missions together feeling like he was still married and emotionally cheating on Jess so he could relate. But the idea of him passing on that guilt to Lucy...

"I'm sorry," he repeated.

"You said that," Lucy said with a furrowed brow. "It's okay, Wyatt. We would probably both have cracked skulls if you hadn't done that."

"No, not for--" he sighed tiredly and met her eyes. Would there ever be a time when he wasn't apologizing to her? "I'm sorry that I made you feel like we can't touch anymore. I'm sorry that you see my marriage to Jess when you look at me. I'm sorry I brought her back to the bunker. I'm sorry I wore that damn wedding ring in front of you. I'm just-- _I'm just so goddamn sorry._ All the time. I--I ruined something that was so easy and so _good_." He laughed bitterly and looked away from her watery brown eyes. "Ruining good things seems to be what I'm best at."

Jessica. Lucy. Hell, even his dad's old Chevy. All good things that he turned bad.

"Stop. That's not true." Her voice sounded firm and scolding but he still avoided looking at her face. "Wyatt, look at me."

No, he wouldn't. He didn't deserve whatever she was about to say. He didn't deserve _her._

She huffed when he refused her request. He felt her soft hand under his chin. His eyes fell closed as she tilted his face upward to be even with hers. She was actually touching him and he couldn't even enjoy it. God, he was a stupid asshole.

"Wyatt," she pleaded. "Open your eyes. I want you to see my face when I say what I have to say next."

What could she say, exactly? That he had lost her forever? That they could never go back to how they were? No, if that was the case he would keep his eyes closed. That was all there was to it.

...until she pressed her forehead to his.

A moment later, he felt her hands frame his face and her thumbs lightly graze his cheeks. Her touches were light and gentle. He felt something clench in his chest and his determination to keep his eyes closed wavered.

"Open your eyes," she repeated in a commanding tone.

He swallowed thickly before opening his red rimmed eyes and meeting hers. Her pools of brown looked warm and sympathetic as she continued or press their foreheads together.

"We are not _ruined_ ," she told him as she held his gaze. "And while I do wish things had gone differently, I'm not completely indifferent to how _impossible_ your situation was. It's not like there's any sort of precedent for how to handle the complexities of timeline shifts. Trust me, I know. I came back to a totally different family and a fiancé I'd never met. It's heart wrenching and delicate."

She stopped for a moment, lifted her forehead from his, and ran a soothing hand through his hair before bringing it back to his cheek. All the while, her understanding gaze bore straight through him. "So, yes, while I wish things had been smoother or you had been more open with me early on, I'm actually _not_ sure there's any other way all of that could have played out."

She paused and took a shaky breath before she continued. She looked nervous but certain.

"You didn't ruin anything. It's all fixable. Not only that, but...you've been so wonderful ever since. You've been rebuilding _us_ from the ground up with very little help from me. There are still issues to work through but, and this is big for me, I _know_ we'll work through them. I know you'll be there for every bit of it. You've proven that to me throughout the last several weeks over and over again. I see you, Wyatt. I see everything you've done to earn back what we had. _I know_. So, trust me when I say...we are far from over or ruined or hopeless. As long as you believe in us, in _this_ ," she said as she pressed her forehead to his again and closed her eyes. "Then I'm going to keep working though all of it. _For you_. Okay?"

He stared at her tightly closed lids for a long moment and just marveled at her. He was supposed to be fighting for her and yet here she was again fighting for him. (Four months before the Alamo, in fact, when her hands had been on his cheeks desperately pleading with him then too.) She was resilient and astonishing and the damndest part was...

She didn't even know it.

"Okay," he agreed as he took a calming breath. He shouldn't have but he couldn't stop himself from following his statement with a lingering kiss to her forehead. "Anything for you, ma'am."

She chuckled at him. A genuine chuckle this time that didn't contain a single trace of tears.

"You really are going to keep saying that until I believe you, aren't you?" She asked in amusement.

"If I'm being honest," he told her with an affectionate grin. "I'll probably be saying it long after that too."

She opened her eyes and met his with a fond smile. "Your confidence is back, I see."

"Yeah, I wonder why that is?" He asked her teasingly.

She blushed and leaned back very slightly before averting her gaze. "Do you think we're almost there?" She asked.

He laughed softly at her abrupt change of topic. His mood was now considerably brighter. Amazing what a few words from his historian could do, he thought. She already told him not to give up on her but this time she let him in so much further. She wanted to love him. She believed in his ability to prove to her she _could_ love him. _She believed in him_. Every time he doubted himself, he would remember that from now on.

 _Lucy believed in him._ He could fix what was broken. He could earn the love he'd foolishly thrown away once before. He could do all of that because _she_ believed he could.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, so I know I promised a Habit of You update today BUT this story is effected by canon more than Habit is so I feel like I'm racing the clock a little bit to try and write what I have in mind for this because I just have this feeling that in the next two weeks or so canon is gonna swerve away from where I THINK it's heading (based on nothing other than the episodes we've seen so far) and I want to get in as much of this as I can before then. So Habit will not be updated today in lieu of working on this story.  
> This moment is a bit shorter than the others, but don't worry. All In Ch. 10 & 11 should make up for this one (and probably the next one) being on the short side. :)  
> Happy reading!  
> angellwings

Wyatt had always been a light sleeper. He made up for it by being able to sleep wherever and whenever he had a moment, but still every little sound usually woke him. So, when the sound of Lucy gasping for breath in her sleep hit his ears he bolted upright on the sofa.

They were forced to stay overnight in 1975. Rufus was asleep in the other double bed and Wyatt took the creaky worn sofa. He lost the coin toss.

Earlier in the day, Emma had nearly drowned Lucy. Both women had ended up falling into a swimming pool during a fight. Emma held Lucy under the water until Wyatt managed to reach them and wrench Emma off of her. Lucy was physically fine, but it was a close call. Too close for Wyatt's comfort, actually. Lucy had surfaced and gasped for air...

Much like she was doing now from the bed across the room from him. Her admission from World War II Germany about her car and the river with water coming in the windows suddenly sprang to mind and he was up like a shot. Faster than he thought possible, he was sitting on the edge of her bed, gently prodding her arm.

"Lucy," he said as he shook her arm. He shook her arm a little more forcefully when she didn't stir and continued to struggle to breathe. "Lucy."

She gasped as she woke, eyes opening wide looking frantic and wild. Her eyes found his as her hands found his shoulders. "Wyatt," she said in a relieved tone.

"Yeah, it's me," he assured her. "I'm here."

Her hands traveled from his shoulders to his neck and then they finally stopped on his cheeks. Her brown eyes bore into his as she searched for something to ground her. He knew then she'd had a nightmare of some kind, and it felt real. He kept his gaze focused intently on her, letting her find whatever she needed to in him.

Her breathing evened out and she ran one hand through his hair. Her hands through his hair always caused a reaction in him. An ache that he felt deep in the pit of his stomach. It took him back to a hand tracing circles on his arm as they laid in each other's arms tucked between soft sheets. To her warm smile as her nails softly scraped against his scalp, eyes full of possibilities and hope. It hurt and comforted all at once.

The way he closed his eyes and leaned toward her touch must have been the reaction she was looking for.

"You're real," she said with a relieved sigh.

"I'm real," he echoed. "You're awake."

The sadness and hopelessness that faded from her eyes made him realize something. Her dream wasn't about the accident. She asked about _him_. She wanted assurance that _he_ was real. That meant he was in whatever nightmare she had. Or if not in it then she had thought about him during it. He wondered then what else she could have a nightmare about that would be so vividly real and the only thing that came to mind was _Rittenhouse_.

She only talked about those six weeks with Rittenhouse one time. One long emotionally taxing night when the two of them had both been hurting from weeks of forced separation conflicting with the need to reach out and touch. When he finally couldn't take it any longer and forced her to talk about it. He had learned bits and pieces while at Rittenhouse headquarters and filling in the blanks would have killed him. So, he pushed her to give him the full picture - the full heart wrenching picture. She would never admit it, but she needed to say it out loud. She needed to verbalize her pain to someone and no one else knew her like he did. No one else was willing to push her the way he was. No one else would have understood.

What she told him that night - what she had been through - stayed with him but they never discussed it.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked. "Whatever it was you dreamed?"

"There's not much to tell," she muttered with a despondent shrug. "I was still at Rittenhouse and you were dead or I thought you were."

"Did you see the pictures again?" He asked worriedly.

Doctored pictures of their bodies to assure Lucy they were dead. She told him Rittenhouse used them and that they were burned in her memory. That she saw them when she closed her eyes.

It was a standard tactic in any interrogation or reprogramming attempt. The Army put him through a version of it for training purposes while they prepared him for special forces. It turned you inside out. You didn't know what was up or what was down. It made it easy for the other side to drill their beliefs into your head. The Army trained him to resist it. Lucy had no such training and yet she survived it. Granted, a little worse for wear, but she came out stronger. Forged in the fire.

Lucy nodded just barely in answer to his earlier question.

"None of that was real," he told her. "Rufus is here," he said as he motioned to the other bed and then smirked at her. "And snoring quietly." she chuckled weakly as he continued. " _I'm here_. We are real. Okay?"

"Okay," she said quietly.

"Are you alright?" He asked as she released his face and looked away from him.

"Fine," she answered.

They both knew that was a lie. But there wasn't much he could do unless she chose to confide in him. It had been a long time since she'd confided in him without him confronting her first. They rarely talked about anything serious anymore unless she was forced to or felt she had to. Based on the way she closed herself off just now he knew tonight wouldn't be any different. But he wasn't going to force the conversation. Not tonight. He was too exhausted, emotionally and physically.

He sighed and stood from the bed to go back to his creaky couch when her hand suddenly grabbed his.

"Wait," she pleaded. "Don't go."

So, he didn't. She asked. How could he refuse? She looked like she wanted to ask him something else too but she wasn't sure how.

"Could you...could you _not_ go back to the couch?" She finally asked. She hesitated and swallowed thickly before she clarified her question. "Could you _stay_ next to me, please?"

He stared at the empty side of the bed for a moment, unable to remember anything other than 1941, before he caught himself and took a deep rallying breath.

"Anything for you, ma'am," he said as he released her hand and walked around to the other side of the bed.

He didn't touch the covers. He laid down on top of them. He wouldn't be able take being in between bedsheets with her again, not without doing something stupid. He laid on his back and stared up at the ceiling with his arms at his sides. He would not reach out and touch her or pull her into his arms. _He would not._ He would maintain his boundary of respectful distance unless she--

She suddenly rolled toward him, interrupting his mental reminder to keep his distance, and slipped her hand in his. She threaded their fingers together and squeezed his hand.

"Thank you," she whispered.

She released his hand after that and then moved even closer. She rested her head on his shoulder and her hand on his chest, just over his heart, as if she were trying to remind herself he was alive and there with her. That small gesture was enough of a request to hold her. He didn't need her to say the words to know what she wanted. He moved his arm from in between them to wrap it around her shoulders and pull her closer.

"Go to sleep, Lucy," he said as he pressed his cheek to her hair. "I'm right here. Not going anywhere."

She nodded against his shoulder and closed her heavy lidded eyes. A minute later he heard her breathing deepen and felt her body relax against his.

He was left alone in the dark to wonder what exactly haunted her nightmares. He could imagine a million terrible scenarios or memories and each one felt like the twist of a knife in his gut. His arm tightened around her protectively and he focused on listening to her for any signs of restless sleep.

He wished she didn't have the kinds of memories that haunted and tortured, but there wasn't anything he could do to rid her of them. What he _could_ do was be by her side when or if those memories woke her. He couldn't protect her but he could support her.

Even if she never told him a damn thing about what went on in her head, he could be next to her -- comfort her. She deserved nothing less from him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm a crazy person. Updating this fic twice in one day on a day when no one reads or reviews fic LOL. But I just get so impatient. I finish something and I want you guys to see it right away! Gah. I'm a nerd.  
> Happy reading!  
> angellwings
> 
> PS - Also, shout out to **Iambeck** for her help on this! I love her! she's amazing!

He couldn't find Lucy. It was two in the morning and she hadn't gone to bed yet. He knew this because he always watched and waited for her to go to bed first before he finally went to sleep himself. Once two o'clock rolled around he set out to find her. The last room he had to search was the main silo that held the Lifeboat. He wasn't quite sure why she would be there at this hour, but it was all he had left.

He shouldn't have been surprised to find her stationed in front of the monitors, but he was. Her hair looked a bit wild as if she'd run her hands through it several times and her leg was bobbing up and down under the table. He noticed a large cup of coffee and Carol's letter on the table next to the keyboard.

On the table to her left was a stack of books he knew Christopher had located for her. They were books and records concerning family genealogy and then some on very specific time periods.

He assumed she was working on saving Amy. He had to assume because she never talked to him about it.

She never let him read a single word in that letter. Never clued him in on how Emma had made sure Amy couldn't come back and she never discussed her potential plans for fixing all of it. He had no idea how she was progressing when it came to saving Amy and she didn't seem to want to tell him.

He supposed that was part of the trust he was having to rebuild because while Amy had gotten tangled into their mission over time, she wasn't actually one of their objectives. He didn't need to know what was going on with Amy to do his job. So, Lucy didn't tell him.

And after everything he put her through, he couldn't blame her.

"You going to sleep anytime soon, Professor?" He asked as he stopped a few feet behind her chair.

He briefly caught a glimpse of charts and diagrams and a page of timeline mapping before she minimized all of it and turned to face him.

"I don't know about soon," she replied with a huff. "But eventually."

There were dark shadows under her eyes and he could see a bone deep exhaustion in her them too. Not physical, but emotional. He wondered how long she had been in front of this computer. He hadn't seen her since lunch but surely she hadn't been sitting here for twelve hours...

Had she?

"Have you been here all day?" He asked.

"The days we don't jump are rare," she told him. "I feel like I have to take advantage when they happen. It's been too long since I've been able to sit and work and I can't waste time anymore. I only have so much of it left." She sighed sadly and then turned back to the computer and muttered, "She's been gone too long as it is."

"Do you need help?" Wyatt offered.

"No, I just need to be left alone," she said harshly.

He felt her words like a slap, but he brushed them off quickly. She was tired and upset. Dwelling on Amy always left her feeling sullen and defeated. Her attitude while they hunted Jesse James was his very first indication of that and he'd seen it several times since.

"Lucy, if you've been here all day, don't you think you should take a break?" He asked. He was going to have to be extra patient with her right now. They were both stubborn but when it came to Amy, Lucy had a tendency to shut everything else out.

She laughed, but it was a horrible sound. Hollow and bitter and hopeless.

"Why not? It's not like there's a fate for Amy worse than not existing. Sure, I can take all the time in the world to figure it out. It's not as though she can feel anything or as if people who were never born have to suffer through any sort of afterlife, right? Yeah, okay, let's take a break," She swiveled her chair around to glare at him. "What should we do? Have a drink? Play a game? How about checkers? That's good for killing time, isn't it?" She was yelling now and he took a step back to give her space to vent.

Everything with Amy had to have been building for longer than he, or maybe even she, realized.

"How much of a break do you think I should take, exactly? Of course, what do you care? Rittenhouse gave you exactly what you wanted, didn't they?"

He grimaced and sucked in a sharp breath. As much as he wanted to, that one was harder to shrug off. He felt it like a shot to the heart. He lowered his gaze to the floor and closed his eyes.

The air shifted and he heard Lucy gasp. He knew then her own words finally hit her ears.

"Oh, God, Wyatt," Lucy said urgently as she crossed the room to him. "I-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean--s _hit--_ I didn't mean it."

Her voice sounded thick and her breathing was shallow. He heard a sniffle and then pulled his gaze up from the floor to look at her face.

"I'm so sorry," she repeated. "I don't know what I was-" she cut herself off and brought a hand to her mouth. She held it there for a moment as she swallowed back tears and then finally removed her hand to speak again. "That was _awful_ of me. You didn't deserve that."

He blinked back the tears in his own eyes with a self deprecating grin. "I don't know, I might have deserved that."

She shook her head at him and spoke firmly. "No, you didn't. It's just everything with Amy, it-it brings out the worst in me. I shouldn't take that out on you."

How could he be upset with her over that? For years, Jessica's death did the same thing to him. He understood that so well that he couldn't fault her for it.

He shrugged and shook his head. "It's fine."

"No, it's not," she said regretfully. "You were trying to help and I-"

"You told me to leave you alone and I didn't, Lucy. I should have taken the hint."

"Stop that," she said with a huff. "Stop making excuses for what just happened. Wyatt, I hurt you. I know I did. You were trying to be a good friend and I treated you unfairly. Amy or no Amy, that's unacceptable. I need you to tell me that. Please. Don't pull any punches or pretend what I did was in any way okay. _It wasn't._ "

He met her eyes and found her staring at him with a heated gaze. She wasn't angry, exactly, but there was definitely some resentment in her eyes. Why? Because he was shielding her from exactly how much her words had hurt?

"No, it wasn't," he admitted. "I didn't ask Rittenhouse to bring Jessica back, Lucy, and they definitely didn't do it out of the goodness of their hearts."

He heard the anger in his own voice. His tone was terse, clipped.

She nodded and sighed. "I know."

"They did it to hurt _us_. To distract me and weaken you. It wasn't a gift to me."

Her eyes widened as her apologetic look turned curious. "That's why you think they did it?"

They had never really talked about _why_. He knew why and he guessed Lucy had her thoughts on it, but they never discussed it.

"That's what makes the most sense," he told her as he lifted one shoulder carelessly.

"To distract you from what?" Lucy asked.

He quirked a brow at her and gave her an incredulous look. She really didn't know? "From _you_ , Lucy. We make a pretty good team, a formidable one even. Not only that but it's _my job_ to protect you. During those weeks with Jessica I wasn't working to the best of my abilities. I mean, Salem alone could have ended with you-" he paused and squeezed his eyes shut as he forced away old guilt. "It left us vulnerable, is what I'm trying to say. Why do _you_ think they did it?"

"Well, I-I thought they they were trying to take my reasons to fight. I thought Emma hoped I would give up if she took enough away from me. First Amy and then... _you._ I don't know, I just thought she was trying to break me," Lucy told him. "I didn't think about it weakening you and me as a-a unit, I suppose."

"They succeeded if that was their goal," Wyatt said with sad shake of his head.

"Temporarily, maybe," Lucy said as she made sure to catch his gaze. "But maybe in the long run, they'll have done us a favor."

"How would that possibly have been a favor?" Wyatt asked her with a furrowed brow.

"Well," Lucy said reluctantly with a light blush. "It forced you to figure out how you really felt about me, didn't it? You got closure on all your guilt. You got a chance to let go of some of your baggage and you--you know what you want now. Don't you?"

He couldn't help but smirk at that. She was asking a question but he didn't actually hear any doubt in her tone. _Progress_. "Oh, I know _exactly_ what I want. The future that I want is very clear to me. And, yeah, for the first time in my life the past is _actually_ in the past."

"So, there you go," Lucy said with a bashful smile. "A favor."

"When you look at it like that," Wyatt said with a small smile. "Then I guess so. But I don't plan to thank them anytime soon."

Lucy chuckled and nodded. "Me neither."

Lucy sighed tiredly as she glanced back up at the computers and her books and then back at him.

"So, you know, I think you're right," she admitted sheepishly. "I probably need a break."

"First of all, You think?" Wyatt asked with a teasing grin. "Second, I'm sorry, what was that? I'm _what_?"

"You heard me," she said with a playful roll of her eyes.

"No, I don't think I did. You think I'm what?" He asked he with a crooked smile.

"Will you stop looking so smug?" Lucy asked as she smacked his shoulder. "You keep this up and I'll never give you credit for being _right_ again."

He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and opened his camera app. "Hold on just one more time, I wanna get a video-"

" _Wyatt_ ," Lucy said with a half hearted glare. She followed it with a laugh and shake of her head.

"Fine," he said with a grin. "We'll keep it between us, boss."

"Boss, huh?" She asked. She chuckled and then smirked at him. "I like that."

"Thought you might," he replied.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a doozy! I actually had this partially written before the last two updates but it quickly spiraled into more intense territory than I planned. It felt out of place where I planned to put it so I wrote those last two moments purely as build up for this. I wanna thank **Iambeck** for her advice on this! She really helped me set a tone and keep the pace I've working on. She's the best. Anyway, be prepared for feels cause I'm gonna be honest, pals, I hurt myself a little with this one.  
>  Happy reading!  
> angellwings
> 
> PS - a couple of **spoilers for 2x05** are mentioned in this chapter. If you haven't seen last night's episode you may want to come back to this after you've watched it.

He was in the middle of an uneventful day. No mission, no violence, no need for the gun tucked in the waistband of his jeans. No, instead he was reviewing mission reports with Agent Christopher, going over every detail to try and find a lead.

It was boring as hell.

He looked up from the stack of folders toward the door, longing for an escape, when he spotted Lucy pacing anxiously in front of the doorway. She held Carol's letter in one fisted hand, crumpling it more than she should, and the palm of her other hand seemed tightly fused to her lips. She carried herself with rigid tense posture as she stalked back and forth.

What the hell? Lucy wasn't one to pace. That was _his_ job. His brow furrowed at her before he turned his gaze to Agent Christopher. She noticed too. She in turn gave him a curious look and he shrugged. They both watched Lucy pace for a few more moments before she finally burst through the door.

"I-I need to talk to you," Lucy said with a nervous gulp as she faced Wyatt. She didn't look him in the eyes, though. She seemed pretty focused on the folder in his hands instead.

"Me?" He asked in shock. She hadn't actually sought him out to talk in months. Usually their talks just happened. But she hadn't come to him with the need to talk since...since before Jessica.

"Yes, you," she said with a deep breath as she finally met his eyes. They were red rimmed and glossy and he knew whatever she needed to talk about was serious.

"I-yeah, okay," he answered. His words were stilted and stuttered. He was touched and worried and surprised all at once. He was lucky he was able to form a response at all.

"Wyatt," Agent Christopher said with a reluctant sigh. "We're not done here."

Wyatt nodded, but slid the pile of folders assigned to him back over to her. "We are for now," he said firmly. "The reports aren't going anywhere and, in case you haven't noticed," he told her as he motioned to the bunker around them. "Neither am I."

Agent Christopher shook her head with a resigned expression before she waved Wyatt and Lucy away. "Fine, go."

Wyatt gave the Agent an apologetic smile before leading Lucy out of the room with a hand on the small of her back. She didn't pull away or tense at the touch and Wyatt felt a small victorious thrill.

"Sorry," Lucy said with a thick swallow and shaky exhale. "I just...I was thinking and started to get upset and I panicked a little bit and I suddenly wanted-" she paused, bit her bottom lip, and then met his eyes again. "I wanted to talk it out with you."

He was stunned. This was one of those moments that on the outside looked small but, knowing their history, was actually huge. She started to spiral headfirst into her emotions but stopped to _find him._ She lost control of her thoughts and _wanted_ to turn to _him_. She wasn't talking to him because they shared space or because he was pestering her to. No, she was talking to him because she chose to.

His awed silence went on longer than it should have before his brain finally connected to his mouth.

"Oh, good. Okay, yes. Um, bathroom?" He asked lamely as he pointed down the hall to the only truly private room in the bunker.

A moment later he was making sure the chair was in place and closing the bathroom door behind them. No interruptions this time. Not now that _she_ came to _him_.

"What's wrong?" He asked immediately.

She took the letter that was practically balled up in her hand and smacked it into his chest. Frustration clear in her expression. He took the letter from her and then watched her start to pace again.

"My mother meant that letter as a gift, but I actually think it's a curse," Lucy spat angrily. "I-I figured out what Emma did. I know how to get Amy back."

He wasn't understanding why this seemed so upsetting. "Okay, but isn't that a good thing?" He asked.

"She rigged it, Wyatt. Emma goddamn rigged it. She manipulated the Cahills and Wallaces into the same place in time. The same tragedy. I- _we_ can fix it but..."

"But?" He asked as he tried to unfold and smooth out the Carol's letter.

"We can only save one family. Not both. Saving my dad and Amy means-" she stopped talking abruptly and he looked over to find her taking quick shallow breaths and staring him down with wet panicked eyes. "It means I don't exist."

Dread filled him. Cold hard dread. He shook his head at her and pocketed Carol's letter. The task of unwrinkling it was suddenly the last thing on his mind.

"What? Hell no, Lucy, that can't be the only answer." He knew he sounded angry and he should have moderated his tone, but the truth was... _he was angry_.

Not at Lucy, but at Rittenhouse and Emma and the entire fucking universe because that was cruel. Even by Rittenhouse standards that was unusually heartless, and Lucy didn't deserve it.

Her face crumpled and tears spilled out of her wide red eyes. She stopped pacing and turned to face him with a defeated expression and slumped shoulders. "I've looked at every other angle, Wyatt. I have. I explored any other option and tried to untangle all the threads. I've been working on this non-stop. And nothing-nothing else has the domino effect we need. It _is_ the only answer."

Her voice sounded strangled and pained and she looked ready to collapse at any moment. Damn the boundaries he'd set for them, he couldn't stay away when she looked so utterly beaten. He crossed to her in three strides and wrapped his arms tightly around her. It was a good thing he did too because the minute he had her in his embrace her knees gave out. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she clung to him with her face buried in his shoulder as she sobbed.

He backed them up to the wall and leaned against it to slide them both gently to the floor. He pulled her into his lap and held her even tighter. He was at a loss for what to say or what to do other than to keep her close to him for as long as possible.

How could they change this? There had to be some loophole somewhere. There had to be. He wouldn't know what they would do otherwise. Would he be able to do it if she asked him to? Would he be able to go back and save Amy knowing it would cost him Lucy?

God, he hated it but he knew...

If she asked him to he could. If it was really what she wanted-

No. No way. Hell no. He _could_ do it for her but he _wouldn't._ Someone else would have to go. Flynn, maybe? He wouldn't leave her. He refused. Time and the Universe would have to make him forget her before that happened.

And even then...

Some piece of him would always be missing.

He pressed repetitive soft kisses to the top of her head and then pressed his cheek against the same spot he kissed. This was too much. Too horrible. Even for them.

Lucy's tears slowed and he felt her pull her head away from his shoulder.

"Do you know what the worst part is?" She asked him in a heartbroken whisper.

He shook his head. His voice was lost to the tears forming in his eyes after the path his thoughts had taken.

"I'm doubting whether I could go through with it," she confessed through her remaining tears. "How horrible is that? What-what kind of sister am I? I've been fighting all this time to get her back and I could do it. I could save her but I-I'm hesitating. The decision should be easy. Amy would make more of her life than I have and the Cahills are pure blood Rittenhouse. The world would be saved a lot of pain and Amy would be living her life. But, selfishly,... _I don't want to go_. I don't want to disappear. I don't want to leave. I don't have much but what I do have is so damn important to me." She hesitated to continue. She took a breath to keep talking but didn't. Not yet. She looked up at him and pointedly met his eyes. She brought a hand up to tenderly graze his cheek as she spoke. "How can I let that go?"

"Don't," he pleaded. His voice sounded broken and hoarse. "Don't let it go."

' _Don't let me go_ ' was really what he meant.

"But _Amy_ , Wyatt," she as another round of tears ran down her cheeks. "It's _Amy_. She didn't do anything wrong. She wasn't involved in any of this. And, think about it, maybe I haven't gotten her back yet because I'm not supposed to. Maybe she and I were never meant to be in the same universe at the same time. It's her or me and _how_ can I choose _me?_ "

"No, _no._ I refuse to believe that it's her or you. There's a way around it, Lucy. There has to be. We'll find it. We'll find it together. You and me," he promised. He moved a hand from around her waist to wipe away the tears streaking her cheeks. "And wanting to live doesn't make you a horrible sister. It makes you human. It means you have good things and people in your life. You have people to live and fight for. _Of course_ , you don't want to leave that. Besides, what would Amy want? If she were here and she knew this was the choice in front of you, what would she say?"

Lucy stared at him for along moment as if she didn't want to answer. His thumb caught a fresh tear that fell across her cheek as she finally spoke. "She'd call me an idiot," Lucy said with a tearful chuckle. "She'd tell me to stop living my life for other people and, for once, do something for me. She'd tell me to let her go." Her face pinched in pain and she shook her head. "But I can't just let her go. _I can't_. She's supposed to be here. I can't abandon her. _I won't_."

"Then don't. Don't let her go. But _don't_ trade your life for hers. _Please_. Let us help you this time," Wyatt said as he desperately tried to look her in the eyes. She was working hard to avoid it, but he couldn't let her. Finally, her swollen tearful eyes met his. "Let us help you. Me and Rufus and Jiya and Mason and Christopher. All of us. Right there you have three geniuses who invented time travel, okay? If we all put our heads together, we can figure it out. We can save Amy and I can _keep_ you. You deserve to have your sister by your side. After all of this...after everything we've done to preserve history- _you deserve to win_. Don't let Emma or Rittenhouse take that from you, _from me_ , from all of us. It may take a little more time, but damn it, Lucy, isn't it worth a little more time if it means you get to see her again? It's not enough to get her back if you don't get to enjoy it. _It's not enough_."

She closed her eyes and turned her head. He watched for a long tortured moment as tears fell from her closed eyes and she shook her head. "Wyatt..."

Her sentence trailed off and he wasn't sure what she planned to say, but he heard the way she said his name and it terrified him. She sounded resigned, lost. He was afraid she had already made her decision. The selfless choice. The same choice she always made. But he couldn't let her give up. He couldn't lose her. Not now that he knew that his future belonged to her.

"We can help you, Lucy. _Let me help you_." He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes as his own tears escaped from them. "Please don't make me get in the time machine and erase you from existence. I would do it. I would do it for you because I love you but, _goddamnit_ , please don't ask me to. _Don't_."

There was a moment of painful silence that seemed to stretch out for hours, though he knew it couldn't have been more than a minute at most, as he waited with baited breath for her next words.

"I don't want you to," she breathed out in between her tears. "I _should_ want you to but I don't. I should be able to say damn the consequences and go save my sister but... _I can't_. Why can't I do that?"

He could feel her guilt and shame. He could see it in her eyes and on her face and if he wasn't already broken at the thought of losing her, he would have shattered completely. Her tears were flowing again and he didn't know what to say to make any of it easier. It was a horrible choice to make and, selfishly, he was glad she couldn't make the self sacrificing choice but he knew for Lucy, who had _always_ taken care of others needs before her own, that fact had to be crushing her. He kissed both her cheeks where her tears were falling freely and then pressed his lips to her forehead for a long lingering moment.

He'd give anything and everything to fix this for her. To repair her entire life. If he had the power she'd have everything she wanted. Her sister, her mother, her father - a world without Rittenhouse or time travel. Whatever she wanted. But he didn't and he couldn't and so here they were on the floor of the grimey bunker bathroom crying together.

He could feel everything she felt. He was connected to every emotion and all he wanted was to whisk her away to a place where none of this was real, where life could be easy and simple. But neither one of them were the type to run away from a fight. They couldn't walk away from something knowing it would mean innocent people would be hurt. They were in this time travel fiasco until the very end and the only positive thing to come from it would be each other and the team.

He was certain she felt like shit right now. She had a heart wrenching chance to save her sister and she didn't want to do it. She couldn't sacrifice everything she had to make it happen. She may not know why, but he did. He did because if he were in her shoes he wouldn't be able to make that choice either. His reason for sticking around? _Lucy Preston_. He would never be able to leave her behind. Even knowing she wouldn't remember him, even knowing he wouldn't have existed so he wouldn't know it happened. He wanted as much time with her as he could possibly have. He wanted to breathe her in every day. He needed her. If it was a choice between never existing for the good of someone else or her, he would _always_ choose her. Every time.

"Lucy," he said with his cheek pressed against her forehead. "I need you to listen to me very closely. You have nothing- _nothing-_ to be ashamed of. Wanting to live is not unreasonable. I would be worried sick if you _didn't_ want to go on living."

He heard a break in her crying and and one syllable of a sentence, probably intended to contradict him but it wasn't her turn to talk yet.

"No, please, I need you to just listen for a bit, okay?" He said as he interrupted her. "I need you to hear what I'm telling you." He felt her nod against him and he took a steadying breath as he continued.

"I love you. You should know that by now. Or at least I hope you've actually been listening every other time I've said it. But maybe I should tell you why? Maybe I should tell you what I see when I look at you because that woman can definitely turn this impossible situation into something extremely _possible_." He placed a soft kiss to her forehead again. She was letting him be this close, letting him hold her, so he was going demonstrate his affection for her as much as he could until this moment was over. "You are brilliant. You are so brilliant and you know you're brilliant. But you are also brave and resourceful and _strong_. You don't see those things about yourself. No matter how many battles you face or fights you win, you always underestimate your own resilience. You're beautiful, completely stunning, but not just because...well because you are, you're stunning because you care so damn much about everyone and everything. Even people who don't deserve it, even people who break your heart." He paused and swallowed thickly because they both knew he was talking about himself.

"You're stubborn," he said with a chuckle. "Bossy. Determined. Clumsy as hell." He heard a watery laugh from her and felt a piece of his heart slide back into place. "You don't know how to pick a lock but you do know how to wield a lamp like a pro."

This time they both laughed, but his expression grew somber and he held her tighter. "You are the kind of woman who will give up her own happiness for me to have a chance at mine. Even if I didn't know at the time that _you_ were that happiness. You talked Jessica into staying, giving me a second chance, and I can't even imagine if-if that had been me. I don't know that I could have done something that truly selfless. You are the kind of woman who loves her mother through all the betrayal because you understand that people are messy and complicated. The kind of woman who once _asked me_ to take a risky shot with you in danger because it would finish off Rittenhouse for good. The kind of woman who befriended a _total psycho_ even after he kidnapped you and tried to kill you several times. You frustrate me and baffle me at the amount of compassion you manage to carry around every day. So much compassion that it can make my job that much more difficult."

He paused because he wanted to make sure this next part wasn't over looked. This was important. "If you have that much compassion and forgiveness in your heart for others, shouldn't you be able to have some of that for _yourself_? The woman I love," Wyatt said as he moved his lips from her forehead to the shell of her ear and spoke softly, "That woman, she would understand. She wouldn't judge. She knows that the world is full of gray and what matters is that you navigate the gray places by listening to your own heart. _Your heart_ is telling you you're still needed and that this world, _my world_ , can't do without you. Listen to it. Don't fight it." He took a deep breath and when he released the breath, it was shaky and uneven. He loved her and she was hurting, therefore _he_ was hurting. "Take it from me, fighting your heart's advice never does anyone any good. I've been there. I tried that. I nearly lost you because of it. You're beautiful, wonderful, maddening, and _human_. You don't have to do what's best for _everyone else_ all the time. Fight, Lucy. Fight for your own happiness. Fight for what _you_ want. Fight for a world that has both you _and_ Amy in it."

When he was finished, she curled further into him and pressed her face into the crook of his neck. He could feel the wetness of her tears against his skin as she cried. He rubbed her back soothingly and waited. Waited for her to process his words. Finally, she pulled herself away from his neck so he could see her tear stained face.

She inhaled slowly and as she did he actually saw her pull herself together. Her fear and her sadness were focused into determination and resolve. She met his eyes and nodded before quietly saying, "Okay."

"Okay?" He asked. He needed to be sure he knew what she was agreeing to.

"Okay, Wyatt, I wanna fight for her. _For me_. And I-" she swallowed thickly as a brief moment of doubt and vulnerability flashed through her brown eyes. "I need your help."

For the first time since he noticed her pacing in the doorway he felt himself relax. _Thank God._ Or the Force or the Universe or whatever power that be that allowed his words to get through to her.

"Anything for you, ma'am," he answered in a raw and raspy voice. "First things first," he said before clearing his throat of his tears. "We pick ourselves up off the damn mat." He paused, looked around, and then smirked at her. "Or tile floor, I guess."

She gave him a small amused smile and rolled her eyes. She shifted herself off of his lap and he steadied her by the waist as she stood. He stiffly pulled himself up and then nodded to the door.

"And _now_ we call in the cavalry," Wyatt said as he smiled encouragingly at her. "We're gonna need the whole team on this one."

She took in a nervous breath and he nudged her shoulder playfully.

"We'll get her back, Lucy," he assured her earnestly. "Rufus and Jiya are the smartest people we know. Asking them for help can only be a _good_ thing. Besides, that's what we're here for. To lean on each other. To work together. That's what we do. We know how important Amy is. We won't let you forget her. _I_ won't let you forget her. I promise."

Her eyes filled with tears again and she scrubbed both hands over her face. He immediately worried she was spiraling back down and reached for her. He pulled back at the last second, remembering the boundaries he'd temporarily dropped.

"What? What is it? What's wrong?" He asked in concern.

When she pulled her hands away from her face she was smiling brightly at him while quiet tears slipped out of the corners of her eyes.

"Oh, plenty over all," she said with a soft chuckle. Her eyes met his and he felt the full force of her emotions. Shock, awe, wonder, _hope_. "But nothing in this particular moment. Not...with you. These tears," she said as she swiped at her cheeks. "Are the grateful kind, the _disbelieving_ kind. I-I don't know why I tried to figure this out without you. I should have included you a long time ago, Wyatt. I see that now. We work best together, don't we?"

He nodded and smiled warmly at her. "Well, we've been at this a while now, you and me, and no matter what else happens, we're always going to be a team, Professor."

Despite her wet cheeks and red eyes he caught the mischievous smirk she gave him as she passed him and headed for the door. His eyes followed her but his feet didn't.

She moved the chair and opened the door before looking back at him over her shoulder. "A team, huh? Like the infamous Lucy and Wyatt?" The mischief in her eyes darkened very slightly and flashed something else - something sultry- as she continued. "Or...maybe it's more like Logan and Preston?"

He managed to give her a crooked smirk as his mouth suddenly went dry. How he maintained any semblance of self control, he wasn't sure. All he wanted to do in that moment was kiss her senseless. The smirk, the dark eyes, the tempting way she worried her bottom lip. She was doing this on purpose. _She was flirting with him._

"If you're making me choose," he replied after clearing his throat and finding his voice. "I've always been a little partial to Logan and Preston, myself."

She flashed him a smile that bared all of her teeth before she replied, "Me too."

And then she was gone. Down the hallway headed toward the main silo, probably. Off to find Rufus while he was still glued to the spot, too stunned to process what just happened.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, I won't lie to you guys, I struggled with this chapter. Omg. If it weren't for Iambeck (Yessssssica) and Jenna I would not have made it through. Hopefully you guys enjoy!  
> Happy reading!  
> angellwings

The mission got away from them.

It went off the rails.

 _Literally_.

July 9th, 1918. The Great Train Wreck of 1918.

Two months before they would find Lucy in St. Mihiel and bring her home. Two months before she almost sacrificed herself to stop Rittenhouse. Two months before Rufus tried to tell him the truth. Two months before he refused to really listen. Maybe if he'd listened he would have saved himself and Lucy a lot of pain. But then again, maybe not. Regrets were constant but always uncertain.

What was he going on about? What was his original point?

Oh, right, The Great Train Wreck of 1918. Nashville, Tennessee. 101 deaths. 171 injuries.

Well, maybe now it was 172 injuries. He was sort of pinned down under one of the wooden passenger car walls at the moment. It was possible he had a couple of broken ribs.

Emma sent him on a wild goose chase. She led him to this train on purpose. A trap. And maybe if he had stayed with Lucy and Rufus, someone could have warned him of that but he had to take off like the damn hot headed idiot he was. All because Emma let off a shot that was an _inch_ away from striking Lucy in the head.

 _An inch_.

"Wyatt!"

He groaned at the sound of his name and tried to move the large piece of wood off of him. But it was heavy and he was barely conscious.

" _Wyatt!"_

Lucy.

"Wyatt!"

Rufus.

Get up. Answer them. Do something, idiot.

" _Wyatt!"_

His throat felt like sandpaper but he cleared it anyway in order to finally respond. "Lucy!"

There was a pause and then another, " _Wyatt!"_ That one sounded closer than the last.

"Over here!" he called out again. "Lucy!"

Five minutes of silence and then...

"Oh my god, Wyatt."

_There she was._

He craned his neck around as much as he could to find his two best friends standing just behind him. Both looked out of breath and panicked.

"Help me get this off me," he said as he tried to push the broken wall again. Both nodded and took either side. Between the three of them they lifted it enough for him to slide out.

The wood dropped with a thud and Wyatt finally felt like he could breathe. He pushed himself up with a pained groan and held a hand to his side. If his ribs weren't broken then there were at least bruised.

"Are you okay, man?" Rufus asked as he gave him a wary once over. "You look like hell."

He smirked a little at that and looked between the two of them. "No, I look like a _train wreck_." he paused and let out a hoarse chuckle. "Get it?"

"Not your best, dude," Rufus said with a grin and a shake of his head.

He shrugged one shoulder, the one not on the side of his bruised and-or broken ribs, and replied, "Eh, I gave it a shot."

"Wyatt," Lucy said harshly as she led the two of them over to the side of the train tracks, where a crowd was starting to gather. "What the hell were you thinking? You just took off! You could have been killed in this accident. Did you hear me at all when I told you _not_ to get on the train?"

"I was following Emma. That's the job," Wyatt told her with a wince as walking jostled his injuries.

"Right and she probably bailed off the back of the train the minute it left the station," Lucy told him in a scolding tone.

"She nearly killed you, Lucy," Wyatt said with thick swallow.

"And?" Rufus asked with a wry grin. "What else is new?"

"She's never come _that_ close," Wyatt said as he gritted his teeth. "That was nearly a _head shot_. Not a graze. I couldn't just let her-"

"What?" Lucy asked him with an impatient huff. "Get away? Cause I'm pretty sure she did that anyway."

The crowd around the tracks and the chaos of mangled train cars was growing thicker. Wyatt ignored her earlier comment to ask a question. "Where are all these people coming from?"

"The sound of the crash could be heard for two miles," Lucy told him. "They're coming to help. According to reports as many as 50,000 people showed up to help rescue survivors."

He winced with each step now. Damn, his chest hurt.

"50,000 people?" Rufus asked with wide disbelieving eyes. "You're kidding, right?"

"Not in the slightest. 50,000 people really did show up," Lucy assured him as Wyatt hissed in pain.

She rolled her eyes and ducked under his arm.

"Stop being stubborn and lean on me," Lucy told him.

"I'm not going to lean on you. I'm fine."

Rufus moved to Wyatt's other side. "I don't know. It's five miles to the Lifeboat. You might want to reconsider. We're not Delta Force but we've got pretty solid shoulders, man. They're great for things like carrying backpacks, a good chicken fight in the pool...or, I don't know, supporting an injured friend who miraculously survived the worst train wreck in U.S. history. Things like that."

Wyatt chuckled at Rufus before finally nodding and putting an arm around Rufus to match the one Lucy had already put around herself. He may be a stubborn bastard but Lucy and Rufus always held their own against him. It was no use fighting their help.

"Hey," Lucy said after a few minutes of silence had passed.

He met her eyes and realized her face was a lot closer to his than he originally thought. It wouldn't take much leaning to kiss her. Too bad he was waiting for her to make that first move. It was a wasted opportunity. Though if the way her eyes went to his lips was indication she was thinking about it too.

"Yes?" He asked when she seemed to have forgotten her words.

She shook herself slightly, as if jarring her thoughts back into place, and then said, "Next time, no unnecessary heroics, okay? Please? You could have died and it would have been for nothing."

"Not for nothing," he told her. "As long as Emma is out there you're in danger. If I can get a shot at her, I'm taking it."

"But you didn't, did you? And then if, god forbid, you actually had died in that accident that would have left me and Rufus to face Emma alone. Do _you_ like the sound of that?" She asked. "Cause I sure as hell don't."

She was right. She was always right.

"Fair point," he admitted with a sigh. "That shot was just so close. _Too close_. If we had moved a split second slower then I could have...I could have lost you."

She stared at him for a long moment as if she had something she wanted to say, but then her eyes drifted to Rufus and she bit her bottom lip anxiously. "But you didn't lose me, Wyatt. And you knew that before you took off after Emma."

"Well, I'm a reckless hothead. What else did you expect?" Wyatt asked her with a smirk.

Rufus chuckled at them and gave Lucy an amused grin. "I think he's got you there."

Lucy shook her head. She didn't bother with a verbal response. There wasn't much she could say to dispute his point. And she knew it.

By the time the Lifeboat came into view, even leaning on Rufus and Lucy wasn't enough to prevent the searing pain in his side. He actually couldn't wait to get back to the damn bunker. That's how much pain he was in.

Just as they reached the Lifeboat a shot rang out and Wyatt was immediately alert, pain in his side willed away. He had his gun raised and ready with Rufus and Lucy pushed behind him in a matter of seconds.

"Go," he told them. "Get in the Lifeboat."

Emma appeared from several feet away and Wyatt groaned.

"Seriously? You followed us?" He asked her with a glare as he heard Rufus clamoring to open the Lifeboat's front hatch.

"Your mission might be to eliminate me, but I have one too," Emma replied with a smirk. "Eliminate the three of you and destroy the Lifeboat. And today I plan to make good."

He snorted. "I doubt that."

Emma came closer with her gun trained on him. She took a shot, he ducked behind the nearest tree for cover, and took one of his own. He heard Emma grunt and he peeked around the tree to see her tuck one arm against her side while blood stained the upper arm of her blouse. Her gun was still pointed in his direction. He couldn't have done anything more than graze her arm.

He had to get out from behind this tree. The hatch to the Lifeboat was still open and he was no longer standing between it and Emma. He wasn't expecting an injured Emma to move so quickly though. A near fatal mistake. The minute he came around the tree, he found himself directly in front of Emma. Guns trained on each other's heads.

"Well, if I couldn't take out the princess at least I can take out her boy toy. That's consolation enough."

"You shoot, I shoot, Whitmore," Wyatt answered with a lopsided smirk. No way he was going to let her see how apprehensive he was. Either he would walk away or she would. He hoped it was him.

His finger hovered over the trigger and Emma's hand twitched over hers but before either of them could fire off a shot Emma's gun flew out of her hands and she collapsed to the ground. He stared in shock as she started convulsing and then finally spotted the thin wires coming from Emma's back. He followed the wires to a figure standing less than a foot away with a taser gun in her delicate hands.

_Lucy._

"Let's _go,"_ Lucy said with a glare and a tense jaw as she threw the taser gun on top of Emma's writhing body and gently pushed him toward the hatch. "I've almost lost you _twice_ today, Wyatt. I'm done. Let's get _out_ of here."

"Where the hell did you get a taser?" He asked her as he helped her climb into the Lifeboat.

"Rufus keeps at least one on board, now that we sometimes take Flynn with us," Lucy answered as she stepped through the hatch.

Wyatt chuckled and nodded. "Good thinking."

He grimaced as he made his way up and into the Lifeboat, his ribs somehow hurt _worse_ than they had before. He didn't think that was possible. The pain was already excruciating.

Lucy reached forward to help him but he waved her off. She huffed and sat down in her seat and then closed the hatch once he was all the way in. He watched her buckle her seat belt as he sat down and worked on his own. He missed the days when he could use her seatbelt as an excuse to be near her. She didn't need his help now.

"Are we good?" Rufus asked.

"Aside from a couple of broken ribs?" Wyatt asked with a dry grin. "Sure."

Lucy didn't look amused. She gulped back an emotion he couldn't read and averted her gaze. She nodded at Rufus and then said, "Let's just get the hell out of here."

"Happy to," Rufus replied as the Lifeboat roared to life.

One excruciatingly nauseas jolt later and they were landing in the silo. Almost as soon as they landed Lucy was unbuckled and opening the hatch. He'd rarely seen her move that fast after a landing.

"Wyatt's hurt," she said as he saw someone slide the stairs into place.

Lucy waited until he was up and on his way down the stairs before she stepped out of the Lifeboat herself. Denise had gone to retrieve one of the field medics they kept on call.

"What happened?" Jiya asked.

"Oh, you know, just The Great Train Wreck of 1918," Rufus answered from behind Lucy, sounding overly casual. "A normal Tuesday at the secret underground bunker."

Wyatt didn't answer. He assumed Rufus could handle that. He was focused on Lucy. Something was wrong. She refused to look at him, but she wasn't leaving. She moved off to the side of the group, at the edge of the room, like she was waiting for her cue to run. He was running over the days events and trying to fit any of that with how Lucy was acting now. She was acting...caged. Something was anchoring her here when she really wanted to be very far away. He couldn't make sense of it.

Rufus was still filling Jiya in on the mission when Agent Christopher and the field medic swept into the room. Once the medic was in front of Wyatt, trying to assess his injuries, Lucy turned on her heel and took off toward the bunks. Wyatt looked from the direction she ran to Rufus. His friend didn't look surprised to see Lucy suddenly retreat to her room, and made his way over to Wyatt.

Wyatt automatically answered the medics questions. He barely listened to them. They were always the same and he'd been treated by enough field medics to know how this would go.

"What happened?" Wyatt asked Rufus with a grimace as the medic gently prodded his injured side.

"With Lucy?" Rufus asked.

Wyatt nodded. "Clearly, I missed something. What was it?"

"Does that hurt?" the medic asked as he prodded Wyatt again. Wyatt rolled his eyes and grunted.

"Yeah, like hell," Wyatt replied before looking back over at Rufus. "What happened?"

"You got on a doomed train that was destined to become the worst trainwreck in U.S. history, man. It took us a half hour to catch up with the train and the accident was set to happen about thirteen minutes after it left the station. We didn't know what we were going to find when we got to you," Rufus admitted with an emotional gulp. "What do you think happened? She was a _wreck_. I wasn't much better myself but, Lucy... **.** Well, let's just say the last time I saw her like that I was pulling her out of a furnace in H.H. Holmes' Murder Hotel."

His brow furrowed and he shook his head. "I-I didn't know. She seemed...she seemed okay when you guys found me."

"Yeah, well, at that point we found you and you were okay," Rufus explained. "But you should have seen her face when you called her name in the middle of all the wreckage. She looked... _elated_. And I have never seen her run so fast. Not even during the many times we've run for our lives. Oh, and _then_ you had to go and get yourself in a literal head to head shoot out with Emma. She screamed at me to find that taser. _Screamed_. She was frantic. She may have seemed cool and collected to you, my friend, but the Lucy I saw looked like her world was crumbling _twice_ today."

"I should talk to her," Wyatt said with concern.

"Yeah, you should. You should also think about not going so hard after Emma from now on. You're going to get yourself killed if you keep up like you did today and Emma isn't worth that," Rufus said as he gave Wyatt a stern glance.

"He's not going anywhere till I finish this examination," The medic said with a tired sigh. "Do you mind?"

"Can you just give me the painkillers and be done?" Wyatt asked with a smirk. "It's my ribs so that's what you're going to end up doing anyway, right? You're going to help me 'manage my pain'. I've been here a few times before, doc."

The medic glared at Wyatt for a moment before turning to face Agent Christopher. "You must be a very patient woman."

Christopher scoffed and chuckled. "You have no idea."

"Listen," Rufus said as they both watched the medic scribble out a painkiller prescription. "I'm going to need the two of you to get back together soon, okay? I mean I know the first time you barely had a day but that was the most tolerable you two _ever_ were. Also, Flynn and I are being suffocated by the tension. If you don't finally get together on your own, we have a contingency plan."

Wyatt felt both amused and annoyed as he looked over at Rufus. "You and Flynn talk about us?"

"It's either band together or let the Lyatt drama kill us slowly," Rufus answered. "Are you happy? Your tension has forced me to actually find common ground with _Flynn_."

Wyatt chuckled and shrugged, breathing sharply at the pain in his ribs. "No, I'm not, but Lucy would be."

"God, she would, wouldn't she? She would love that this somehow helped Flynn and I get along. That's...that's... _infuriating_."

Despite knowing it would hurt, Wyatt laughed anyway. "Infuriating is kind of her specialty and I gotta admit... _I love it_."

"Okay," the medic said as he handed Agent Christopher the prescription. "He'll need those to manage his pain but, until you can pick them up, tylenol or advil should do. You got lucky, Master Sergeant, as far as I can tell your ribs are just severely bruised. Not broken."

"What did I tell you?" Wyatt asked with a smug smile. "Manage my pain. Classic."

Agent Christopher rolled her eyes and thanked the medic as he left. Jiya brought him some advil and he quickly swallowed them dry.

He needed a shower, a talk with Lucy, and rest. He was tempted to go talk to Lucy now but the grime from the accident covered him and it might be a good idea to give the advil time to kick in so it would stop hurting so much when he breathed. He took a shower and changed into a t-shirt and sweats. Now that he was clean and the pain had dulled, he was headed straight form his room to Lucy's. Or so he thought.

Until he opened his door to step out into the hall and found Lucy pacing on the other side of it. She had changed into her own sweats and her floral robe. Her hair looked damp so she'd obviously taken a shower too. Her face looked anxious and he could see the wear and tear of the day in her expression.

"Hey," he said softly with a stunned look.

"Hey," she said with a nervous gulp as she stopped pacing and turned to face him.

Their eyes connected and her brown eyes searched his face. They roamed over his every feature and looked dark and intense. He couldn't read much in her expression and it worried him. He was about to ask her what was wrong when she suddenly darted across the doorway. Her hands held his face as her lips crashed down on his. His lips parted for a surprised sharp intake of air and Lucy took full advantage.

What the hell was going on? What happened to cause this? One of her hands slipped into his hair and he couldn't stop the groan in his throat. Her warm hand caressed back and forth over the shorter hairs above his ear and it caused tension to coil in his stomach. Not angry tension like he felt in the midst of a fight but the push and pull of his wants and needs conflicting with the rules he created for himself. She had kissed him, yes, but was it because she thought she almost lost him today? Or had she actually thought this through?

His hands were clenched into fists at his sides as he struggled with how to respond. He had been thinking about this moment for months and he didn't want to waste it. But he didn't want her to regret it either.

"Wyatt," Lucy whispered as she pulled back from the kiss to nuzzle her nose against his. " _Kiss me_. It's okay."

All the times he imagined this scenario he never pictured it like this. He pictured hesitance and quiet confessions but not _this_. She wanted action. She wanted to jump now, think later. But the way she wanted it didn't matter as much to him as the fact the _she_ came _to him_. This was her decision and she seemed determined. Who was he to question that? He had to trust her to know herself.

His trust in Lucy Preston had never faltered before and he wasn't going to let it falter _now_.

He smirked and ghosted his lips over hers lightly as one hand landed on the small of her back and pulled her flush against him. Her eyes fluttered closed and she whimpered at the almost touch of his lips to hers. His other hand found its way to the back of her neck, and the familiarity of the gesture caused an ache of longing in him. And that's when it hit him, hard and fast, this was an ache he could actually soothe. She'd given him permission.

There was no longer a reason to hold back.

When his lips found hers again there was a hunger between them that surprised even _him_. His arms tightened around her and he lifted her feet off the floor to pull her into the room with him. He let go of the back of her neck long enough to blindly reach out and close the door. He could feel the dull pain of his bruised ribs as he crushed Lucy against him, but he didn't give a damn. She was finally ready for this, his ribs could burn under his skin all they wanted. The pain didn't matter when Lucy's hands were wandering up and down his arms, across his cheeks, and through his hair. He had dreamed of her touch, yearned for the soft caress of her hands, and now it was his reality.

He set her feet back on the ground once the door was closed. The kissing never stopped. Which was fine with him. They could keep going forever if she wanted. For all he cared, The world outside the bedroom door could implode. This small corner of it was all that mattered to him at the moment. Lucy placed her hands on his shoulders and walked him backward until his back hit the closed door. She wrapped her arms his neck and leaned as far into him as she possibly could. She was kissing him with everything she had in her. He could feel it. Everything she was afraid to say out loud was being communicated to him right now.

Teeth nipped, tongues explored, hands wandered. Wyatt flipped their positions and pressed Lucy into the door. Her soft curves were a perfect fit against his lean muscles. Melded to the point of not knowing where he began and she ended. His hands untied the knot in her robe and slipped underneath it. He quickly found the inch of exposed skin between the waistband of her sweatpants and the bottom hem of her sweatshirt, eager to feel her smooth skin against his calloused hands.

Almost as soon as his hands touched her skin, Lucy gasped and pulled back from the kisses breathlessly.

His eyes found hers and he grinned. Her eyes were dilated and a sultry midnight shade of brown. Her lips were swollen and pink and her pale skin was flushed all over. She was that freshly kissed kind of alluring that made him want to immediately dive back in.

But Lucy's hand caressing his cheek prevented him from doing that. Though, the break in kissing was worth it for her next words.

"I don't want to fight this anymore, Wyatt. I want _you_. I want _us_."

He pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes to let her words sink in. "Do you mean that?" He asked.

"More than anything," Lucy replied. "I hate this distance between us more and more every day. I've missed you."

"I've missed you too, Luce."

 _Luce_. He hadn't uttered that nickname since 1941. He never used it before or after that night. It felt too sacred to be said again once he decided to make things work with Jessica. It was a nickname that had lived and died in Hedy's guest house, a nickname he had whispered against her skin in a frenzy of passion, a nickname he doubted he would ever get to use again. But here it was leaving his lips as naturally as breathing. That fact alone meant he had no choice but to flash her a beaming smile as he said it.

He opened his eyes and found uncertain brown ones staring back at him. His brow furrowed because that wasn't the look he expected to see on her face.

"What? What's wrong?" He asked.

"I-I want to be with you, Wyatt, but I still can't...I can't say the words yet," Lucy admitted as she pulled her forehead away from his and avoided looking him in the eyes. "I want to, but every time I try they just...they get stuck. I feel like I'm hurting you more and more the longer it takes me to be ready to say them and you've been so patient and done so much for me. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I want this. I want _you_. But I'm afraid that being with me and not hearing the words may not be what you need right now and I don't want to make things worse."

His hand traveled to the curve of her neck and he let his thumb softly trace the line of her jaw. That's what she was worried about? He dipped his head down to hers and kissed her again. Softly, gently. Nipping at her lips with small consecutive kisses. They were open but not intrusive and with every kiss he was hoping to assure her that she was worrying over nothing. She needed to know that he was willing to stay by her side through anything. The last of the kisses was placed on her forehead, between her brows, where the he had noticed a pained wrinkle while she talked. He pulled back again and focused his gaze on hers. He was not going to let her look away this time.

"Being with you could never make things worse," he told her earnestly. "Being with you is all I want - all I will ever want - and I don't care if you can't say the words now. I don't care if you can't say the words ten years from now. If you want this then I'm in. From the first time I told you I loved you I knew this would be on your terms. There's no rush, no pressure. You don't have to force or fake anything you don't feel. You can care for me in whatever way you want as long as you keep letting me try to win you back."

"That's not fair to you, though," Lucy said as her concerned eyes roamed his face. Her hand caressed his cheek with the backs of her fingers and then her thumb as her palm cupped his stubbly cheek. "You almost died twice today and the thought of you dying before I was able to return this crazy ridiculously unconditional love you have for me just felt so... **.** It felt so _wrong_."

"The only thing I care about is that _you_ know how I feel," Wyatt replied as he leaned into her touch. He turned his head and placed a kiss to her palm as he continued. "If anything happens to me then that's enough. I was an idiot who left you to question that for much longer than I should have."

"Your sense of calm is super annoying," Lucy told him with an affectionate smile. It was a warm reminder of who they used to be, of how this all started. She was slowly accepting his words and realizing he was well aware that journey wasn't over just because she kissed him.

He knew that. He knew she was still wary of letting herself fall, of giving up control. He knew _her_ so, of course, he knew that. She needed to be able to trust that he wasn't going anywhere this time, no matter how long it took.

"I told you I would prove to you that I'm all in," Wyatt assured her. "Well, this is me... _all in_."


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** Well hello! Sorry I've been away from this story for so long! I am trying to finish up this story, Habit of You, and write a follow up to Sun, Sun, Sun. Plus the AB is working on our fanfic S3 so I can't promise consistency but this story is definitely not done! I have so much more story in mind for these two!
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
>  
> 
> angellwings
> 
>  
> 
> PS - sorry this is kinda short.

This is the way things should have been all along.

Little touches and secretive smiles and blushes that spread from the top of her hair line to the curve of her neck.

Those things meant all was right in his world and he should have just _known_ that from the very beginning. From the minute he opened his eyes in that waiting room at Mason Industries and saw her sitting there with that irritated expression. How had he let them waste all this time apart?

God, he was an idiot. A _huge_ idiot.

But he learned his lesson. He knew now.

And, thank all of his lucky stars, she was letting him earn back the ground he lost. But he never would have guessed it would happen like this.

He had never imagined her showing up at his door looking worried and frazzled and he certainly wouldn't have imagined the way she had pounced on him. But then when had anything with Lucy been predictable? Even when their connection was easy and effortless it wasn't predictable. It never had been and it likely never would be.

Especially not now. She couldn't say the words but she wanted to be with him. That also wasn't how he imagined it, but he wasn't leaving. He wasn't giving up. He would take whatever she was willing to give and he would be beyond content with it. He wanted _her_ more than he wanted to hear those three words. He was happy to be whatever she needed him to be and do whatever she needed him to do.

Right now, for example, he was perfectly happy sharing his tiny cot with her. Especially, while they rested on their sides, facing each other, and were lazily kissing. Every now and then Lucy would hum contentedly or smile against his lips, but he could feel her slowing down little by little. She was exhausted. It had been a long day with a stressful mission. The train wreck had led to his life being in danger twice and before that he had watched a bullet come within a inch of striking Lucy's head. He was tired too.

But it had to be worse for Lucy. She hadn't gotten a good and solid nights sleep in months. He knew how late she stayed up and he knew she rarely slept through the night. She never really talked about it but he knew part of it had to do with those six weeks Rittenhouse had her. She rarely felt secure enough to sleep. The fear of finding herself back there was too great. The other part of it was simply a result of her brilliant mind. She had a difficult time shutting it off, especially in light of her mother's letter.

If he was exhausted then she had to be dead on her feet.

Her lips froze over his for a moment and he heard her breathing deepen. He grinned against her lips and opened his eyes to find her dozing lightly. A split second later she sucked in a sudden breath and she was kissing him again.

He chuckled and leaned back from the kiss. "You know, I don't know if I should be offended or flattered that you're falling asleep in the middle of a kiss."

She blushed and buried her face in his shoulder. He heard a muffled apology against his shirt before he placed a kiss to her temple.

She lifted her face from his shoulder and then met his eyes. Her eyes looked bleary but warm. A definite welcome change from the cold distance he'd grown accustomed to seeing.

"I don't know why I'm so tired," Lucy said before she covered a yawn with her hand.

Wyatt smiled affectionately at her before replying. "I do. You haven't gotten a good night's sleep since we got you back from 1918. Not to mention today was pretty emotional for both of us. Honestly, I'm surprised you've stayed awake this long."

She watched him carefully for a moment before giving him a shy smile. "I think I would still be wide awake if you weren't here and we hadn't _talked_."

His brow furrowed and he tilted his head just slightly. "What do you mean?"

"I always feel like if I let my guard down to sleep then something will happen. Or I'll wake up and..."

"And?" Wyatt asked curiously.

"And all of this will have been a lie or a dream," she admitted with a soft conflicted sigh. "I know that sounds illogical or irrational but it's so hard to trust anything any more. If time travel is real then anything can happen. I could wake up back at Rittenhouse headquarters and you and Rufus could still be-you both could still be dead." Her voice sounded so heartbroken and it made him hurt for her. He could only do so much to ease that fear for her. He couldn't take it away from her. No matter how much he wished he could. As she continued the ache in his chest grew. "Whether it's a real threat or the threat of _actually_ waking up...sleeping never feels safe. It especially felt like a vulnerability when you and I were so distant."

He pulled her closer and kissed her forehead. "I'm alive, Luce. You're awake. If this were a dream I would hope I would have been less of a jackass. If you were going to dream up a better reality then I would hope you would imagine me at my best and not...whatever the hell I have been the last few months."

"I think we both need to let that go, Wyatt. You-you did the best you could. It was an impossible situation and it was designed to be that way. I see that now," she told him as she tightened her arms around his neck and trailed a few small kisses along his jaw. "I have issues saying the words that you deserve to hear but I wouldn't be here with you right now if I hadn't forgiven you for that. I can't say the words because of my own issues. It's not because of you. Not really. I also wouldn't be falling asleep in your arms if I didn't feel safe with you. I think...I think that's why I'm so tired now. For the first time in months I feel like I can let a little bit of my guard down because...because you're here."

He swallowed thickly to hold back tears. Lucy was no stranger to his emotions but right now they were both tired and she was opening up to him. She didn't need to help him rein in his emotions in addition to her own. But her words meant more to him than she probably knew. She forgave him? She felt safe with him? Both of those things meant they were well on their way to regaining the trust she lost in him. Regaining that trust was just as important to him as those three sacred words.

"Well, by all means, ma'am, I am happy to be your pillow," he told her as ran a hand through her soft dark hair.

His hands lingered in the ends of it so he could feel it between his fingers. Her hair was always in the tiniest bit of disarray. Mostly perfect but for a few wild fly always. He always preferred her naturally misbehaving hair to the expertly pinned and braided styles she wore when they traveled. He preferred to see _her_ and her frizzy flyaway strands on an otherwise flawless head seemed to be an accurate depiction of Lucy Preston.

She leaned into him and he shifted them both so that he was lying on his back with her head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and tucked her securely against him. If she needed someone to watch her six while she slept then he was happy to oblige.

"Thank you, Wyatt."

He grinned up at the bunker ceiling and then kissed the top of her head. "Anything for you, ma'am."

"Next time, I won't fall asleep mid kiss," she assured him with a chuckle.

He laughed with a shake of his head before he spoke. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Professor. You've pulled one too many all nighters for me to believe it won't ever happen again."

A soft laugh and a sleepy kiss to his neck was all the reply she could manage before her eyes drifted closed and her breathing deepened. God, he hoped she made a habit out of this. His cot might be tiny but he would eagerly share it with her if it meant more memories like this one.

They deserved happy, peaceful memories to contradict the shit Rittenhouse regularly put them all through. _She_ deserved it most of all. He wasn't typically a hopeful person but for Lucy's sake he hoped this was truly a fresh start for them both. He knew he would do his part to make sure that, from here on out, the good would outweigh the bad. For her. For him. _For both of them_.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: okay I know this is short and the last update was short BUT I needed to give these two some happy before I dive back into the drama. So this is my happy buffer lol. Hope you guys like it!
> 
> Happy Reading!
> 
> angellwings

Two mornings ago, he’d woken up with Lucy Preston in his arms. That alone was worth all of his waiting. She wasn’t ready to say those famous three little words yet and she wasn’t ready to go any further than a few exhilarating kisses, but he was fine with all of that. He told her she set the pace and he meant it. He only had one problem.

Now that he’d kissed her again, how the hell was he ever going to stop?

He smirked at her from across the common area, glanced from side to side to make sure the coast was clear, and then crossed the room to her. She was in the kitchen, waiting on the kettle to whistle. In a few quick strides, he had her trapped with his hands resting on the counter on either side of her waist and his chest pressed to her back. He buried his face in her dark brown hair and breathed her in before dropping his head and kissing her neck.

“Good morning,” he greeted her as she finally turned in his arms to face him.

“Good morning,” she replied with a wide grin. “It seems everyone else is sleeping in today.”

“Lucky for us,” Wyatt said with a smirk while she slowly snaked her arms around his neck.

“Lucky, huh?” She asked with a teasing smile. “What exactly do you think is going to happen in the middle of the kitchen, Master Sergeant?”

“A little bit of making out,” he said with a grin and a wink. “And a lot of respecting your limits that we talked about _in detail_ the other night.”

“Ah, so you did listen,” Lucy said with a chuckle. “I wasn’t sure.”

“Been telling you all along, Luce,” he said as he leaned his face closer and brushed his nose against hers. “You set the terms and I’ll be more than ready stick to them. I get it. Besides, I always listen when you talk. _Always_.”

She bit her bottom lip as her eyes trained on his lips and he knew what was coming. They were gravitating closer to each other as they always did and just as his lips barely grazed hers they heard a resigned sigh.

“Okay, I wanted you two back together but I didn’t want to _see it_. I think I saw more than enough in 1941, don’t you?” Rufus asked as he blearily stumbled into the kitchen. “Where’s the coffee?”

“And we’re back to being interrupted.” Wyatt said with a roll of his eyes and a huff. “Great.”

Lucy laughed lightly and placed a lingering kiss on his cheek. “At least some things never change, no matter the timeline, we always have Rufus walking in on us.”

Rufus turned and glared at them as he scooped coffee grounds into a filter. “Please dear god no. I do not want to be doomed to a life of cock blocking. No thanks.”

“You sure?” Wyatt asked as he accused him in a teasing tone. “You’re pretty good at it. Kinda started to think it was intentional.”

“Not intentional. I mean, not every time intentional. Intentional maybe one time. Okay, _sometimes_ intentional--”

Lucy shook her head and patted Rufus’ shoulder with a chuckle. “Stop now. Maybe you shouldn’t speak until you’ve had coffee.”

“Yep,” Rufus said with a nod. “That sounds accurate.” It didn’t seem to stop him from talking though. He just changed topics. “So, this is happening? For real happening?”

Wyatt glanced over at Lucy, silently fielding the question to her.

She smiled shyly at him and then nodded to Rufus. “For real happening.” 

“Oh, thank God,” Rufus said with relieved sigh. “Moondoggie over here was killing me with all of his moping.”

Wyatt glared at him. “I didn’t mope.”

Lucy bit her bottom lip and hesitantly nodded her agreement. “You kind of did.”

“Et tu, Preston?” He asked her as he feigned a wounded look.

“I’m sorry but sometimes the way you looked at me made me feel like I kicked a puppy,” she told him with wan smile.

His brow furrowed at the idea of causing her any additional pain or guilt. He stepped further into her space and caught her chocolate eyes with his. “That wasn’t intentional.” 

She skimmed a hand over his cheek as she replied. “I know.”

“Well, I’m happy for you both,” Rufus told them with a genuine smile. “Just try not to let me see too much of it. Or tell me when to cover my eyes. _Something_.”

“Hey Rufus,” Wyatt said with a smirk.

“Yeah?” He asked warily.

“Cover your eyes.”

Rufus hurried to place a hand over his eyes as Wyatt dipped Lucy with a flourish and a wink. Lucy laughed and shook her head at him just before his lips covered hers. In the midst of the kissing, he faintly heard the whistle of the tea kettle.

“Hey. Hey, guys, is someone gonna turn off the stove or—oh nope, you’re not done. Okay, I’ll just wait here then with my hand still firmly over my eyes. Fun times.”  



	14. Chapter 14

Nothing peaceful was meant to last when you lived in a rusted tin can and traveled through time for a living. Things were good for too long. Wyatt made progress with Lucy. The war against Emma was seeing far more victories than losses, though they were still fighting defensively. They were always a step behind even when they won. Wyatt settled for the satisfaction of not having any curve balls lobbed their way. They always had at least one or two. For once there had been none.

When he voiced this to Lucy over their mutual workspace, he should have knocked on wood. He knew better. The minute either one of them stated something with confidence the Universe decided to test it.

Lucy was highlighting and circling on printed copies of her mother’s letter while Wyatt was catching up on mission reports. They had papers spread across one of the tables in the Bunker Mess with a mutual pot of coffee between them. They both had their feet propped up on the same third chair. Lucy’s were in the seat and Wyatt’s rested on the arm. The silence was comfortable and the little conversation they managed was casual. It may seem like an average occurrence but, until recently, it hadn’t been. In the early days of sharing the bunker with Lucy, this had been the norm. But then Jessica came along and it was shattered just like everything else. Shared space was a pipe dream for Wyatt up until last week.

Now, it was his reality again as long as he could avoid screwing it all up a second—or was it third?—time.

“This is nice,” he told her as he closed one report and reached for another.

She glanced up from the letter for a moment give him a crooked smirk. “What’s nice about it?” She asked. “We’re not doing anything.”

He nodded. “Exactly. It’s nice. Just sitting here with you in the quiet. You know? Just  _ existing _ together. No alarms going off, no strategy meetings to fight Emma’s latest curveball. Just... _ us. _ ”

She chuckled as her smirk turned into an affectionate grin. “You’re such a softie, Wyatt Logan.”

He blushed and looked away from her with a modest shrug. “Just don’t spread that around, huh? I got a reputation to worry about.”

She rolled her eyes at him with a chuffing laugh. “I hate to break it to you, Sweetheart, but everyone already knows.”

His brow furrowed at her. “What? How?”

She looked up at him and motioned to his eyes. “It’s those baby blues. They give you away.”

“Yeah, to  _ you _ , Babydoll,” he said with a lopsided grin. “Not to everyone.”

“Sure, you keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel more masculine,” Lucy told him with a teasing quirk of her brow.

“Trust me, I have no worries about my masculinity, ma’am,” Wyatt replied with a wink. “Especially after 1941.”

It was a risk to bring up that starry night that felt like so long ago, but it paid off. Her eyes brightened and her cheeks flushed.

“Oh my god,” she said with a loud guffaw. “You did not. Wow, that was  _ shameless _ .”

“Wasn’t ashamed of it then, and I’m certainly not ashamed of it now,” he told her with a slow smirk.

He saw the mirth in her eyes and waited for her to fire back at him. He knew there was some sort of snarky banter on the tip of her tongue. 

But he never got a chance to find out what it was. Agent Christopher chose that moment to storm into the room. Her face formed a pensive stare that was focused on Lucy as she closed in on their table.

“Something  _ interesting _ just happened,” Christopher told her with a purposefully blank face.

“Interesting, how?” Wyatt asked. “On a scale of one to ten? One being John Wilkes Booth had a famous brother and ten being Emma taking out all the Department’s security and stealing the Mothership.”

Denise sighed tiredly but obliged him. “A weak seven.”

Lucy’s eyebrows lifted in intrigue. “What happened?”

“Noah called up our San Francisco office and confessed to being Rittenhouse.”

Lucy merely blinked at Agent Christopher for several seconds. “I—wha— _ Noah? _ ”

Wyatt scoffed and shook his head. “I always knew there was something  _ off _ about that guy.”

“Yes,” Agent Christopher told him with a knowing glance. Her tone was dry as she spoke. “ _ That’s _ why you never liked him, sure. It had nothing to do with the engagement ring on Lucy’s finger.” She didn’t wait for his response as she breezed right through to the heart of the matter. “There’s a problem with Noah, though.”

“What problem?” Lucy asked. “He confessed. That should be it, right? You just go and get him.”

Wyatt shook his head. “The Doc ran, didn’t he?”

“He left a location for a meet but he said he won’t speak with me or any of my agents,” Denise told them with a nod.

Lucy rolled her eyes and huffed. “No, don’t tell me. Let me guess. He’ll only meet with  _ me _ , right?”

An answer wasn’t needed. Wyatt could see the answer in the grim resignation on Denise’s face. Well,  _ shit _ . 

“No,” Wyatt answered immediately. “Absolutely not.”

Lucy turned a quirked brow and a stern frown in his direction. “I’m sorry, what was that? That sounded like you were answering a question  _ for  _ me.”

He winced and then gave her an apologetic glance. “No, that’s not what I meant. I...I meant you  _ shouldn’t _ do it. It’s up to you but that’s my  _ professional  _ opinion.”

“But if he has knowledge we could use then we have to question him and if he’s contributed to any of what they’ve done he should be in custody,” Lucy told him adamantly.

“Yeah, and he will be. But the right decision would be to let Agent Christopher and DHS track him down. He can’t be  _ that _ good at living off the grid. He’s not Flynn,” Wyatt argued. He was trying his best to remain calm and to patiently explain to Lucy why this was too risky.

“I’m sorry, but why would I ask her to waste the manpower when I can draw him out right now?” Lucy asked as she crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back in her chair. She looked sure, confident -  _ determined _ .

That was almost the limit for his cool because there was no talking her out of something when she got like this. Her determination and confidence was why he was now stuck sharing a bunker with Garcia Flynn  _ indefinitely _ . She really thought this was the best option? She had to know that he wouldn’t want her to do this.

“You can’t actually believe you need to—Lucy, this is clearly a trap,” Wyatt told her with a brow furrowed in concern. “It’s a trap set  _ for you _ . You may not have known Noah long but you and I both know you thought about exploring that connection. You see the good in him. You don’t think  _ Rittenhouse _ knows that? They’re using him to get to you.”

“There’s a chance it isn’t a trap,” she told him. “There’s a chance he wants to help us but doesn’t trust Homeland Security. He knows me, Wyatt. Of course he would want to talk to me.”

Wyatt looked between Lucy and Agent Christopher in disbelief before he scoffed at them and banged a tense fist against the table. “Yeah, and there’s also a chance they could take you  _ again _ . Hell, they may not even bother with that this time. They might do something much  _ worse _ . Emma still has a price on your head, remember?”

Lucy’s hand appeared on top of his fist and squeezed gently. Wyatt opened his hand and Lucy laced her fingers through his. “Then you should go with Christopher’s agents. You know they’re not going to send me in there without eyes on me. Be those eyes, Wyatt. There’s no one better at having my back than you.”

“Or you could listen to me for once,” Wyatt suggested weakly. He knew they were well passed that.

“Is this because of the danger or is this because it’s  _ Noah _ ?” Lucy asked him with a tired sigh.

“Both,” he answered honestly as he slumped back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. He was pouting and he knew it but this situation was high on risk and low on reward. He didn’t want to do it but it wasn’t his choice. “I don’t like Noah. Never have. For multiple reasons. I had a bad vibe about him before I even met him. I especially don’t like him now that we know he’s Rittenhouse. That affiliation opens up a whole different can of worms. Why is he contacting Homeland now? Where has he been since Rittenhouse was outed? Has he been helping Emma all this time and we didn’t know it? Could he be helping her now? I don’t know the answers to any of these questions, Lucy, and that makes me nervous. No one can protect you without at least  _ some _ of this information.”

“Okay, but that leaves us at an impasse then because according to Agent Christopher we’re not going to get any of that information unless I meet with him,” Lucy told him with a quirked brow. 

She had a point. He hated that she had a point.

He nodded with an impassive expression. He was  _ pissed _ . Not at Lucy but at the entire situation. There were too many unpredictable variables. He didn’t like it. But he didn’t want Lucy to see any of that and misunderstand. He was on thin ice as it was. He glanced up at Agent Christopher with a sigh.

“And she has to go in  _ alone _ ?” He asked.

“He won’t show otherwise,” Denise answered.

“Have you checked out the location he sent us?” Wyatt asked.

“It’s a diner. Typically a very busy one,” she answered again. “We can have eyes and ears set up in the booth before he arrives. We’ll know exactly what’s happening at all times. But, she’s right, if you’re worried come with us. You can wait in the surveillance van with me.”

Wyatt shook his head at her. “No. I’ll wait in the diner.”

“Wyatt, he knows your face,” Lucy said with a sigh. “And he’s not very fond of it.”

“It’s mutual,” he replied with a smirk. “I’ll sit out of sight. In the back. If he makes a move I don’t like then I’m close by. Sitting helpless in a van is too far away.”

Christopher nodded. She must have known there was no use arguing with him. 

Lucy’s jaw tightened and her arms crossed over her chest. “Fine. But you stay hidden unless he  _ actually _ tries something stupid. Okay? Let  _ me _ handle him otherwise.”

He nodded solemnly. He would take her request as serious as a direct order. “Yes, ma’am.”

He was still trying to gain her trust back even if there was a little more intimacy these days. She needed to see that he could respect her space and trust her instincts. If he did this right he could help their relationship instead of hurt it. 

“I follow  _ your _ lead, Lucy.”

Her stern frown tilted upward by a fraction and her eyes softened. 

“As if you had any other option, Soldier,” she said with a teasing glare.

He chuckled at her as she stood from her chair to go get ready. “Yeah, well, that’s the only way to keep the peace with a bossy know it all around.”

“I’m pretty sure you have that the wrong way around,” she told him with a smirk.

He met her eyes with a soft smile and nodded his agreement. “I’m pretty sure you’re right.”

She blushed and gifted him with a full soft smile like he had only seen once before. It filled his chest with hope and left him feeling like those three little words weren’t too far out of reach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: quick update before my vacation actually starts! I plan to focus on this story once I'm back from vacation so that I can finish it now that Habit is complete. So look for more updates on All In in the future! Hope you liked it! Let me know in the comment box! I'd love to talk to you about it!
> 
> angellwings


	15. Chapter 15

The diner was off the beaten path. It was busy, sure, but it was outside of the city. Far enough outside that it would be easy to escape security cameras if you wanted. If, say, you were planning to grab someone and sneak out the back. This did not bode well for Noah. Not in Wyatt's eyes at least.

He walked in a half hour before Lucy was set to arrive and picked a booth in the back. He could see the whole restaurant but was hidden enough to not be noticed unless he wanted to be. He hid himself behind a newspaper and ordered a meal so as not to look suspicious. He noticed when Noah entered the diner and watched him pick a table. He picked a corner booth without any sort of thought or hesitation. He had clearly researched this place before suggesting it as their meet up location.

That was also concerning. Who knew if he or Rittenhouse stashed anything here or made any further plans together. He would have to keep his head on a swivel during this meeting. They could have unexpected guests.

Noah made no phone calls, spoke with no one else, made no eye contact with any other customers. Nothing suspicious. Finally, Lucy entered. Wyatt told her not to look for him and to focus on Noah like she had no idea Wyatt was there. The last thing they needed was for Noah to suspect she had back up. She followed his advice and headed straight for Noah's table with a concentrated gaze.

Wyatt was forced to watch as Noah put on his most charming front for Lucy. Lucy for her part was patient and kind but carefully avoided being overly familiar with Noah. He reached for her hand, she pulled hers away. He reached out to caress her face and she angled her body away from him. Eventually, Noah took the hint and stopped reaching for her altogether much to Wyatt's relief.

His phone buzzed and he checked it quickly. He had no comms to over hear their conversation so any updates came from Christopher via text.

" _Noah claims to have roster of current members. Says he also has intel from Emma on how to save Amy._ "

Of course he would say that. Emma and Rittenhouse knew Lucy's weaknesses. Amy was her biggest one.

" _Says he would have left Rittenhouse long ago if he knew they were going to target her. Says he wants to defect."_

Bullshit. _Bull. Shit_.

He watched Lucy and Noah talk for a few more moments before she reached for her phone. Noah stopped her by placing his hand over hers. He said something else and Wyatt watched doubt shift across Lucy's face. She shook her head at him and his phone buzzes.

" _She tried to call me to come and take him in. Said he would only go in if she took him personally."_

Oh hell no. That wasn't happening. He had a feeling Lucy told him the same thing. He caught subtle movement from Noah and knew something wasn't right. Noah's soft demeanor hardened and his eyes narrowed into a glare. A waitress approached the table next to Lucy, blocking her from his view. In the next moment Lucy was standing with Noah.

No update from Christopher. So he texted her.

"What's going on? What was said? They're leaving."

" _Nothing. No one said anything."_

He bit back a groan and dropped cash on the table. Fucking great. The waitress led Lucy toward the kitchen with Noah close behind them. Wyatt followed after a beat. This couldn't be good. He slipped through the back door, that was left cracked open, and just as he did heard Lucy shout.

" _Wyatt! Look out!"_

He ducked and dodged and pulled out his side arm just as a bullets rained down around him. He took cover behind the dumpster in the back alley as quickly as he could.

"Lucy!" He yelled. Respond, come on.

"Wyatt!"

Further away. Down the alley toward the street. God damn it. He glanced around the dumpster to see a car at the end of the alley and Noah pushing Lucy toward it with a gun at her back. The waitress and another woman were on the other side of the car with guns aimed in his direction.

He was cornered. The only exit he had was back into the restaurant which took him further away from Lucy. Not an option.

Lucy would have to do something. He was pinned down. He'd shown her a few moves and hopefully she—

He heard a startled cry and a grunt and the sound of something clattering against the pavement. He risked a step forward to get a better look. Lucy was standing over Noah with his gun in her hand. One of the women was unconscious on the ground and her gun and slid into the alley a few feet from him. Wyatt beamed proudly at her and then raced forward to pick up the fumbled gun and aim his at the other woman at the front of the car.

"You good?" Wyatt asked her as his expression turned somber again.

She nodded as she took in a shaky breath. "I'm good."

Just then the Homeland Security van pulled up to block Noah's car. Christopher and a group of agents exited the van. They apprehended Noah and the two women. Wyatt lowered his weapon and then approached Lucy slowly. The gun was still pointed ahead of her but her grip had loosened. He knew it wasn't the first time she had held or even fired a gun but still she looked dazed.

"Lucy?" He asked tentatively.

He took the gun from her and handed it to one of the agents. She turned and met his gaze with red watery eyes.

"He—he wanted to kill you and take me. The waitress was Rittenhouse. She spotted you as soon as you walked in. They had it all planned and timed," she told him with a furrowed brow.

"Take you?" Wyatt asked as he stepped into her space. "To Emma?"

"No," she answered. She handed him a letter from her pocket with trembling hands. "He wanted to protect me from Emma and Rittenhouse and...and you."

The letter confirmed what she told him in two paragraphs. It was too wordy. Too pompous. But not as insane as he expected. Noah's words seemed sincere and he laid out his reasons rationally. And, honestly, Wyatt had been tempted to take Lucy away from all of this himself. If the guy loved her, or some version of her, the way he claimed to then he could almost understand.

"You were right, Wyatt," she conceded. "It was a trap."

"But you were right too," Wyatt told her as he pocketed the letter and then wrapped his arms around her waist. "You could handle it. You _did_ handle it. I was cornered and _you_ took Noah out."

"But if I hadn't...if he'd gotten me into that car—"

"You're safe, Luce," Wyatt assured her as he placed a hand under her chin and tilted her face up so her eyes met his. "The what-ifs are unimportant. Noah's in custody and you're here with me. You did it."

"You don't seem surprised," Lucy said as her dazed expression gave way to a softer curious one.

"I'm not," he said with a warm smile. "You can do anything. You're the only person who doesn't seem to know that. My worry earlier had nothing to do with doubting you. I hope you realize that. I just...we've come so close to losing each other so many times. I can't do that again, Lucy. I can't risk losing you any more."

She didn't reply to him instead she launched herself at him for a tight embrace. He returned it for as long as he could before Christopher came to direct them to their ride back to the bunker.

"You should be proud of what you did today, Lucy," Christopher told her as they reached the car. "Because of you we have three threats in custody. Excellent work."

"Thank you," Lucy said quietly as she stepped into the car.

Wyatt and Christopher exchanged worried looks as he slid in after her. He slipped his hand into hers and laced their fingers together. "She's right. You should be proud. This was a good day."

"A good day where my ex-fiancé I barely knew tried to abduct me because a tyrannical cult wants to kill me? Is that how we're judging a good day now? Is that the kind of life we're going to live now?" She asked him with a furrowed brow. "I remember when a good day used to mean I'd caught up grading papers or had a productive day of writing. Is this...is this who I am now? Is this who I'm going to be forever?"

Her eyes began to water and she shook her head as the car pulled away from the curb. "I'm tired, Wyatt. I'm so tired of looking over my shoulder. I'll do it. I'll fight and be vigilant because I _have_ to but I can't sustain that forever. I need to know this fight will end someday."

"I can't promise you it will end, Lucy," Wyatt said sadly before he pulled her into his arms. "There's no way I can know that. But I will promise you this, if you ever want to leave - if this becomes too much for you - let me know and we'll leave. We'll let someone else fight the good fight and you and I will take a much needed rest, okay? I don't care where and I don't care when. If you want out all you have to do is say the word and you and I are gone. Deal?"

She pulled back from him to find his eyes and gave him a shocked glance. "You'd walk out in the middle of a war and leave a fight unfinished...for me?"

"If it would make you happy then it would make me happy," he told her softly before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. "Where you go I follow. That's all there is to it. Besides, we've both sacrificed and fought and lost more than any two people should."

She blinked at him for a moment in surprise and awe. "You're serious." It wasn't a question. It was a realization of facts.

"I want more of what we had this morning," he told her. "Quiet and comfortable moments between the two of us are few and far between so I'll do whatever it takes to get us there."

She bit her bottom lip and then smiled warmly. "I want more of that too." She brought her hands up to frame his face and then pulled him in for a kiss, soft and slow. When the kiss ended she pressed her forehead to his. "Thank you, Wyatt. Thank you for being there today and for standing back and letting me do this myself. I know that was hard for you."

"Always happy to help, ma'am," he told her with an earnest glance and a grin. "Anything fo—"

Her lips on his effectively cut off his sentence. This kiss was more intrusive - _hungry_ \- but still shorter than he would have liked. When her mouth left his he tried to pull her back in but she chuckled and held him at bay.

"You were saying?" Lucy asked. Before he could answer she held up a hand and shook her head with a teasing smile on her face. "No, wait. Let me guess. Anything for you, right? That's what you were going to say, isn't it?"

"What can I say? I'm nothing if not reliable."

Lucy's gaze turned tender as she nodded her agreement. "Yes, I'm starting to remember that now."

He coudn't help but read additional meaning into her words. Remember implied that what they once were wasn't totally lost and that her former trust in him wasn't completely broken. She was rebuilding it, he knew that, but it seemed the foundation was still there. He thought maybe those three words weren't so far away that morning, but now he _knew_. Hope in their future no longer felt like a risk. They would get there. He knew they would. He just needed to be a patient a little while longer and he could certainly do that. _For her_.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** SURPRISE. EXTRA IMPULSIVE UPDATE. Spent today writing this and couldn't wait to post it after the amazing response you guys gave me on the latest HS AU chapter. This chapter is WAY longer than the last few so hopefully you enjoy that. I think it'll be worth it. ;)
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Angellwings

* * *

They were supposed to have a progress meeting about saving Henry Wallace and Amy Preston but as Wyatt and Rufus approached the Lifeboat Silo they heard loud joyful laughter. They exchanged curious grins as they turned the corner and found Lucy crushing Jiya with a hug.

"You did it!"

"It's just step one, Lucy. It doesn't solve the whole problem," Jiya told her as she hugged Lucy in return.

"I don't care! It's the first step and the most important one! Jiya, you are brilliant!"

"You've been telling us all along that Rittenhouse's plans are all about pressure points. All I did was look for the pressure point that would put the Wallaces and the Cahills in the same place," Jiya replied modestly. "No big deal."

"What's going on?" Wyatt asked with a curious narrowed gaze.

Lucy spun on her heels and bounded across the silo, wrapping her arms around him with a little hop. He caught her easily and held tight.

"Jiya figured out how to save my dad!" Lucy exclaimed. "You were right! I needed to ask my friends for help. I can't do this without you and Jiya and Rufus."

She pulled back from his hold on her and placed a quick celebratory kiss on his lips. "First my dad and then Amy! We can do this!"

"Of course we can," He agreed with a confident grin. "How do we do it?"

He'd do anything Lucy suggested as long as she stayed this happy.

"My problem last time was that I was so emotionally involved I couldn't see the whole picture. I knew where the Wallaces and the Cahills would be and I knew Emma would be there to prevent whatever we tried to do and I was so stuck on that and I didn't think — well, I just didn't think," Lucy said with a furrowed brow and a sigh.

"Right," Rufus said with a nod. "Last we talked about it, we knew the Wallaces were all killed in 1962 in an accident."

"They were in a hotel elevator that fell down the shaft due to a faulty cable," Wyatt recalled with a thick swallow. Accident his ass. Emma did that. Sabotaged the elevator to take out, not just Henry, but his entire family and anyone else on that elevator. While on vacation.

"We thought about keeping them from getting on the elevator at all," Jiya reminded them. "But the Wallaces got on just before the elevator hit full occupancy and prevented the Cahills from getting on. If we kept the Wallaces away then The Cahills would die in that accident instead."

"As much as I hate letting Henry die, I couldn't do that to Ethan," Lucy said as she worried her bottom lip. "So, then we talked about preventing the elevator from falling at all but then I found that photo from the scene and we saw The Cahills standing next to—"

"Emma," Wyatt finished for her. "A failsafe. If the elevator didn't fall then we were certain she'd take the Cahills out herself."

"And that's where we got stuck," Rufus said with a huff.

"Exactly, we were stuck because we stopped looking for the pressure points," Jiya told them all with a smirk. "It hit me this morning, how did the Wallaces and the Cahills end up in the same place in the first place? That wasn't how it went originally, according to Lucy. Emma had to do something to convince both families to vacation in the same place at the same time. So, if we can't undo the accident all at once then we can undo the pieces, right? The reason we can't stop the accident all together is because Emma has a failsafe, so if we're undoing the pieces then—"

"Then we undo the failsafe," Rufus agreed.

"We keep the Cahills from ever being in the same place at the same time as the Wallaces," Wyatt said with a wide grin. "That's smart. It means multiple jumps to save Amy but...it should work. Lucy's right, Jiya. You're brilliant."

"The best part is that Ethan already knows us," Lucy said with a beaming smile. "1962 is just eight years after we met him for the first time. Maybe we can't tell him all the details but he'll trust what we _can_ tell him!"

"Do you think Emma would expect us to try that?" Wyatt asked worriedly.

"Maybe," Rufus told him. "We could try it from both ends just in case. Split up when we get there. You guys find the Cahills and Jiya and I will try to talk to the Wallaces. That way we stand a better chance if Emma's waiting for us to talk to one of the two."

Lucy launched herself at Rufus the same way she crushed Jiya earlier. "Thank you! Thank you all so much. I know it's just the first steps but it's closer than I've been to saving Amy in so long."

Rufus smiled softly and patted Lucy's back as he returned the hug. "One way or another, Lucy, we'll help you get her back. You deserve it."

"No time like the present, Professor," Wyatt told her with a smirk. "Let me get my holster and we can go."

"We'll prep the Lifeboat," Rufus said as he led Jiya toward the Lifeboat monitors.

Wyatt turned to go and heard rushed light steps following after him. As he reached the bunker kitchen he turned, knowing exactly what he'd find. His arms wrapped around a buzzing Lucy Preston almost instantly. She kissed him for the second time that morning and then rested her forehead against his.

"Thank you," she told him in a hushed tone.

"I didn't do anything," he assured her. "It was all you and Jiya."

"That's where you're wrong," she replied as she ran a hand through his hair. He couldn't help but lean into her touch. "Without you I would have given up completely or done something drastic. We're making progress because _you_ talked me down, Wyatt. Whether you believe it or not, this is all because of you."

"I just want you to be happy, Lucy. That's all I want."

She met his eyes and took a deep breath. Her gaze was reflective, and when she finally responded his breath nearly caught in his throat.

The color of her eyes brightened from an ash brown to a warm cinnamon as she spoke. "I believe you."

She believed him. One step closer.

"We're going to save her, Lucy. Her and Henry and hopefully your mother too."

"You can't promise that, Wyatt," Lucy said with a wan smile.

"You said that you believe I want you to be happy then believe me when I tell you that we're going to do this," he said as he brought one of her hands to his lips and kissed her palm. "Okay?"

Her eyes watered but she nodded and smiled faintly. "Okay."

* * *

They found Ethan in 1962 and vaguely requested that he take his wife and son somewhere else on vacation. They told him enough to know that danger was involved but not enough to indicate what might have happened. He agreed. Jiya and Rufus had no luck with the Wallaces. Turns out total strangers are a bit wary when you try to subtle talk to them about their upcoming ski vacation.

The Lifeboat touched down with Mason and Christopher waiting.

"Did it work?" Rufus asked as they descended the Lifeboat steps.

"How can we tell?" Mason asked.

"The accident photo," Jiya said as she rushed across the silo and found the photo on her stack of research materials. "It's changed."

They all caught up with her quickly and looked over her shoulder at the photo of the crowd surrounding the accident. Emma was still there, but the Cahills weren't.

"Her failsafe is gone," Wyatt told Lucy with a confident smirk.

"And now we just have to stop the accident," Lucy said as she beamed at him.

"The Lifeboat needs four hours to charge," Rufus told them. "As soon as it's charged we'll go."

"Provided Emma hasn't jumped by then," Christopher said sternly. "She and Rittenhouse are still our top priority."

Jiya grinned at Christopher and shrugged. "Have a little faith. She held off this long. Who's to say she won't hold off for four more hours?"

Jiya was right to have faith. Four hours later the Lifeboat was charged and they were off to a ski resort in Aspen. There wasn't time to figure out how Emma had sabotaged the elevator or even when, but they knew when the Wallaces would be loading the elevator. They decided to simplify. Denise found Wyatt's FBI badge from the lunar landing mission in storage with Homeland Security. Agent Mulder alerted the manager to a threat to his guests safety. Stating they'd received a tip that someone had tampered with his elevators. Resort security and maintenance blocked off the shafts and found the problem. The cable had been weakened.

Emma was still there and still after the Wallaces. They ended up in an exchange with her a few hired thugs. Wyatt was forced to watch as Emma and Lucy scuffled. Emma had the upper hand but Lucy was resourceful. Wyatt would have helped but he was occupied himself. He always ended up fighting the big guys.

Before it was over Lucy had a gun aimed at Emma's chest and she was the last man standing of her crew. Emma dropped, swept her leg under Lucy, and then ran as Lucy crashed to the ground.

"You okay?" Wyatt asked as he helped her stand.

"I'm fine. Go! I'll catch up. We need to make sure she gets in the Mothership and gets out of here. Please," Lucy said as she waved him off and then pointed after Emma.

He nodded and ran. He chased Emma across the resort and into the nearby woods until a gleaming white orb came into view. By the time he was close enough the oMothership was starting up and taking off. As soon as it popped out of existence, Wyatt turned around and went back.

Rufus and Jiya were checking on the Wallaces while Lucy waited in the lobby.

"You didn't want to go?" Wyatt asked her.

"If all goes the way it should, I thought it best he not see me. I don't want to risk anything going wrong during part three of this mission," she told him. "1979 is seventeen years away. If he sees me now and then sees me then and I haven't aged a day then I think he might be suspicious. Don't you?"

She was right, of course. She was always right. Besides, the Wallaces had already met Jiya and Rufus one time that same year. They wouldn't be expecting them to age, if they remembered them at all.

They had the same tense journey back the present as they had before. When they stepped out of the Lifeboat, Lucy grabbed a tablet from Mason and immediately searched for Henry Wallace.

"He still married someone else," she told the room. "He still died in the late nineties, but at least now he's back at Berkeley. He's near my mother again. We're back to needing one jump to fix it."

The relief in the room was palpable and he could see the tension lift from Lucy's body.

"One more thing left to do then," Wyatt said with a supportive smile.

"We can actually do this, can't we?" She asked him in dazed shock. "Saving Amy is actually possible now."

Rufus nodded. "In four hours we can find Carol and Henry and reintroduce them like you wanted to do before you went missing. You'll have a sister out there waiting for you somewhere after that and everything will be what it was before the Hindenburg."

"I'll have a sister out there," Lucy repeated. Her dazed joy darkened. Her eyes had been a warm cinnamon shade since their talk earlier but now the ash had returned. "A sister out there who would be a pawn for Rittenhouse to use against me. They could take her, hurt her, or...god, if they tried to do to her what they tried to do to me I wouldn't be able to-to live with myself."

Understanding passed over Rufus and Christopher's faces and even Wyatt felt the truth in her words. They tried that with Jessica. They used her to put a wedge in the team and it had nearly worked. They threatened Rufus's brother and mother and Christopher's family too. Their outside connections were their liabilities. She was right. It was a horrible truth but she was right.

"I—I can't bring her back to this. Back to a world where she would be on the run from Rittenhouse. I can't do that to her," Lucy said with a furrowed brow. "I can't save her just to lose her again. I can't save her till we take out Rittenhouse."

"Lucy, that could be... _years_ from now," Christopher reminded her. "Really think about this."

A tear silently fell down her cheek and he watched as she angrily wiped it away. "I am thinking about it. I can't save her just to risk losing her again."

"We could protect her," Wyatt offered. "She could live here with us."

"Yeah, I mean if Time Terrorist and a not-dead wife can share our bunker than a not-dead sister can," Rufus said with an eager nod.

Wyatt reached out and threaded his fingers through Lucy's. "We have four hours till the Lifeboat's refueled. Give it at least that long to think about it. Don't give up on me now, ma'am."

"I—I'll think about it," Lucy promised with a thick swallow.

"Good enough for me," Wyatt replied before he turned to face the rest of the group. "Come on, let's all clean up and get some rest, yeah? It's been a long day."

Wyatt pulled Lucy out of the silo and into the common area. He stopped briefly in the kitchen with a warm glance. "Tea first or shower?"

"Shower," she told him. He quirked a suggestive brow at her and she laughed softly. She rolled her eyes playfully at him. " _Alone."_

"Right, alone, got it," he said with a smirk. "Can't blame a guy for dreaming."

Lucy shook her head at him and walked away with a low chuckle. He watched her head down the hallway to her room before heading toward his own. Technically, he and Rufus still shared a room and she and Jiya still shared a room, but in reality…

She and Rufus had all but officially swapped rooms. If she didn't sleep in his arms then she slept on Rufus' old cot, but her belongings were still in the room she was supposed to share with Jiya. He got his change of clothes and shower kit together and then sat down in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. Once Lucy was done it would be his turn. He never minded taking a shower after Lucy. The bathroom always smelled like her shampoo when it was his turn.

Lucy walked through the common area twenty minutes later in his borrowed sweats with her shower caddy in her hand. He stared wide eyed at her for a long moment. When had she taken those? She was back to wearing his clothes around the bunker?

She cleared her throat and grinned knowingly at him. "Bathroom's all yours, Wyatt."

He blinked and shook himself out of the very heated thoughts running through his brain. "Right, yes. Thanks."

As she passed him she lightly ran her hand across his back and then leaned toward his ear to whisper. "Meet you in your room when you're done."

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am," he agreed with an excited nod. She laughed at him as he stood quickly and practically sprinted for the bathroom. He didn't know where her melancholy mood had gone but he was happy to enjoy lighthearted Lucy Preston as often as he could.

He didn't think he had ever showered and changed quicker in his life. He stepped into his room, in his sweats and t-shirt that were a near exact match to Lucy's, and found her sipping tea while sitting cross legged on his cot with a brick of a book in her lap.

"Reading anything interesting?" He asked as he leaned against the open door.

"Sense and Sensibility," she answered automatically. "It was Amy's favorite. She thought this book was about me and her. She used to say Eleanor reminded her of me because it was frustrating to watch her give up what she wanted for the sake of sense and control."

He gave her a confused look. "And that's why it was her favorite?" That didn't seem very flattering. Though, it was _very_ true.

Lucy closed the book, patted the cot, and then smiled gently at him. "No, it was her favorite because Eleanor gets a happy ending and she liked to imagine that the same would happen for me someday."

"It'll happen," he assured her as he sat down next to her. "In fact, it could happen in a few hours depending on what you decide."

"Wyatt," she said with a sigh and a warning tone.

"Okay, okay, I get it, but if you want to talk about it… **.** "

She stared at him with her sad ash brown eyes and let his sentence trail off. He thought that was going to be the end of it. He thought she would let it drop and go back to her book, but she kept staring. Eventually, her reluctant gaze turned resigned. She set aside the book and her tea and then leaned into him. He felt her arms wrap around his middle and her head rest against his shoulder. Finally, she spoke.

"I know living here seems like the better alternative to not existing but you don't know Amy like I do. She's an extrovert who loves adventure and risk. Being stuck here would be _hell_ for her. And there's no guarantee we would reach her before Rittenhouse. I could come back and she could be one of them or they could have abducted her to get to me...any number of horrible things. How can I save her just to put her in even more danger?"

"But she'd be _alive_ , Lucy. This may be your only chance to make sure that happens. What if Emma decides to mess with Henry Wallace's timeline again? What if she jumps and we miss our window? I don't want you to have any regrets and I'm afraid that you will if we don't do this now," he cautioned her as he tightened an arm around her shoulders.

He kissed the top of her head and let the silence fall between them. He could feel her contemplation as she curled further into him.

"What if she comes back and she's not the Amy I knew?" She asked him in a small fearful voice.

"She will be."

"Was Jessica the woman you knew?" She asked curiously.

He would like to say yes. They didn't part on horrible terms. They mutually agreed to separate. But the minute he first saw her, deep down he knew, she was different. It wasn't just darker and shorter hair. She was hardened, bitter. His Jessica hadn't been those things, not while he knew her.

"No," he said with a mournful sigh. "She wasn't."

"Then how can you say Amy won't be different?"

"Because she's a Preston and Preston women have unbelievable wills," he told her confidently. "You have no training to resist programming Lucy, but you _did_. Your mother stood up for you. She made mistakes but in the end she chose you. She defied Rittenhouse _for you_. If you and your mother have that strength then Amy does too."

"I hope you're right," she whispered.

"I am," he said firmly as he turned his head and kissed her temple. He kept his hold on her as he stretched them both out across the cot. "Keep thinking about it while we get some sleep, okay?"

She nodded against him but said nothing. She tucked her head into him and he felt her breathing slow and deepen. Once he was certain she was asleep he let himself drift off too. This was a vital moment for Lucy. This was the moment she chose to keep her faith or lose it. He hoped, for her sake, she kept it. She deserved every happiness and that included Amy.

Four hours later, he awoke to knocking at his bedroom door. He untangled himself from Lucy and answered the door to find Rufus on the other side.

"It's time. You think she's ready?" He asked.

"Guess, we'll find out. We'll meet you in the kitchen," he promised.

Rufus nodded and then retreated back down the hall. Wyatt closed the door and then crawled back into bed next to Lucy. He brought her back to his chest and wrapped his arms around her, pressing his face into her hair and taking a whiff. He so desperately wanted to offer her all of his strength. He wanted her to have the courage to save Amy. He wanted her to fight for what she truly wanted. He wanted to _help her_ fight for what she truly wanted.

She woke on her own a few minutes later and turned in his arms to face him. Her hands trailed up his arms and into his hair and then he felt her light touch across his jaw and his prickly stubble.

"Time to get up, Professor," he said with an easy smile.

She squinted at him through a half lidded gaze and then mumbled something he couldn't hear.

He chuckled and nuzzled his nose against hers. "What was that?"

"I said, I'm ready," she said as she forced herself to open her eyes. "Let's go save Amy."

His eyes and spirits brightened at the sound of those words. He kissed her lips happily before nodding and replying. "Whatever you want, babydoll."

"That's what I was hoping you'd say, sweetheart."

* * *

They did it. They introduced Carol and Henry. They orchestrated a "meet-cute", as Jiya called it, at the campus library. Both Carol and Henry were stubborn at first and had other things on their schedule so wrangling them into the same place and time felt almost like herding cats. But they managed it.

Now, they were sitting in the Lifeboat as it powered down in the present.

Lucy took a deep breath and stared at the closed hatch.

"What if we open that hatch and everything is exactly the same?" She asked them with a furrowed brow. "I—I'm not sure I want to know."

Rufus nodded. "Uh, well, then we might have a problem. Because as much as I love all of you, I'm not living in a metal orb with you for the rest of my life. It's hard enough living in the bunker."

"He's right," Jiya said with a grin. "Besides, there's no bathroom in this thing and I have to pee."

Wyatt reached over and started to unbuckle Lucy's seatbelts. "If it helps," he told her. "We'll go first."

"Okay," she agreed with a gulp. "You guys go first."

Wyatt squeezed her hands with a reassuring glance before the hatch began to open. Rufus and Jiya stepped through the hatch and then Wyatt followed. He grinned slowly at the sight that greeted them. There was no doubt their mission had succeeded because standing at the monitors, between Mason and Christopher, was Amy Preston. The woman he'd only seen in one small wrinkled photo from Lucy's locket was standing on the other side of the silo.

He heard the clink of Lucy's shoes against the metal stairs behind him and turned quickly to try and get a look at her face as she spotted her sister. Relief and joy flooded her face and caused tears to pool in her eyes. Wyatt hurried down the stairs to get out of Lucy's way and as soon as he did she raced across the silo and ambushed Amy with a huge hug, as only Lucy Preston could do.

"Are you okay? Lucy?" Amy asked with concern. "What happened? You're scaring me."

"Nothing happened," Wyatt answered. "She's fine. Just a close call."

"So, the usual, then?" Amy said as she returned her sister's hug.

"Yeah," Rufus replied with a wide smile. "The usual."


	17. Chapter 17

"Okay, what's going on with you and soldier boy?" Amy asked as she poured Lucy another glass of wine.

They ended up telling her about the timeline shift. Lucy was too emotional to try and come up with a cover story. Besides, with Amy the truth was always best. She could sniff out a lie like no one else. The same thing applied to Amy's current question.

Wyatt had sacrificed his room so she and Amy could have the night together. He was sleeping on the couch, which was apparently Amy's bed most nights. Amy was asking every intrusive question she could think of. All of this felt so weirdly normal and Lucy hadn't felt _normal_ in far too long.

"I mean, I know his not-so-dead wife coming back really screwed with the two of you but don't you think it's time you face up to how you _still_ feel about him?" Amy asked her. "It's clear he's crazy about you."

"I know what I feel, Amy, I'm just...I'm not sure I can trust it," she admitted.

"Trust him, you mean?" Amy asked.

"I trust him with my life but trusting him with my heart...that's easier said than done, you know?" Lucy told her.

"You've never really trusted anyone with that, have you?" She asked. "Certainly not Jonas and if you were going to trust anyone with it, he's the best option in your history."

Okay, so Amy had never known Noah. There was an answer to one of a million questions she had about Amy's timeline verses her own. "Yeah, right, Jonas."

"I still can't believe that dick wouldn't give you tenure. I bet it was purely because you ended things with him." Amy shook her head and rolled her eyes. "He never deserved you anyway. But Wyatt on the other hand…"

"Amy," Lucy said with a tired sigh.

"Look, I know the guy made some mistakes. You don't know how I felt about that at first, not anymore, but I promise you I was the first one to want to beat the shit out of him for running off the way he did. Still, he's been there for you at every turn since he realized he and Jessica weren't right for each other. He chose you. It may have taken him too fucking long, but he did. He dove headfirst into that choice and he's let you set the pace. I mean, he's won _me_ over and, let me tell you, that was no easy task," She said as she refilled her own glass. "He's _serious_."

"Are we going to spend the whole night talking about Wyatt?" She asked. "I just got you back. I want to hear what you've been up to in this timeline. I want to hear about you and me, the bad and the good."

Amy huffed but nodded. "Fine, I'll get you to admit how you feel about Wyatt some other time. We're not done with this."

"Of course not," Lucy said with a chuckle. So far it was the same old Amy. "In this timeline, what happened with mom?"

Amy bit her bottom lip and took a deep fortifying breath. "Cancer. Yours?"

Lucy debated telling her the truth, but the truth seemed too cruel so she told her a version of the truth. "Rittenhouse. She saved me from them."

"So no matter what, we lose mom?" Amy asked with a hopeless sigh. "I'm sorry, Lucy."

"I'm sorry too. Mom was sick in my original timeline, so I remember some of that. It was awful."

Amy nodded as she reached out for Lucy's hand. "It was but we got through it, _together_."

"We always do," Lucy told her with a soft smile. "How did you end up in the bunker?"

"I came home one night and the house was a wreck and you were gone. I called 9-1-1 and ten minutes later Homeland Security showed up instead of the police. Agent Christopher was at our house when Mason Industries exploded. She took me into protective custody with Wyatt and Rufus and Jiya after we found footage of Rittenhouse dragging you from the house. She was afraid they might come after me too."

Rittenhouse grabbed her? Faceless agents of Rittenhouse? Not her own mother. She still ended up missing but her mother wasn't directly involved, at least.

"So, you've been here longer than me?" Lucy asked. "Why don't you have a bedroom?"

"I'd rather sleep on that couch then these cardboard cots," Amy told her with a grimace. "So I gave my cot to you when Wyatt and Rufus brought you home."

"But you knew a married Wyatt, right? Not the same one that Rufus and I know," Lucy stated with a furrowed brow.

"I knew the Wyatt who's wife was estranged and who we all suspected was on the brink of a legal separation. I knew the Wyatt who stared at you when he thought no one was looking and stopped drinking because you and Rufus made him want to live his life again. I knew the Wyatt who tried to tear up the bunker to go out there and find you. He was nearly court martialed for you. Did you know that?" Amy looked to Lucy for a response and Lucy quickly shook her head. No, she didn't know that. "The Wyatt I knew was gruffer than yours and angrier but he was still completely in love with you. Wife or no wife."

"And—And me? What about me in this timeline?" Lucy asked nervously.

"You fell hard for him too and we talked about it but you knew there was no point until he addressed whatever was going on with his wife. You tried your damndest to keep your distance. And then you and Wyatt came back from Hollywood as different people with a very different relationship," Amy answered. "And I'm pretty sure you know the rest."

"And you had no opinion about me falling for a married man?" Lucy asked with a teasing grin.

"I had definite opinions and you agreed with them. You just couldn't help yourself. Was I a fan of the married man who was falling in love with my sister? No. Was I a fan of the not-so-married man who left my sister standing alone in a hallway with no indication of where he went? No. Did it really matter? No. Did I want my sister to be happy? Yes. And despite everything the two of you make each other happy so I decided to give Logan a chance. So far, he hasn't let me down," Amy admitted. "And I've paid close attention."

Lucy had been looking for any signs of unhappiness from Amy but, aside from an undercurrent of anger, she saw none. Anger wasn't unusual around the bunker. They were all pissed about being stuck in an underground hell hole.

"And you're okay with...being stuck here?" Lucy asked fearfully.

"I wasn't while you were missing. Those six weeks were miserable," Amy answered as she leaned further into Lucy. "But, as with everything, if you're here it feels less like a hellhole and more like home. Besides, Jiya and Rufus are hilarious. Mason has his moments too. Yeah, I'm stuck here, but it feels like I'm stuck here with a family and that's not really so bad."

"Good," Lucy said with a sigh of relief.

"Now, that you've eased your guilty conscious, can we get back to Wyatt? I need you to admit that you love him already."

"And you think nagging me is the way to get me to do that?" Lucy asked her with a quirked brow and a teasing grin.

"It's not nagging," Amy said with a smirk. "It's pestering. It's different. I pester because I care. I pester because sometimes you need a little push to do the thing we all know you want to do. You're a very slow mover, you know that?"

"I prefer the word deliberate, thanks."

"Right, cause that makes it better. God, you're such a nerd."

Lucy feigned offense and shoved Amy with her shoulder, hard. She fell to the side but managed to save her glass of wine by holding it above her head.

"That never would have happened with a beer," Amy grumbled. "Freaking Flynn drank the last two. Remind me to tear him a new one later."

"Same Amy as always, even if the timeline is new," Lucy said with a bright laugh as she threw her arms around her little sister. "God, I missed you."

Lucy felt Amy squeeze her in return, as only Preston women could, and then run a soothing hand through the ends of her hair. "I'm here now, sis. You don't have to miss me anymore. I promise."

The tears returned to Lucy's eyes because she knew Amy was telling the truth. She could feel it in her bones. This was her sister. The sister she comforted in her bed on bad nights. The sister who made her dream of strawberry milkshakes. The sister who always supported her and pushed her to be better.

Amy was really and truly _back_.

"You're crying, aren't you?" Amy asked knowingly.

Lucy chose not answer her which was just as telling as any actual answer.

"Oh god, you can't cry! If you cry then I'll cry and then we'll just be two silly women crying on a dirty concrete floor. Don't make me a silly woman crying on the floor, Luce," Amy pleaded.

Lucy let out a soggy chuckle and sniffled. "I'm sorry, I think it's a bit too late to stop."

Amy sniffled too and then spoke in a voice thick with emotion. "Dammit. Here we go."

Crying together on the floor wasn't exactly how Lucy always pictured reuniting with Amy, but it felt right. It felt like she shouldn't have expected anything else. It had been a long fight full of a wide variety of emotions and now they were all hitting the two of them at once. But that was over. It was done. She could let all of that go and move forward.

And maybe moving forward meant moving forward with Wyatt. Amy was right. He'd proven himself to her. He'd proven himself in ways she never could have guessed. She had to stop holding back. It wasn't enough for Wyatt to try, _she_ had to try too.

* * *

Amy fell asleep before Lucy did. Her younger sister drank more wine. Lucy was too high off of victory still to go to bed so she tucked a blanket around Amy and headed out into the common area. She knew who she would find out there. She _wanted_ to find him. She could talk to Amy about so many things, but she could never fully express to Amy what it felt like to have her back or what it felt like for her to be gone. Erased from time. Hell, she couldn't even tell her the truth about the Carol who gave up her daughter for Rittenhouse.

But Wyatt knew all of it. She needed someone who knew all of it. All of her.

She stopped when she reached the couch and was surprised to find Wyatt still awake, reading a book. One of her books actually.

"Shouldn't you be asleep by now, Master Sergeant?"

He jumped and nearly dropped the book on the floor.

"Jesus, when did you learn to be stealthy?" He asked as he swiftly caught the book and set it aside.

Lucy chuckled as she watched him sit up and make room for her on the couch. "I don't think I have. I think you were busy reading and not paying attention."

He blushed and ran a nervous hand through his hair. "Yeah, that could be an option."

"Why are you reading my book?" She asked.

"I, um, reread them every now and then to see if any of our timeline changes affect your books. Plus, I...I like reading your writing. I can hear you narrating it in my head," Wyatt told her as she sat down next to him.

"That's sweet," Lucy said with a soft smile as she leaned back against the couch and stole half of Wyatt's blanket. "Do you mind, though, if I interrupt you listening to my imaginary voice so you can listen to my real one?"

His brow creased and worry filled his gaze. "What happened? Something wrong?"

"No," she answered quickly. "Nothing's wrong really. I just realized...as much as I want to there are certain things I can't talk to Amy about. She either won't understand them or it will hurt her too much to hear them. I—I'm not sure what to do about that. I realized, as I was thinking about it, that there is one person who already knows all of it. That I _can_ talk to."

"Rufus?" He asked with a smirk.

She stopped, blinked, and then nodded with a surprised expression. "Okay, _two_ people but, while I enjoy talking to Rufus and I have no doubt he would be helpful, the first person I thought of was _you_ , Wyatt. I wanted to talk to _you_. So, can I? Would you mind if I just...talked? There's so much on my mind and I just need to get it out."

Wyatt grabbed her hand and held it with his fingers linked through hers. "Lucy, I can honestly say, listening to you and being here for you is all I want. Any time, any place."

Lucy tightened her grip on his hand and then met his eyes with a serene smile and a nod. "That's all I want too, Wyatt. To listen to you and be here for you. I—I want to say the words to you. I wish I could say them now but I can't. Until then, I want to be here for you too. I don't want this to be a one way street. Okay?"

He nodded. "Okay. I think we can handle that." He let go of her hand to wrap his arm around her shoulders and pull her into him. He placed a gentle kiss to her temple before he spoke again. "Now, tell me about Amy and this timeline. Tell me what's going on in the brilliant mind of yours, Professor."

So she did. She talked until she fell asleep by his side. She talked until she couldn't talk any longer and the entire time his blue eyes never left hers. She tried to say the words as she drifted off to sleep but they stuck in her throat yet again. She still wasn't ready, but she felt like she would be soon. She already trusted him with her life and she could feel her heart opening little by little as she re-learned how to trust him with that too.

Amy was right, she was a slow mover. But when she moved she committed. She couldn't commit right now. She needed just a little more time.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** 12 Days of Timeless has started on the official twitter! I thought to celebrate I'd posted chapter 18 tonight! I actually wanted to write this before Thanksgiving but things got away from me so you're getting this a little late. Hopefully you like it!
> 
> Thank you for the reviews that I've been getting but I'd really like to hear from more of you! I love talking with my readers and I try to reply to all of you who leave signed reviews! I wish FFN would let me reply to guest reviews the way Ao3 does! If you've left guest reviews on FFN just know I appreciate them so much!
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Angellwings

* * *

Thanksgiving should be a day of family and a day for being grateful. Wyatt had the grateful part down. The family part was the problem. Sure, he had Lucy and the makeshift family he found in the bunker. That would be plenty to keep him happy...if he could ignore the one actual living family member he had left. The one that was currently calling him in the middle of a conversation with Lucy.

It was a rare happy conversation where she was telling him all about Thanksgiving with her sister and how for the first time in a while she was going to have all the people she cared about in one place. A list that, she assured him, included his name. He glanced down at the phone as it rang, grimaced, and declined the call. Lucy noticed but didn't say anything. She continued telling him about her and Amy's tradition of watching Wizard of Oz on Thanksgiving and how excited she was to finally do that again. He lost track of her words after that because his phone rang, again.

He knew the number and there was no way in hell he was answering. Not this time. Not while Lucy was right there next to him. She didn't need to hear this phone call up close and personal. Besides, this type of phone call was full of the same shit every time. It could wait.

"Do you—do you need to get that?" Lucy asked hesitantly.

"No," He answered as he forced a small smile. "Don't worry about it."

"You sure?" She asked with a furrowed brow.

"It's nothing important. Really. They'll leave a voicemail if it's that urgent," he said with a huff. He shoved his phone in his back pocket and turned his full attention on Lucy. No one mattered more than her or the team.

They both headed to the kitchen to help Amy, Jiya, and Rufus with dinner as best they could. His phone rang one more time before a delayed buzz went off in his pocket, indicating he received a voicemail. He really didn't want to listen to it, but he had to. He had to know.

He excused himself from the kitchen and stepped into the hallway to listen to the voicemail. It was a voicemail full of blind rage, sadness, and more resentment than he knew what to do with - all directed at him. His hands fisted and in a moment of seething anger he hurled his phone against the wall. It fell to the floor in several pieces. Was it a waste of something he paid good money for? Yes. Did it feel fucking cathartic to smash that damn thing to pieces? Yes, it did.

"What exactly did the phone do to deserve to be summarily executed?"

Fuck. Lucy. Of course she would see him like this. _Of. Fucking. Course_.

"How long have you been standing there?" He asked with a nervous gulp.

"Long enough to watch you pace a hole in the floor and then murder your phone. I haven't seen you like this since...no scratch that. I have _never_ seen you like this," Lucy told him as she stepped closer to him and the shattered phone on the floor. "What's going on?"

His family wasn't normally something he talked about. In fact, everything Lucy knew she'd learned by accidentally over hearing him first. Which now that he thought about it seemed unfair to her. He wanted her complete trust but he was hesitating to put the same trust in her? Honestly, this should have been something he trusted Lucy with a long time ago.

He leaned against the nearest wall and sighed. "The calls I've been getting are from my dad."

Lucy's lips parted in surprise the way they always did when she learned something unexpected about him. "Your...dad? He's still around?"

"Unfortunately, he seems to be alive and well," Wyatt answered with a roll of his eyes. "And he remembers my number. Surprising, considering how plastered he seemed to be in his voicemail."

"He called you on Thanksgiving?" Lucy's expression looked hopeful and, as much as he hated to do it, he couldn't let that look continue.

"Yeah, for money. That's all he ever calls me for. Well, not all. He throws in a healthy dose of verbal abuse for old times sake," Wyatt admitted with a huff as he kicked the shattered pieces of his phone. "And since I don't have a car to drive into a lake, I guess my phone took the brunt of my frustration."

"Seems so," she agreed. "How often does he call you, Wyatt?"

"There's no pattern to it. It's just whenever he blows through his money stocking up on Jack."

"And you usually answer him?" Lucy asked. He could hear anger in her voice. It was firmer, louder, sharper.

"Sometimes," he admitted.

"Why?" She asked as her eyes narrowed on him.

"Why?" He repeated. As if it had never occurred to him to ask himself that question.

"If you know what's going to happen when he calls, then why pick up?" Lucy clarified.

Silence fell between them as he thought about his answer. Why did he answer? What was the point? It pissed him off, hurt like hell, and left him mourning for a relationship he had no hope of ever having. If anything answering the phone was...self destructive.

But what else was new? That was his most honed skill.

"Wyatt," Lucy said as she stepped closer to him and took his hands in hers. "Maybe...maybe on some level you think you deserve it? Since the day I met you, you've been a glutton for punishment. Maybe it's time to let that go. To let all of it go."

"All of it?" He asked with a bitter scoff. "That seems like a big ask."

She threaded her fingers through his and then squeezed gently. "You don't deserve to punish yourself for the rest of your life. We've all made mistakes, bad choices, and done things we're not proud of but we can't drown in that." She released his hands to trail her hands up his arms, over his neck, and then into his hair. His eyes fell closed as she massaged his scalp. "I don't know everything that happened with your father, Wyatt, but I can guarantee that you didn't deserve it. Don't subject yourself to talking to him in order to punish yourself for things that no one holds against you."

He opened his eyes and quirked a brow at her. "No one?"

She brought her hands up to frame his face and then softly caressed his cheeks with her thumbs, holding his eyes with her own. "No one."

She pulled her his forehead down to hers. She closed her eyes and he watched her expression pinch with pain. His hands went around her waist and he held her closer.

"What? What is it?" He asked.

She shook her head against his and sniffled, but kept her eyes closed. "You deserve to be happy and loved and to feel... _peace_. But I don't know how that happens if you keep all of this self loathing locked up. I wish you could see the things I see. I wish you could see the man that you _are_ as clearly as I do. Maybe if you could then you wouldn't carry around all of this guilt."

She was hurting _for him_? It pained her to watch him torture himself. After everything she'd been through recently, she was concerned about him? God, he loved her. He loved her more than he'd ever loved anyone before and he wanted to spend the rest of his life loving her.

"I can work on it," he promised. "I mean I've been working on it, but I can work on it harder."

Lucy let out a soggy chuckle and nodded. "I would appreciate that, but you should work on it for _you_ not me."

He shrugged and then flashed a lopsided grin at her even though she couldn't see it though her closed lids. "How about for both of us?"

Her eyes blinked open and warm cinnamon bore into him with earnest hope. "That _might_ be allowed. As long as it's as much for you as it is for me."

He nodded. "You've got yourself a deal, ma'am."

"Starting with changing your number," Lucy said sternly as she pulled back and glared insistently at him. "No more calls from your dad, if you can even call him that," she muttered with a huff.

The corners of his mouth twitched upward at the protective edge to her tone. "I think I can manage that."

"In the meantime, come back to the kitchen and help us with dinner," Lucy said with wide pleading eyes. "Everyone is too busy cooking the important dishes to supervise me while I make the dessert. If you don't come back we may have a Rachel from Friends Traditional English Trifle situation happening and no one wants that. Right?"

He let out a teasing snort and grinned at her. "Yeah, like you could sauté beef with peas and onions. I've seen you make a sandwich, Preston. It's pathetic."

She barked out a loud laugh and smacked weakly at his chest. "Shut up. Just come with me and spend some time with your _actual_ family on Thanksgiving, okay? Amy's already opened the wine. It's bound to get interesting - sooner rather than later."

She slipped a hand back into his and pulled him toward the kitchen, chattering away about Amy threatening Flynn's life over the lack of beer in bunker, but he barely heard any of it. He was too stuck on something she said. Spend some time with your _actual_ family, she said. She was right. He should spend time with them because that's what they were, that's what Lucy was.

_His family._

And today, as he watched her face pinch in pain and listened to her defended him against himself, felt like the closest she'd come to saying the words. She wanted him to see himself the way she saw him, and if she loved him then maybe he could start to because Lucy Preston brought out the best in people. She brought out the best in _him_.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~~~
> 
> **A/N:** HEY GUYS. So this chapter contains sexy times, just a heads up. Also, after this I'm taking a break from All In to desperately finish my Holiday one shot. I want to try and have it posted before 12/20 so...yeah I gotta get on that. But the last chapter of All In will for sure be posted before before New Years. Sorry to make you wait, but I PROMISE IT WILL BE WORTH IT. ;)
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Angellwings

* * *

Christmas came quicker than any of them anticipated. Emma kept jumping all the way through to Christmas Eve. They came back from the jump high on victory and adrenaline. Rittenhouse was on the run and so was Emma. With each jump they were closer to putting an end to this war once and for all. Morale was up and even though they returned late on Christmas Eve, none of them were tired.

They decided they were through waiting for Christmas to open presents and exchanged their Secret Santa gifts before they'd even showered or changed. When they finally went to bed, it was early morning on Christmas Day. Lucy and Rufus had switched rooms again. No one really even bothered to ask anymore. It was just assumed. The four of them had left Amy and Mason in the living room playing with Rufus's gift to Amy, Mario Kart and a Nintendo 64. It had been Amy's favorite once upon a time. Lucy hated it when Amy made her play. Amy was too competitive for her, but apparently not for Mason.

Lucy remembered falling asleep to the faint sounds of Amy and Mason yelling as it drifted down the hall to Wyatt's room. With the warmth of Christmas, the excitement of her friends, and then Wyatt there next to her, it was the first time she really and truly felt like the Bunker was home.

She woke before Wyatt with that affection still buzzing in her chest. Natural light shone through the foggy bunker windows and she could make out Wyatt's peacefully dozing face crystal clearly. He was so handsome. She'd always thought so. From the moment he pointed that infuriating lopsided smirk at her when they first met to last night as he laughed off the welding mask Amy gave him as a gag gift.

"In case you need to break out of any more bunkers to save my sister," Amy told him with a wicked grin. "I thought you should have your own."

"Gee thanks," He replied dryly. "I'll treasure it forever."

"I'm sure you will," Amy said with a chuckle. "But just in case I threw in a gift card. I'm not that mean."

The fact that Wyatt and Amy got along so well did wonders for Lucy's soul. That may sound dramatic but Amy was the most important person in her life and Wyatt was working his way to even footing with her. It was important to Lucy that they liked each other.

While none of them had ever dreamed about spending Christmas in a dirty underground bunker, Lucy had to admit it was almost perfect. She placed a quick soft kiss to Wyatt's jaw before slipping out of bed with all the stealth she could muster and headed for the kitchen. No one else was awake yet, which wasn't surprising. They were all up late. Amy was sound asleep on the couch, controller for the Nintendo 64 on the coffee table in front of her.

What was this she was feeling? Was it contentment? Peace? It had been so long she didn't even know what to label it anymore. All she knew was that it felt... _good_. It felt breathtakingly good. She made cups of coffee for herself and Wyatt and then tiptoed back to their room. When she opened the door she found Wyatt just starting to sit up and blink blearily at her empty sliver of the cot.

"You left?" He asked in a groggy voice.

"Just to get coffee," she assured him. "You know how Rufus gets if he wakes up and there's not already a pot there waiting for him."

Wyatt let out a deep sleepy chuckle and nodded. "Good thinking."

She sat down on the edge of the bed and handed him one of the mugs.

Wyatt laughed lightly and traced over one of the shapes on her flannel pajama pants. "I didn't get a good look at these last night. Are those...gnomes in Santa hats holding candy canes?"

Lucy nodded and grinned at him. "It's a Preston family tradition. Matching Christmas Pajamas. Amy picked these out. I'm guessing you didn't see my shirt?"

He glanced up from the pants to the grey loose fitting t-shirt and snickered. " _Gnome_ for the holidays. Of course. Cute."

"Amy thinks so," Lucy told him.

He smirked and winked at her. "I think so too. Lucy Preston and whimsical fun is a rare sight."

She laughed and rolled her eyes at him. "I can be whimsical if I want to be."

"You mean if Amy makes you?" He asked her with a knowing grin.

"Keep going, Sweetheart. Let's see if I still want to give you your Christmas present when you're done," Lucy said with quirked brow and an amused smile.

"We exchanged presents last night, _Babydoll_ , and I'm pretty sure you weren't my Secret Santa," he said with a grin and a roll of his eyes.

"I know we all agreed to only do Secret Santa but, um, well I maybe broke the rules," Lucy told him as she smiled secretively at him and then took a sip of her coffee.

"Wait, you really got me a present?" He asked.

She set her coffee cup down on the floor and then crossed the room to the bag of her clothes on the other cot. She pulled out a wide and flat box tied with a red ribbon and then set it in his lap.

"Merry Christmas," she told him with a wink.

He smiled slowly at her as he untied the ribbon and opened the box. His eyes widened at the gift inside. "Where did you get this?"

"On our last jump at that marketplace we had to search? There was someone there with handmade leather goods. I saw that and I couldn't just keep walking," she told him as he lifted the handmade leather knife sheath from the box. She sat back down on the cot and then moved his cup of coffee to the floor next to hers. "It's made specifically for a Bowie knife and I know you don't have one for yours so… **.** "

"This is perfect," Wyatt told her immediately as he reverently studied the sheath. It really was perfect and it wasn't something he would have thought to buy for himself. It was a gift that was so uniquely Lucy. It was deeply personal and yet had poignant historical significance. "Thank you."

He leaned across the distance between them and placed a slow grateful kiss to her lips. She deepened the kiss and pushed her hands back into his hair. He almost let himself get too wrapped up in the kiss and forget that he had a gift of his own for her. He willed himself to pull back, but he didn't completely withdrawal. His forehead and his nose were still touching hers as he spoke.

"Coincidentally, I broke the rules too," he told her with a grin.

She chuckled and nodded. "Of course you did. That's a more common occurrence for you than me."

His amused snort was all he needed to do to acknowledge the truth in her statement. "You said something at Thanksgiving that got me thinking. You asked me to spend time with my _actual_ family and you were right. This is my actual family. _You_ and Rufus and Jiya and everyone else here - you are all my family. _We're_ a family. And I thought you might like a reminder of that. Something to keep with you." His hand reached out before he could stop himself and his fingers gently slipped under the chain of her locket. He followed the delicate chain until it reached the locket at the bottom. "Like this piece of Amy you always kept with you."

Her eyes were focused on his when he found them again. He leaned away from her to reach in the drawer of his bedside table for a small round box. It looked vintage and was covered in blue velvet, slightly bigger than a ring box. He took her hand and placed the box in her palm. "Mine was also purchased on a mission," he said with a soft smile.

Her eyes misted over and she let out a watery chuckle. "Great minds think alike, I guess." She gingerly pried open the box to reveal a gold locket, similar to the one already on her chain. She took in a shaky breath and met his eyes curiously. "A locket?"

He nodded. "Open it."

She tugged at the clasp and the brought a hand to her mouth at the picture inside. It was of the entire Time Team - Jiya, Mason, and Denise included. The other side was left empty, for her to fill herself supposedly. "Wyatt, this is...this is beautiful."

She pulled the chain up and over her head, ready to add the second locket to it. Once it was on she put the necklace back on and let her hand fall to where the two lockets had gathered. Keeping Amy close to her heart had kept her fighting when all of this first started but this fight was about so much more than Amy. It was about all of them together. Now that she had the second locket she couldn't imagine it not being there. How did Wyatt know? How did he know that she needed a piece of them with her when she didn't even know it herself?

She threw herself at him in a tight embrace and pressed her face into the curve of his neck, peppering him with little kisses.

"Merry Christmas, Lucy," Wyatt told her as his arms wrapped even tighter around her.

He wasn't saying those famous three words, but she felt them all the same. In everything he said or did those words were there. Even when he was frustrated with her or they were arguing - he loved her. Even after all this time without hearing the words in return. She had doubted him at nearly every turn and yet here there were. He was once again her safe space, her secret keeper, her best friend, her biggest fan, and her greatest challenger. Everything she ever needed him to be. She asked him to prove that he was all in. He said he would…

And he had. So many times. Over and over again. Something surged in her chest. It was a feeling so warm and so pure that she knew it could only be one thing. The word she had avoided for so long was still stuck in her throat but it was close to breaking free. Try as she might the words wouldn't come. Instead, she pulled back from their embrace and met his eyes. When she searched his eyes she found exactly what she expected, deep and abiding love in the perfect shade of cobalt blue.

When faced with those steadfast eyes what else could she do other than kiss him? She wrapped her arms around his neck with a sudden pounce and met his lips with hers. God, she loved him. She did. She knew she did.

But they were still stuck in this bunker that had caused them both so much pain and maybe it left her stuck too. Emotionally frozen in the moment after he left and no matter how much he helped her thaw, she still couldn't move forward. The more she sought inward clarity about her emotions, the more stuck the words felt, and the more she began to rely on her actions.

Wyatt was kissing her back as passionately as he could but her hands were the first to wander. She uncoiled her arms from around his neck and trailed them down his arms and then his chest before slipping underneath the bottom hem of his t-shirt. Her hands met hard muscle and warm skin and as soon as they did Wyatt stiffened for a moment before deepening the kiss. She tugged the shirt upward and helped Wyatt slip his arms out one at a time as they continued to kiss and finally they had to break apart to breathe. When they did the shirt came off and joined her bag on the other cot.

She stood from the cot with a smirk and shimmied out of her christmas pajama pants, leaving her in front of him in her underwear and a cheesy Christmas shirt. She came back to him a moment later and straddled his lap. His eyes were heated but she could still see the question in them. Did she really want this? Was she sure she wanted him?

She smirked teasingly at him and then held her arms up over her head. "Help a girl out of her Christmas pajamas, will you?"

The question was replaced with mirth as he chuckled at her and slowly peeled the t-shirt off of her. She'd expected a lot of things from him, but she never expected to feel his lips and tongue branding a trail up her stomach as her shirt was pushed higher and higher. There was no bra to get in his way as the shirt gathered above her breasts. He held the shirt clear with one gentle calloused hand on her sternum and then sought out his intended target with his mouth. He teased and licked and circled each nipple until breathy moans were escaping her lips, even despite the teeth worrying her bottom lip that attempted to keep them at bay.

At last, the shirt came off and his lips found hers again. His hands reverently grazed her sides and seemed to stop to feel each individual rib. Her arms wrapped around his neck as he laid them back on the cot. He stood from the cot, as she had earlier, to remove his flannel pajama pants and toss them aside. Then suddenly he was next to her again, hooking his fingers under the elastic of her underwear. She lifted her hips as he tugged. The cotton underwear slid down her legs easily until she could kick them away, leaving them both bare in front of each other.

This wasn't 1941. There was no big bed and roaring fire or luxurious sheets. It was just the two of them in 2018 on a tiny cot in a chilly rusted bunker. But...Lucy was certain this would be just as memorable. Just as monumentous. Because this was her declaration of love. Until the words finally broke free, _this_ was how she expressed herself. She could show him. She could expose everything but her heart and mean it with her entire soul.

After a moment of near worshipful staring he came back to her and settled himself in between her legs. She kissed him languidly with her hands on either side of his face and she felt his hands slide downward. Over her hips and then the outside of her thighs before moving inward. She arched against him as she felt first one and then two fingers slip inside of her. His name fell from her lips in a desperate plea. She needed this. She need _him._ And she needed him _now_. It had been too long since 1941 and she was tired of telling herself to wait - tired of talking herself out of it. He wanted her and she wanted him. Who gave a damn about anything else?

As if he read her thoughts, he slid himself into her with one thrust. One slow and deep thrust. Almost as if he were slipping into a hot bath. He pressed his face into her neck as he slid out and back in again. Harder this time. She couldn't stop the cry that tore from her throat as he filled her and fit her.

"God, you're perfect," He muttered against her skin. "I've missed you."

She kissed his temple and tenderly smoothed his hair with her hands. "Missed you too," she said through a gasp.

She lifted her hips as he thrust again and suddenly they were lost. They were lost in a frenzy of passion and reckless heat. Hands wandered, mouths tasted, teeth nipped on pure instinct until the tension they built exploded and they collapsed onto the cot, satisfied and spent.

In the midst of their panting and sated grinning, Lucy felt Wyatt's hand find the thin chain that hung across her naked chest. The locket. She didn't even realize she still had it on. He settled an open mouthed kiss on the hinge of her jaw before sliding his lips to the shell of her ear. His voice was low and husky.

"When I bought this locket I never thought it would lead us here," he said with a deep chuckle.

"Glad it did?" She asked him with a grin and sultry glance.

He laughed loudly at her. "Do I really have to answer that? Because if you don't know the answer to that already then we should probably start again and again until you do."

She blushed and beamed at him in amusement. "You mean we only get an encore if I _don't_ know the answer? That seems unfair."

"Trust me, Luce," he said as he wrapped his arms around her. He pulled her to him until they were lying naked chest to naked chest. "We can have an encore anytime you want."

She leaned across the small space between them to kiss him, lingering and long. She withdrew from the kiss with a grin and a chuckle before she spoke again. "Well, then, Merry Christmas to me."

"Oh, it's a merry Christmas alright," Wyatt replied with a bright smile. "The merriest I've had in a very long time."

"Me too," Lucy said with a contented sigh as she rested her forehead against his. "Thanks to you."

What she said was thank you, but what she meant to say was _I love you_. Hopefully, it would do until she could manage to say those three little words.

Their noses bumped against each other before his lips dipped down to hers and hovered there. "Anything for you, ma'am," he whispered.

And she believed him. She really and truly believed him.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **A/N:** This is the final chapter! I am going to borrow a little from our brilliant finale movie for the beginning of this chapter. I wanted to wrap up RH in the last chapter and I did have some ideas on how before the movie but I love the idea of making a deal with Ben Cahill and Riya Industries and Mason's government contacts and Wyatt's new job with DHS so I'm keeping all of it lol. Also, this is fanfic so...EVERYONE LIVES. Amy, The Flynns, Garcia Flynn himself...ALL OF THEM.
> 
> Thank you so much to all of you who have followed this story from the beginning. Specifically to **TheVelvetDusk** , who's love for the story kept me going on it when people seemed to have drifted away from it, and **katertots** , who was so helpful and encouraging while I was working on this last chapter!
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Angellwings

They were done. Suddenly and out of the blue, they were done.

Just two days after Christmas, Christopher was finally able to make a deal with Ben Cahill for the locations of every Rittenhouse property on either coast. The Mothership was in their custody and they had the name of the Rittenhouse agent who issued the hit on The Flynns. Emma was under arrest and her followers were being rounded up.

Their mission was complete.

They went on one last time travel mission to help Flynn save his family. After it was over, Flynn stayed in the Bunker long enough to confirm his girls were safe before the perimeter alarm sounded and Garcia Flynn was gone. There was a note left for Lucy on one of the kitchen tables explaining that he was keeping his promise. He would visit his girls and then disappear. He didn't deserve a happy ending, he said. He committed too many crimes. Christopher had a warrant out for his arrest and agents casting a wide net for him along with any remaining Rittenhouse agents.

She wouldn't find him. They all knew it.

Now they were all figuring out what to do with their lives. Mason was starting a new company and he was in meetings with contacts about government contracts. Rufus and Jiya had decided on a joint venture, personally and professionally. Denise had gotten Wyatt a position reporting to her at Homeland Security. He hadn't told Lucy about that part yet. She was under the impression he would need to report back to Pendleton soon. Lucy was still technically on her leave of absence from Stanford.

Though, after Carol's memorial service, a rumor went around that Lucy was missing and presumed dead. They didn't know Lucy was there. He escorted her there himself, but no one spotted her. So, as far as they were concerned Lucy Preston didn't even attend her own mother's funeral and that was out of character for a Preston. Prestons were all about legacy.

And, of course, that was the first thing Lucy learned about her old life once they stepped outside the bunker. He could see the stress coming from a mile away and he planned to head it off. Stanford wasn't expecting her back yet and he still had two weeks before he officially reported in to Agent Christopher. Lucy could spend her time avoiding her mother's house, that now belonged to her, and he could spend his time airing out his old apartment _or_ they could run away for a week or two.

Or at least through New Years Day.

And that was what led him to where he was now, packing a bag of Lucy's things with the purpose of whisking her away on New Years Eve. He heard footsteps from the hallway and waited for Lucy to walk through her bedroom door. She stopped just over the threshold and stared him with a furrowed brow.

"What are you doing?" She asked him.

"Getting us out of here," he answered. "We've spent the last year living in a rusted tin can fighting an evil cult and trying to keep a solid grip on history. I'm exhausted. You're exhausted. We need a break before we jump right back into our old normal lives." He motioned around her old childhood bedroom before continuing. "Or our old normal living situations."

"I'm not even sure I know _how_ to be normal anymore," Lucy told him with a tired sigh.

"Neither do I, which is why we need a weekend just for us so we can start to get used to all of this," he told her as he zipped up her suitcase.

"Now?" Lucy asked him as a hesitant grin formed on her face.

He nodded. "Now. My bag is already in the car."

"So, that's why you came over?" She asked him as her grin grew. "To take me away?"

"Yes," he replied honestly. "I'm taking you away for some one on one time."

"Just us?" Lucy asked with a hopeful smirk. "That seems too good to be true."

"It's not," he told her as he crossed the room and pulled her to him with his hands on her hips. "Not anymore."

"No more interruptions? Really? Seems far fetched," she said with a chuckle as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Trust me, where we're going not even housekeeping will be interrupting us," Wyatt told her with a crooked smile and a wink.

Her nose wrinkled in playful disgust. "Does that mean we have to make our own bed?"

"No, that means I'll be making the bed. Your corners are hideous," he replied in a flat tone.

"Well, excuse me, Master Sergeant, but I learned how to make a bed from my mother not the U.S. Army," she said, laughing as she spoke.

"Does that mean you'll go?" He asked with a pleading glance and matching smile.

She nodded and then closed the distance between them to place a chaste kiss on his lips. "I'll go anywhere you go, Wyatt. Especially if it means being alone."

Within an hour they were on the road. He rented a cabin in the middle of nowhere, up in the mountains where even cell signal was hard to come by. He was serious when he said no interuptions. He didn't know when an opportunity to be alone with her like this would come again and he planned to take full advantage.

With only one stop at a nearby grocery store, they made it to their destination within four hours. He pulled up outside the small cozy cabin and looked over at Lucy for her reaction. The sunny smile on her face was more than enough assurance that he made the right call. Inside there was one bedroom, one bathroom, a small living room, and a recently updated kitchen. The bathroom had a jacuzzi tub with a window that looked out over the mountains. That was the feature that sold him on the place. He knew she would love it.

"Would it be wrong to shut myself off from the world and just live here for the rest of my life?" Lucy asked him, never once taking her eyes off the cabin.

He laughed and then leaned across to kiss her temple. "And you haven't even seen the bathroom yet."

Her eyebrows rose and she turned to him with a curious expression. "Don't tell me, huge bathtub?"

He grinned at her knowingly before replying. "Jacuzzi tub."

"Yes, okay, that settles it," Lucy said with decisive nod. "We are never leaving."

"The car or the cabin? Because I would really like to leave the car. There's groceries in the back seat."

She smacked his arm playfully and laughed. "Get out. Get out of the car _now_."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied with a teasing smirk. "Any other orders you'd like me to follow or…"

"Just get out of the car, Soldier," she said with an over exaggerated huff.

They brought in the bags and the groceries and unpacked. Once that was done they both collapsed onto the couch matching contented sighs.

"It's so quiet," Lucy told him observantly. "No groaning pipes or creaking metal doors."

"Or traffic buzzing by my open apartment windows," Wyatt agreed.

"Your place still smell like stale air?" She asked him with an sympathetic smile.

"It's not going away. Honestly, I should probably just move," he told her with a chuckle.

He sounded like he was joking, but he wasn't. That apartment was a reminder of the person he was before Lucy and Rufus. The Bunker forced them both to become a part of his life more than ever before and he didn't want to go back to the way things were.

"I know the feeling," Lucy said with a sigh. "Amy and I have been meeting with a realtor this past week and a few auction houses. She agrees the house is too big for the me or her. Besides, I have _got_ to sell that house and all of _her_ antiques." There was no question as to who the _her_ was referring to. Carol's memory was still a deep cut for Lucy. "I can't look at them anymore. I know she chose me in the end but she was still...she was never who I thought she was and all that house does is remind me of that. It has to go, along with every historical artifact she ever brought home. I'm purging it. I'm purging all of it and starting over."

"Whatever you need to do, Luce," he said as he put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side. "Do it. This is your chance to make your life what _you_ want it to be."

"What I want it to be," she repeated with a pensive expression. "I'm not even sure I know what that is anymore. I used to. I worked my whole life to teach at Stanford like my mother, to be exactly like her. Is that still what I want? I mean I loved teaching, still do I think, but does it have to be at Stanford? Does it even have to be in California? I don't know."

"Well," Wyatt said as he took in a long nervous breath. "I'll be around if you want help figuring it out."

Her brow furrowed and she gave him a confused glance. "You will? But I thought...aren't they expecting you back at Pendleton?"

He flashed her half of a secretive grin. "Turns out that I've been assigned to Special Projects at Homeland with Agent Christopher. Aside from a remote case or two, I'll be staying in Palo Alto. With you."

"And Rufus," she reminded him with a mirthful smile and a quirked brow.

"Yeah, him too," Wyatt said with a casual shrug. "I guess."

She laughed softly and smacked his shoulder before giving him a reluctant smile. "Seriously, though. You're staying?"

He smiled at her, warm and slow, before replying, "I'm staying."

Her face lit up, eyes wide with the stunning brightness of a full smile, and the happiness shining in her eyes caused a skip in his heartbeat. First, because seeing Lucy happy would always take his breath away and, second, because seeing proof of what he meant to her written on her face was the biggest thrill he'd ever felt. She let out an elated noise between a squeak and a squeal and threw herself at him. He chuckled against her ear and tightened his arms around her. She pulled back suddenly to meet his eyes with a worried expression.

"Wait," she said with a furrowed brow. "You're staying because it's what _you_ want, right? Because if it's not then you—"

"It's what I want. I couldn't imagine leaving now, Luce. Not without you," he said honestly.

He watched as her eyes watered and she pressed a hand to her lips. She closed her eyes for a moment and when she opened them two silent tears fell as she dropped her hand from her mouth to reveal another megawatt smile, pointed right at him. It was nearly blinding. He reached a hand out to cup her cheek and then brushed a tear away with his thumb.

"I hope these are happy tears." He met her eyes searchingly, waiting for confirmation.

She nodded and then turned her head to kiss the palm of his hand. "Tears of relief and joy. I promise. I thought for sure that you would—" she paused and then swallowed loudly. "I thought this weekend was goodbye. For a little while anyway."

He shook his head at her and then moved his hand to the back of her neck, kneading the the tense muscles there. "Lucy, if this weekend is anything, it's a new beginning. For both of us. The time travel is behind us. So is the Bunker and all the shit we went through down there. We're out in the open and free to start living again and I was hoping...well I was hoping we could figure that out together, you and me."

Her watery smile grew and she nodded. "New year, new us?"

"Well, not totally new I hope," Wyatt said with a rakish smirk. "I kinda like more than a few of the things we've done this year. I'd like to _keep_ doing those things."

She let out a soggy buoyant laugh and wiped her own watery eyes. "I'd like to keep doing those things too. You're pretty adept at _those things_."

"Well, thank you." He nodded his gratitude and and grinned at her. "The feeling's mutual, ma'am."

There were more tears as she slid into his lap and wrapped herself around him. She pressed her forehead to his and closed her eyes. He kept his eyes on her face as he watched her expression crumple and felt her shake her head against his.

"It's all really over, isn't it?" She asked with a shaky breath. "The time travel and the running and Rittenhouse...it's really finally over."

He brought his hands up to frame her face and then drew her lips to his for an earnest kiss. Her lips parted to allowed him to deepen the kiss, which he did immediately. Tongues met and teeth gently nipped as the kiss languidly lingered. Finally he pulled back with a small kiss to the tip of her nose.

"It's really over, Luce," he assured her. "We survived it. _You_ survived it. And not only that, but we _won_."

Her muscles practically melted against him. It was a delayed reaction to a victory that was nearly a week old but he would be lying if he said this was unexpected. They were all held prisoner by this war for so long and it would take time to process that they were free.

"We actually can move forward," she murmured before running her hands through his hair. "We're not stuck in the bunker anymore."

"You can do or have whatever you want. You decide. _You choose_ ," he said as he ran his fingers down the side of her face tenderly and then stopped to grip her chin and bring her eyes to meet his.

She took a deep breath and nodded. "Good. Do you know what my first real choice is?"

He shook his head at her with an encouraging smile. "But I'm eager to find out."

" _You_ ," she said on a exhale. "I choose you." She punctuated her statement with a long kiss and then arched back, leaving one hand massaging his scalp. "I have felt so lost and out of control since I was taken by Rittenhouse and you are the only thing that kept from letting go completely. You've been so amazingly patient and understanding. Wyatt, I know how hard this has been for you. I read every moment of it in your face. But you never faltered, once you decided what you wanted." She kissed him again and then kept her lips hovering just above his. She fixed a penetrating stare on him as she continued. "I asked you to prove to me that you were all in and you did - many times over."

His hand left her chin and settled on the curve of her neck. He kept his eyes connected to her molten chocolate irises as he shook his head at her in uncertainty. He thought he knew what she was saying, but...he couldn't stand the idea of being wrong. "Lucy, what — what are you saying?"

"Say the words, Wyatt," she said as her eyes began to water again and smile spread across her face. "Tell me how you feel about me." One of her hands found purchase on his cheek and absently smoothed across his stubble. "Please."

He could never deny her the truth, especially when it came to his heart. Not now. Not after everything they had been through. "I love you, Lucy. With all I am and everything I have."

She nodded, sighed contentedly and then spoke with yet another radiant smile. "I love you too. With every broken piece of me. I'm sorry it took me so long to say it back. I've wanted to for so long but—"

He cut her off with an excited kiss. He couldn't help it. No amount of control could have kept his lips from finding hers in that moment. He waited nearly a year for those words and finally hearing them fall from her lips made the entire struggle worth it. Loving Lucy and then having her love him in return was everything he ever wanted for the rest of his life. When he finally pried his lips away from hers he caught her eyes again to make sure she heard and understood everything he planned to say next.

"Do not apologize," he told her. "I don't care why it took you so long. I told you to take all the time you needed and I meant it. All that matters to me is where we are now and where we go from here."

"We've got a whole new year to figure that out," Lucy promised him. "I want to do that. _Together_ like you said. You and me with no time travel or secret world dominating cults. Just... _Lucy and Wyatt_."

"Lucy and Wyatt," he repeated with a lighthearted smile and a nod. "I like the sound of that."

"Me too," she told him as she wrapped her arms around his neck and shifted her position in his lap.

He nearly groaned out loud as she straddled him. She pressed herself as close to him as she could with no assistance from him. It was the beginnings of the delicious friction they were just starting to really explore. That one night in Hollywood and then the handful of them since Christmas weren't nearly enough and he knew they never would be.

She ground herself against him and he felt her lips on the hinge of his jaw. His head fell back on the couch behind him as she kissed a scorching trail from his jaw down his neck and passed the top undone buttons of his shirt. He could feel an influx of heat coursing through his veins and the need pounding in his heart, beating against his ribs, as her fingers deftly began to work on the rest of his buttons. He gripped her hips as she thrust them into him again and let out a guttural moan from the back of his throat.

He felt her smirk against his chest as she continued to kiss him before she raised back up to be face to face with him. She kissed him deeply and then sucked his bottom lip between hers before pulling back to give him a sultry grin.

"Let's ring the new year in with a bang, huh?" She asked him with a wink.

He laughed at her insinuation as both of his hands dove into her hair and dragged her mouth back to his for a searing kiss. "No arguments here, Preston. I'm all for kissing the old year out and the new year in. _Trust me_."

"Oh, I plan to do a little more than kissing," she assured him as she reached for the bottom hem of her t-shirt and lifted.

"God, I love you," he told her as he watched her shirt sail across the room.

She chuckled and then pressed yet another firm kiss to his mouth. "I love you, too. Now, I believe it's your turn."

He was going to be absolutely insatiable for this woman for the rest of his life. He could already tell. He could never have too much of her. He never wanted anything less than what they were giving each other right now.

Which was _everything_.

He was going all in on Lucy Preston and it seemed she was calling his bet.


End file.
